44 yrs old - partial glossectomy (rt side) October 5, 2005. Good margins on three sides - dysplasia on the fourth side. Cat scan of the rt side nodes came back clean. My ENT performed the surgery.

I'm getting a referral to our local cancer center. My biggest concerns at this point are: this cancer (such a scary word) has spread somewhere else and we just don't know it yet. My state of mind is poor...this is probably temporary, but I think it's a combination of things. My mother died of brain cancer in 2002....it was a horrible thing to watch and she put up a good fight...but in the end the cancer won. I have a three year old daughter, I am scared that she will have to grow up without me. She is the love of our lives and my husband is great with her. This is just so difficult on so many levels. I can't seem to snap myself out of the blues.
So glad I found this group. I am not much of a "chatter", but I can't do this alone.

Thanks,
Jenn

Jenn,
I am sorry to hear about your cancer, but am so glad you found the site. It is a wealth of knowledge and compassion in a time when you need both. When you go to your new Doc, may I suggest you voice your concerns and tell him about your Mom. Ask if he will do further CT studies to rule out metastasis (Actually, if he will order it, a head, neck, chest, abdomen and pelvis CT only takes about 10 minutes longer than just one of the above!) This way, your mind will be at ease that you aren't missing something you can treat.
Wishing you the best of luck with this, keep us posted on how things go.

Andrea

Jenn,
I agree with Andrea talk over your concerns with your Doc. That is what they are there for and they now more about this. You have a right to be concerned. You need to be as strong as you can and keep focused on doing what you can for your daughter!! That includes taking care of yourself !!

i hope your doctor will help you ease your fears and we are all here to help.

Take care
Love
Terry

i don't have too much knowledge but can tell you that i had a petscan that took a couple of hours and ruled out any metastacies. i would ask for that. i found once igot on a program i could better deal with the c word. ifinally realized that whatever happens happens and to take every day with my wife and three kids(8,5,and5)as a blessing.i was 40 when diagnosed and it has been a long 10 months since then.but i would not trade some of the experiences i've had for anything.have faith that things will work out and that your family and friends are there for you. also the people at this wonderful site.

Thanks everyone. I think I feel a little better already. Even if I can't stop crying. I appreciate the words of encouragement.

Blessings,
Jenn

Jenn, there will be so many people pulling for you Keep posting and take care of yourself. Amy

Jen-
Sorry that you needed to find us here but the good news is that they have made good progress with this type of cancer in the recent past. So just get yourself into a "GREAT" comprehensive cancer center and kick the cancer's butt! If you are neear Hopkins check into that for an option. Gail Mac's husband just completed treatment there and she had lots of positive experiences. If you need more info I am sure she could help you with getting in there.

On this site you will find all of the info and support you can imagine. Just keep us posted and hang in there. Hopefully you will get throught the treatment quickly and be healthy and strong. Best wishes!
Tami

Jenn:

You'll be fine...Just continue to be strong.

It's totally normal following your surgery and after all you've been through to be weepy.

Up until the 5th, your focus was on deciding what to do and now that you've had the surgery, it all hits you at once.

Anyway, I could be projecting, (since I was SO SO SO depressed and weepy the last couple of weeks), and I hope you know I am not a Dr or professional health care person.

I think you, like me, will feel better soon.

Welcome to the Oral Cancer Foundation Jenn!!

It is the most informative site about oral cancer on the web. Glad you found us but sorry you had to.
Depression is common during and after treatment. Ask your doctor for a script for that. It takes awhile to kick in.
Take the advice of the above posters and go to a Comprehensive Cancer center that sees alot of head and neck cancer. A local cancer center may not have all the tools needed to beat this diaease.
You also want to throw everthing at this the first time. It is a most unforgiving diaease!

Use the search engine at the top of the page to learn all you can about treatment, side effects
etc. The more knowledge you have the better questions you will know to ask your doctors.

Write your questions down ahead of time as we never remember to ask all of them during the doctor visit. If possible take someome with you, it's hard to remember all they tell you when your in a state
of shock.
You can always come here and post any question you can think of. someone with similier treatment will usually respond.

I wish you the best as you start one hell of a journey. Many of us have traveled it and survived and you can to!!

All My Best, Danny Boy

Jenn, you don't have to be chatty.

Please remember breath deep and take one small step at a time. Live each hour at a time. You may be a candidate for radiation therapy which can be very effective with this cancer. State of mind can be really hard to keep rational. For what ever reason our thinking tends to spiral into continually worse projections of the future. You can over time practice getting some control over this kind of thinking. Tears are normal and healthy. You have a lot of options for winning this fight and becoming a better person as a part of the process. Hug those kids (it is a healing thing just to be around them)

Lean on us any time.