#5197 03-22-2005 08:50 PM | Joined: Aug 2004 Posts: 45 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | OP  Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2004 Posts: 45 | Hi Everyone,
It has been 5 months since my Grandma passed away from oral cancer. I came to you all for advice on my Grandma's condition and just wanted to say thank you. I haven't been on the site since she passed away. I miss her so very much.....and what I wouldn't do to have just one more day with her. Since her passing I found out the type of cancer she had was very rare. I am still unsure of the name the doctors used for it. I do know now there was no hope right from the beginning. They knew she wasn't going to leave the Cross Cancer Institute. I don't think it was right for the doctors to hide this information from us.....and I think if they had been honest it would have been easier to cope with. The truth is....the doctors didn't know what they were dealing with. If I have learned anything from this. Don't put off that doctor's appointment and ask questions.
Take care.
Christy | | |
#5198 03-23-2005 06:55 AM | Joined: Jan 2005 Posts: 11 Member | | Member
Joined: Jan 2005 Posts: 11 | Hi Christy
My condolences to you and your family on the passing of your Grandma. From the sound of it she had a lot of love around her, which I am sure helped her enormously.
Wishing you a happy and joyful future.
Lawrence
Co-caregiver for friend with T2N2BMO squamous cell carcinoma of oropharynx.
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#5199 03-23-2005 02:22 PM | Joined: Feb 2004 Posts: 218 Gold Member (200+ posts) | | Gold Member (200+ posts)
Joined: Feb 2004 Posts: 218 | Christy,
I'm sure it was a great comfort to your grandmother to have such a loving and thoughtful grand-daughter caring for her during illness. From your posts, I know the whole process was very painful and frustrating. At least your grandmother is no longer suffering from this relentless disease.
My sympathies to you and your family. - Sheldon
Dx 1/29/04, SCC, T2N0M0
Tx 2/12/04 Surgery, 4/15/04 66 Gy. radiation (36 sessions)
Dx 3/15/2016, SCC, pT1NX
Tx 3/29/16 Surgery
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#5200 03-23-2005 04:02 PM | Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 2,606 Likes: 2 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 2,606 Likes: 2 | Christy,
I am so glad to hear from you. I have thought of you often and I am truly sorry for what you, your grandmother and your family had to endure.
Treasure all the memories and especially how much she appreciated and loved you for all you did for her. I know it made a tremendous difference in her life to have you.
Ed
SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023
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#5201 03-23-2005 05:19 PM | Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,163 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,163 | Hi Christy,
Nice to hear from you again. One thing I found out is doctors are human. They make mistakes. Not to share information with the family is unacceptable treatment. We can deal with it "Just Be Honest With Us" Hoping all the good memories you have of your Grandma eases the pain of her passing. I take comfort in knowing she suffers no more.
Keep in touch, you have invaluable experience to share with us as well as newcomers.
Danny Boy
Daniel Bogan DX 7/16/03 Right tonsil,SCC T4NOMO. right side neck disection, IMRT Radiation x 33.
Recurrance in June 05 in right tonsil area. Now receiving palliative chemo (Erbitux) starting 3/9/06
Our good friend and loved member of the forum has passed away RIP Dannyboy 7-16-2006
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#5202 03-23-2005 06:02 PM | Joined: Aug 2004 Posts: 45 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | | OP Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2004 Posts: 45 | Hi Everyone,
Thank you for your replies....as always....:-)) I was happy to hear from both Danny and Ed.....I hope you are both doing well. I was going to come back several times, but just couldn't. I don't think a day has gone by where I haven't cried. My Mom started seeing someone about her depression and has asked me to join her. I have never been in to that sort of thing....but haven't dismissed it. I have recently started a scrapbook of my Grandma.....it has helped a little. I still have nightmares and wake in the middle of the night. I am sure it will pass, but it doesn't make it easier. If I can help anyone I will sure try.
Christy | | |
#5203 03-24-2005 12:22 PM | Joined: Nov 2004 Posts: 90 Senior Member (75+ posts) | | Senior Member (75+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2004 Posts: 90 | Dear Christy,
You must have loved your Grandma very much and I am so sorry for your loss. I would really encourage you to go for some grief counseling. When my Mom died 5 year's ago(not of cancer, fortunately of old age) I was devasted. She and I were VERY close, and like you, I would cry every day. I ended up going to a grief counselor for a few months and I can't tell you how much it helped!! Please keep an open heart/mind to it, and if you don't like it you can always stop. Your Grandma will always live on in your heart, and I bet she's your Guardian Angel now, watching over you!
Take care,
Shelley
Caregiver to husband, Ron. Throat cancer, Stage II. No Chemo or Surgery. Completed 35 Radiation Treatments in November 2004.
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