Donna

Don't feel guilty ..you have done soo soo much for your mom . and you too need a break and you need you see your daughters too !

I love WINNIE THE POOH !! I AM SOO Happy you said that ! and Yes The offer still stands I will send you a Copy of it .. I only wish I could send it so you could hear the music ! it just makes it that much more effective. I will get that to you in an email! I am going to send out hard copies on disk as well to those who would like them ..but my aunt is going to try to help me try to get the music on it as well !

Please go enjoy your daughter and Give your Mom my BEST !!!!


Shar

Hi Donna,
I agree with what Sharlee says...............please don't feel guilty. You have been such a fantastic caregiver to your mother, rather than feeling guilty you should be treating yourself to something special.

Love,
Minnie

Hi Minnie,
I just read your update fm the care pages. I wish I could do something to help you.
I came home Friday afternoon by train, sick as a dog. I'm glad I came home, Jackie, my older daughter is sick as well. We went to the doctor together yesterday and were given meds. I seem to be a little better but Jackie is still down.
I haven't seen my mom since Friday afternoon. I'm afraid to be anywhere near her. They are treating me for bacterial, but for all I know it could be viral and the meds may not be helping.
I've called the nurses station once a day, my dad and sister are there at different times. Dad goes 2x's a day. I think Vicki may be spending too much time in there. More to be worried about. I know that there is a website about being around someone who is radioactive, just been to sick to look for it.
Going back to bed.
I made some new friends at HUP the other day...all three patients were head and neck cancers. I told them all about the OCF, I should look to see if they have signed on yet.
It's amazing, we are always over our heads in this area, arent' we?

Minnie--
I'll keep you in my prayers. I know the feeling all to well about the let down of not having the surgery when expected.
Love,
Donna

Hi Donna,

Must be bug season because everyone around me is sick. I ended up spending most of the day and night in the ER getting some IV fluids and getting my fever down. I feel pretty good right now. Tough to get my family to understand that I CAN get just a normal sick like other people......it doesn't always have to have something to do with cancer. So my whole house is sleeping right now and I'm wide awake, enjoying the quiet with my most loyal friend, my dear dog Lucy. She won't leave my side now, she knows something is going on.

Keep us posted on your mom, she's almost done Donna and then it's all uphill!! By Christmas she'll be ready for mistletoe and eggnog.

Love,
Minnie

Donna,

Didn't know you were sick. Left you a voicemail today on your cell. Hope you and Jackie are feeling better and thought that you might see this before you check your cell.

Please get in touch with me tomorrow.

Jerry

i HOPE YOU ALL FEEL BETTER !! I love the FALL but I hate SICK SEASON !!! That is one thing my GP is worried about with me going back to work at a school..with my immune system ( not being at its best ) ...But he told me today I look better then I have in a long time ..then he said actually I LOOK WONERFUL !! Then he said the risk of me gettin sick was outweighed by the benefit of me being mentally better !!!! LOL we will see what he is saying when I am in there sick !!!
I really do hope you all feel better soon I hate being sick

Shar

Hi Guys,
I am feeling much better--thanks. Jerry, I couldn't call you back, i had no voice earlier in the day. Jackie is still feeling down and it seems Jessie is going to take her turn next.
Minnie, I am glad to hear you are feeling better...though, I have to admit I am concerned as your family is, what if we give this to mom?
I know that it doesn't always have to be related to cancer, but for some reason that is the ugly monster thought that first crops up in my mind.
Shar--gotta love a doc telling you how wonderful you look. Attitude aides a lot in healing

My mom is having her implants removed tomorrow. She will hopefully feel much better. I haven't seen her since Friday, and I miss her so much. She called me from her cell phone today, unfortunately I missed her call as the men dropping off her supplies came at the time of her call. I tried calling her back but was unable to reach her. I finally called the nurses desk and her nurse, a great guy from what my dad tells me, went in and told her I was on the phone trying to call her back. She told him she couldn't find her cell phone. I was disappointed and so worried because I knew she would fret over not being able to call me. She does have the hospital phone but she is having a difficult time remembering things...numbers being one of them, I suppose it's the morphine. When she left the message it scared me at first....all she said was "Call me". It sounded so omnious-not her voice at all. I cried for a while. About a half hour after I had called her back my line rang and it was mom. She is so brave. Her mouth is so swollen and sore, and she called to tell me that she really missed me. She cried and told me how much she wants to just come home. She is so lonely. My sister and dad have spent way to much time in that room. My father goes in and holds her and kisses her. I am so afraid to seek out answers about what that could bring. My sister said she has spent too much time in there, mom has touched her at different times. I just don't have the nerve to think about that too hard.
Tomorrow will be so hard on her if they don't release her. I pray that they let her come home with me, she will be so heartbroken, as will I, if they say no. I will understand of course but I know she won't. Did I tell you we were on the phone for 22 minutes? I spoke more than she did, but I left a lot of time open for her to get her thoughts together and her words out. I have found that I have become a much better listener than I have ever been in all my life.
I better get off and go to sleep. Still feeling a bit punk and I have so much cleaning to do prior to bringing her home. You would think after having a cleaning business for a few years I would be better at this, but I just don't have it in me. I hate that I lost almost 4 days to being sick. I wish I had listened to my body whenit was screaming for a break!
Love to all,
D.

Oh, Donna,
Do look after yourself!
Even when you seem to physically recover from a bug, it can leave you feeling low for quite a while--and you were already running on low.

I hope everything goes well for your mom and you can get her home to start healing soon--but not before the docs think she's ready.

Take care of yourself,

Brenda

Thanks Brenda. How are you feeling?

Hi Donna,
At the moment I feel like I'm on a bit of a pendulum--physically, since the blood transfusion, I feel much better--enough energy to do bits of housework and shopping now, not so exhausted walking---so that's all EXCELLENT news.
However, my lip, inside is hurting a lot and feels swollen.

Emotionally---initially relieved that chemo was 'over' so not the constant round of blood tests and infusions and plummeting blood levels.

Again, it's 'however'--back in the loop now of waiting for next 'Review' next week after CT scan yesterday. I feel if there's a new/more lesions, or existing tumours have grown, I might be given a shorter time scale.
I so want to go and see my daughter in California--and am going to do it without insurance, if necessary. Am also going to do it Direct, so no stop-over in Philadelphia, but means I will have to be more careful about DVT/infection etc., but currently FEEL I can handle that.
We have 2 weeks holiday to come, for the first time of being able to afford it and go together because of work, at the end of October, then another week in November.
The doc did clear me to go about a month ago, but now I'm doing the thing we all do which is worrying about this next review on the 4th October, so daren't plan in advance--I know it's crazy, but it does just feel like a see-saw.

Sorry, I've whinged when the rest of you have so many more 'real' issues to deal with, but the 'how I feel' just sort of crystallized tonight!
Hope the day goes good for you and your mom--or as well as can be expected under the circumstances!

brenda