Thank you all for your comforting words and prayers. Kim is in pain, but it is not entirely her pain doctor's fault. We have been working with her to keep Kim's pain under control. However whenever Kim is rushed to the hospital for breathing problems or for increased calcium levels, the doctors (not her regular doctors) take her off the pain meds or lower them so that Kim responds better. It really sucks and we are so angry. You can't believe how many times we have argued witht he doctors about Kim's pain. It seems like just when her pain is controlled, something happens, and these assasine doctors take her off them, and then she suffers again. I am praying so hard for a mircale. Thank you again and I will keep you all posted on her condition.

God Bless you all.

Angie
The only thing I can think to say to you is that you say she has given you permission to act for her in this, and to tell them what ever they intend to do, THEY DO NOT REDUCE THE PAIN MEDICATION EVER.. My family stood guard over my Aunt when she was in hospital, never while she was unable to speak was she left without a family member, it should not need to be so, but it worked, we kept a clipboard at the end of the bed for the family to update daily so we all knew what was happening.. I'm so sorry that you are going to have to be strong and get through this, but you will..
Remember walking in the sunshine... it will shine again for you..
love and hugs
Helen

Helen,

We are Kim's voice,and she does communicate through writing everytime she is in the hospital, but despite our efforts to keep her meds controlled, they still decrease the meds. A few times they were worried that she had overdosed, os they took off her fentynol patches and decreased her dilaudid from 24mg to 12mg. We argued and demanded that she be kept on her normal dosage so that she is not in a huge amount of pain, but the they didn't listen at all. So along with her pain, she also went through withdrawl. It's been nothing but bad. We are at the point where we don't even want to take her to the hospital again. They don't listen - ever (the nurses do, but the doctors (not her reg docs) are horrible!). I'm not sure what her options are at this point since the cancer is just eating away at her and spreading. I keep praying that something will happen to kill this cancer.

Angie,

Be sure and contact the patient advocate at the hospital. Tell them what has been going on and how you feel about avoiding the hospital now at all costs because of the suffering they are needlessly putting your sister through. Even if they have a hunch she is overdosing from the heavy pain meds, they should not be allowed to make her suffer more. Does Kim have a DNR order and power of attorney for the you or a family member? This could help with what you are going through.

Sorry to see such a tough ordeal stacked on top of a pretty tough ordeal to begin with. My thoughts and prayers to you and your family through such a difficult time.

Ed

Angie,
My heart feels your pain. My sister Marcy went through the same thing your sister is. He cancer came fast, three reocurrences in one year. It also ate away her neck and the side of her face. It was truly unbearable, but I stayed as strong as possible for Marcy, she needed us so much. The pain of watching someone you love so much suffer is heart wrenching to say the least. I send you my prayers from the bottom of my heart.

God Bless you all,
Michelle

Angie,

I am so sorry your family has to go through this. Ed is right. You definitely should contact the Patient Advocate at the hospital.

I know this isn't going to be what you want to hear and I imagine I will get some flak from posting it, but here goes anyway. I think it is time you consider contacting hospice. One of their biggest goals is to keep the patient as pain-free and comfortable as possible. Most of them are experts at pain control.

I know this will be one of the hardest decisions any of you ever have to make, but it may mean the difference between Kim spending her last days in pain or spending them in some semblance of comfort. And the good thing about hospice is that you can leave it and go back to treatment anytime you want. I assume she kept the appointment with the ENT on Monday. Perhaps the prognosis he gave will help you to decide if hospice is the right choice.

I am still hoping for a miracle for Kim, along with everyone else. I am just sorry to say that the chance of it happening is pretty slim and the main thing now is keeping Kim as comfortable and pain-free as possible. My heart goes out to you all.

Rosie

Angie,

I, too, am sorry to have to agree with Rosie. Keep in mind, with hospice care you will receive a highly qualified medical care team that deals with the more intense physical and emotional issues your family is experiencing right now. Treatment can continue provided the doctor states it is palliative care to help in pain management, although I am not sure if Kim is continuing with the treatment right now. The bottom line is that the hospice folks would not have tolerated the hospital adjusting pain meds under any circumstances without approval from the hospice pain management doctor(s).

With all Kim is enduring right now, don't allow them to force her to endure more pain. It just isn't right.

Ed