Hey everybody A little background information:

My name is Ang. My father is 46 years old. Exactly one year ago, my dad discovered a mass on his tongue. The dr's found out it was cancer. They removed it, did radiation. We thought it was over.

It wasn't.

The cancer had moved to his lymph node. The docs did surgery, removed a golf ball sized tumor and they did more radiation. We finally thought we were through.

We were wrong.

The cancer came back. It had spread on the back of his tongue and into his tonsils. He is now going through chemo. My dad has gone from 250 lbs to 160 lbs. He has to have a feeding tube because he can't eat. The mucous that comes along with the chemo is sooooo bad that he was choking on it and couldn't breathe.

I don't know what to do anymore I thought I was strong. My dad seems so determined to beat this thing. I just don't know how much more he can handle. He's having a trach tube put in on Tuesday to help him breathe as the tumor is right by his airway, the mucous isn't helping any matters, and he keeps getting cellulitis in his neck that causes it to swell.

sldkfjsdlkjf ugh!! I'm sorry to rant. It's so nice to meet you all.

Ang;
Welcome aboard, you will find friendly advice, and emotional support here in this forum. The mucocitis caused by the chemotherapy is normal but that doesn't make it any less manageable. I still have to sleep in a recliner and cannot lay in a horizonical plane.
Darrell

Ang:
I am right there with you. My dad was diagnosed in Aug 2005 with SCC left hard/soft palate & 1 left lymph Node. Had radiation finished in November and now they say he may have cancer again on the other side. Now I feel exhausted, beaten, and let down. We have to start all over again. But, we have to. We can't let this beat us. He can only handle it if you can. I have been the optimistic one giving him all the information I find here. But when we got that call again, I just......broke down. Throughout the next two days he was really bad and told me that I didn't look happy anymore and was it that bad. I then realized that I couldn't be that way FOR him. I need to forget what I feel and keep going for him. And that's what we have to do. I know how you feel. We are all here for you.

Thank you so much for your replies. It really means a lot to me that you both took the time to reply.

I'm being as strong as I can. My dad is actually handling it better than any of us (my mom (his wife), my brother and sister). We're there for him as best as we can be...it just seems so hard when it's constantly one blow after another....one bad doctor's appointment after another. But, like I mentioned before...dad is so optimistic. He said he was going to beat this...and I believe him.

Thank you again for your replies. If you all every need anything from me, please don't hesitate to message or e-mail me!!!

To Ang and P. Silvestri. This is to both of you because you seem to be in very similar situations-fighting fear, anger and a sense of helplessness about your Dad's battle with this disease. You are both right that you need to be strong for your family. But I want to suggest to you that you also use this time to share as much love and as many wonderful memories as you can. Those acts, in themselves, will help all of you get through this. Our parents are "irreplaceable" and too often in our busy lives we forget that they will no longer be with us on this earth. Don't get so caught up in fighting the battle that you forget to just be there and love them. Amy

Yes, they are irreplaceable.....