literally! i am stuck in houston due to ALEX. it has been raining for 3 days and today is the worst, and of course it is the day i have planned for going back home.
my mom wants to fly home with me for one night and then get in the car with her husband and drive back to houston so they will have a car for the month that she will be here. her treatment should start monday afternoon.

here is my dilemma - already we were not getting back home till 9pm tonight. now my flight has been canceled, but they assure me theyll get us on another flight for tonight. who knows what time we'll get there?! then my mom thnks shell be able to get in the car and drive back here tomorrow - and be in houston by sunday night. shes crazy. i just want her to stay here and wait for her husband but she won't. shes napping right now so she doesnt even know our flights been canceled.

i swear, when life is at its worst, its like everything bad that could happen, WILL HAPPEN. we just cannot get a break!

I guess someone was looking out for us today and knew I needed a BREAK@! Yesterday after gathering some information about local churches that help house families in their apartments, I called around. The social worker at Anderson told me it would be very hard to get in anywhere so soon - we needed Monday. Well after learning my flight was canceled, I called the airline frantically trying to find a new flight. nothing was available, evne on other airlines. And we were supposed to check out of our room in a few hours; we were getting an employee rate thanks to a friend back home.

while all of this is going on, a lady from an organization i applied at online called my stepdad back home in NC (i listed their home phone as a contact). she told him they had something available and he, not knowing at the time our flight was canceled, told her we'll take it, but we wont be checking in till Monday. And she says that is fine but has to start charging rent as of today.

A while later I call my stepdad and tell him we cant get home and have to check out of the hotel and he informs me of the woman thats called! So I give her a call and inform her that we're basically homeless at the mo! She was like an angel. She was in the middle of doing something and dropped everything to meet us at the apartment complex to get us settled in. We're paying only $34 a day for a 2 bedroom fully furnished place. Theres even a pool here! Its so 'homey' andcomfortable. My Mom is already fast asleep in the oversized recliner.

The angel lady called me a little while ago to check in on us. I told her how grateful I was and that I think this all happened for a reason b/c my Mom didnt need to do basically a cross country trip via car back here in 2 days. She went on to tell me that she was thinking the same thing the whole time. She said it is so RARE for a family to get an apartment so soon. She said she had called about 20 families prior to getting to us and nothing was working out; numbers didnt work or people changed plans. She said she knew God wanted her to keep calling b/c she hadnt reached the right family. So she called us today, on a Friday, even though their office is closed on Fridays. And technically, she wouldnt have called us until Tuesday b/c Monday is a holiday.

Everything today happened so fast...I feel like someone is finally taking care of us. I miss my husband so much but I know Im doing the right thing. Now I'll just stay here with Mom in the apartment till my stepdad makes it here.

I guess this thread went from angry and frustrated to joy and relief. Its crazy what a day can do!

I loved reading your post. Finally, you and your mom have gotten a break. Sounds like its the perfect place and very affordable. Things are starting to come together and now your mom can get rest she needs. The weight of the world is now off your shoulders. Go take a nice swim and relax yourself. You done good

Emily,

Well, guess I need to follow my gut because I started a reply to you after your frustrated post to say that, all of the delays and cancellations were probably for a reason and in the God's plan for you. I opted to not post it because I didn't want to sound too preachy/PollyAnna, etc. I just had a feeling that there was a reason for it and that it would work out.

So glad that your angel lady was there to help you in a very scary time and that your Mom does not have to make that trip when her body is so frail.

Hugs, Deb

So glad to read this post. So glad that things worked out. God does work in mysterious wonderful ways.

Emily,

I'm so happy that your "angel" is watching over you and how perfecting things worked out. I agree that your mother really didn't need a long car ride, she needed to rest. I'll continue to pray that her treatment will be as successful.

Emily, reading your post put a BIG smile on my face. Thank God for the "angel lady". Sometimes things do work out. It sounds like you and mom are at a great place. I was worried about your mom's cross country journey. She needs to rest and get strong and that car trip would have been brutal for her. Happy 4th of July! You are an incredible daughter!

thanks guys!! im just doing what i hope anyone would do for their own mother. i know as a teenager, im not sure that i would be able to handle all of this. i probably would have been more disconnected. im thankful that i am capable of doing everything possible to help.

in other news - my stepdad left NC yesterday morning and is now only 2 1/2 hours away!! he stopped at a rest stop last night and slept for about 5 hours and got back on the road. its a 19 hour trip from home. he's a man on a mission!

i also have a blog where ive been documenting our journey, if youd like to follow its at http://erthy-e.tumblr.com/

Things do work out in mysterious ways. I have been following your posts and your mom would have had a very hard time making it back to NC and then just turning around and driving back to TX. The stress would have been unbearable for her. Car rides and ill people do not mix! I'm glad your "angel" came through. Your step-dad did right by taking a "short" break by getting some sleep before continuing. The gas breaks and bathroom breaks don't give you the energy or drive a person needs to get to their destination in "a hurry". I have done a lot of cross country driving during my time and a 5 hour stop at a rest area does wonders.

Linda

I made it home but now am not feeling any better. Apparently Mom started bleeding today, it drained out from an open hole on her cheek.
She called her dr at anderson..he said whatever it is, showed up on her ct scan and hes going to talk with her about it tomorrow. shes going in at 9am.
im very very scared this is something serious and will cause her to not be able to start treatments

Hi Emily- Praying for your Mom and sending good thoughts....

Emily, How is your mom doing today. Been thinking about you both.

Dodie

i just talked to my step dad..she cant do the study. it can cause hemorrhaging so since she bled like that theyre afraid it will happen to her.
so now shes going to do chemo today. shell go back to see them next thursday so they can see how her body is handling it. depending on how she does on the chemo, they could try her on another study. she may come home to finish all of the chemo b/c its once every three weeks.

now i have to pray that this CHEMO saves her. what a shot in the dark. i guess if it sustains her for a few months and shes doing okay, she can get on a different study.

i just give up. i cant believe it. chemo sucks i know its not going to help. sometimes i wish she had just passed away in a car crash or something. this is absolutely awful. just a long slow painful death, and right when i find out im pregnant. im trying so hard to save her and nothing is working

Oh girl. I'm so so sorry. Must have been very dissapointing news to hear. Well. another member here's wife was on Chemo for almost a year an a half and she handled it well. They did some travelling and she was in pretty good health and spirits for awhile. Its all very individual how people's bodies react.... sometimes it can help with shrinking the tumors so she might have less pain. Yes there are certainly side effects to deal with but she could try it and see how she reacts to it.

I'm sure this has all just been a lot to comprehend and deal with on so many levels.. My heart goes out to you Emily. I can only imagine how incredibly difficult this is. My mom had cancer too and it was just very hard... the whole experience all around. I wish there was something that could be done to make things different and to cure her for good. Its just awful to see the person you love so much go through something like this. Well hopefully they can get her symptoms and side effects from this under control soon and her pain under control so she's not uncomfortable.

I know this is an terrible time but maybe somehow during this ordeal you can find some meaningful moments with your mom. Just try and be as positive as you can.Try and relax and just be there for your mom as her treatment continues. You have precious cargo aboard now I wish I had more words of comfort and wish that things could be different.
Sending you guys love.... You mom sounds like a wonderful person.

KATE

Emily, you are a wonderful daughter. Please relax and know that there isnt anything you yourself can do to change this. You have taken her to the best doctors and thats as much as you could do. Never ever beat yourself up over this.

Now its up to her and the doctors on how things will go from here. Im sorry that I dont have more experience with things like this. All we can do is hope and pray that she responds well to the chemo and possibly is able to be in the other trial. The chemo could give her alot more time.

Im so sorry that you didnt have better news. I am saying my prayers for Freida, and you too

Emily,
You are a wonderful daughter and have done all you can do. Do not beat yourself up over this. I will be praying for your mom and family. Please keep us posted on how things are going.

Hi, Emily -
Saving your mother is not your gift to give, but what you are giving is precious. I gave up my husband and kids for a month to be with my mother during her stay in Houston - it was supposed to be 2 weeks, max. No one came to spell me, and I had no guarantees she would return (she did). As I look back, I wouldn't have had it any other way.
You are in my thoughts.

Marlene

Hi Emily- Hope you are doin' OK despite the circumstances. k

Hi Kate, thanks for thinking of me.

things have been quiet the past week. she is extremely tired from the chemo; shes on a combination therapy. i keep telling her its better to be tired than violently ill, right? its hard to really talk to her and get the full story of whats going on over there. or how shes feeling. its like pulling teeth to get answers out of my stepdad as he is a very...lets just say, quiet person.

the day she was scheduled to start chemo, she had to go the ER. her cancer had an infection! she had a fever. they gave her iv antibiotics and saline and kept her overnight. she left ER at 6:30am and had to come back a few hours later for the 6 hour chemo

i emailed her yesterday and told her to check her email and we can communicate better that way. but she never fully joined the computer/email bandwagon so her checking email or using the computer is once in a blue moon.

i just miss her a lot and shes really homesick. last time i talked to her she said she just wanted to get back to some sort of normalcy but i know if she rushes to get home, we'll just wish she was back there where we know shes in good hands. its hard for me to be happy about baby without her here. i have my inlaws and my dad but its not the same. if she were here we'd already be out visiting every baby store in sight but i havent done a thing or gone anywhere. i guess i need to get over that.
we did have our first ultrasound 2 days ago and we heard/saw the little heartbeat! ive had two miscarriages and we never saw the heartbeat with those two - they both ended around 6 weeks. so it was unreal to actually hear that. it was the best thing thats happened in a long time! im estimated at about 7 weeks.

anyway for now im just WAITING (because again, stepdad doesnt call) to hear when her next scan is. i know shes doing lab work on the 20th because she has to lab work before each treatment so i assume shes doing another treatment around the end of the month.

Please hang in there. I know it's hard. My mom had chemo and radiation after her last big surgery. The chemo wore her out but thankfully, she wasn't sick all the time from it. Radiation was much harder on her than the chemo. She came out of it for the better and I'm praying that your mom will too. There are a lot of ups and downs with this stuff - as much as you love your mom and want to make it all good for her, that is not in your hands. You've done a great job as a daughter so keep up the good work. Also, take good care of yourself - you may be having a daughter who'll be just as good as you are!

Nancy T

Emily, Ive also been thinking about you and wondering how you were. I wrote on your FB wall. Thanks for the update on your mom. It must be very difficult for you not to be with her right now. She is in great hands so dont worry. Worrying will never change anything but make you upset, right now you do not need that kind of stress. Do you have any idea how long she will be in Texas?

I wish you the best of luck with your daily challenges. Your first baby is such an exciting time. There is so much to do and plan. Do you have any friends who recently had a baby? They might give you some good advice. There are some excellent books that will give you week by week info and important tips. Especially important is taking the prenatal vitamins. Have you found a good doctor yet? Lots of people will tell you all about their horror stories from being in labor, dont listen!!!! I would tell people as soon as they started telling me their story to save it til after Id had my baby.

Please check in with us and give updates on your mom and on you too

Hey Christine...Im not sure how long she will be there. I think they wanted to do a couple rounds of chemo there to see how its working and maybe send her back home where she can complete it (5 months long). My hope though is they do a couple rounds, its working, and they try her onthe drug therapy. Its so hard to understand whats going on, like I said. I sent her another email today but havent heard back. I just texted her and said CHECK YOUR EMAIL WOMAN. So hopefully she will today - I know she met with the Dr yesterday so she should have some sort of update.

I actually have a friend who is pregnant right now. She used to be my employer - I was her nanny before I started teaching. Now we're really good friends and I still visit with her little girl, Im actually watching her tomorrow! The womans name is Christiane
Im about 10 weeks behind her. She is really smart and has always educated me on how important it is to stay away from toxins in beauty products and eating organic while pregnant. Shes given me a lot of great advice. Im on a whole food prenatal and a prenatal dha.

Anyway hopeuflly Ill hear from my mom today and Ill let you guys know what she says! Thank you for always thinking of me

I finally talked to my mom today. She sleeps SO much now. My stepdad says the chemo has reduced the size of her tumor..its easy to tell because it causes her cheek to protrude. He says its also decreased her pain a lot. What a relief! I was on pins and needles to call..I always assume I dont hear from them b/c its bad news. She hasnt called me because shes just always sleeping. Again, better than being sick, I suppose.

If this can just continue to work and she can start another trial, what a miracle that would be.

Oh Emily, what wonderful news! I'm so glad the chemo is reducing the tumor and decreasing her pain. Hopefully this will continue and she can come home and/or take the new medication. Sure do appreciate the update and will keep you both in thoughts and prayers.

Dodie

Emily, thanks for giving us updates. A big YEA!!!!! Im so happy that the chemo is working and the tumor is shrinking. Glad your mom is more comfortable. Now you can relax knowing your mom is improving

I have an idea for you. Ask your mom to give permission for her doctors and nurses to talk directly with you. She will need to sign a paper for HIPPA privacy rules. This way you can call the doctors office and find out info without bothering your mom or not feeling like you have the whole story from your step dad.

Im so happy you have a close friend who is also pregnant. That will bond you two even more. Nice to hear some good news about both ou and your mom

Great news that the chemo is working on her tumor! Stay calm and as relaxed as you can. Its important for the baby that you take care of yourself and not be too anxious and nervous.

XOXOXOXOX Kate

Hi Emily,

I'm so glad that your Mom is doing well. Sleep is also a great healer so be happy that she is getting plenty of it! I still sleep for up to 12 hours even 7 months post treatment. I hope that she is back home soon and that the two of you can shop up a storm in a month or two!!

Sue

hi ladies! GREAT news today. like, really unexpected.
mom went in for standard lab work she must do prior to the next treatment. after the blood work was done they concluded the chemo is definitely working. she will do another round next wednesday and then they are going to send her home to finish treatments!! shell have four more done here and then they want her to come back - possibly to do the drug therapy.

im just so excited and happy and somewhat relieved. i havent felt genuinely happy in months. im cautious to get so happy but what the hell.
shes so happy she gets to come home and so am i cause i get to go home! taking care of 5 dogs, 1 bird, 1 fish tank, 1 koi pond and clogged up filter, 2 yards to cut, 2 houses to clean is about to kill me!
i also started back work today (was off for summer vacation from teaching) so have been super busy preparing for our kids that come in next week.

hope all is well with everyone else. you guys are the best

Emily, Im so happy to hear your mom is doing so well. Thats the best news Ive heard all day!!!! Yipppeee!!!!

You sure could use a break. So glad to hear your mom will be coming home. Now you can start to return to your normal life. Hope she is feeling good. Chemo can really kick your butt.

Miracles do happen

Awesome news Emily!!!!!!

Great News!!! So glad she is responding to the chemo. Definitely allow yourself to feel happy. Glad your mom is coming home. XOXOXOXO K

christine, she feels okay. shes not nauseous or feeling awful. just VERY tired. and she says she feels disconnected and forgetting things.
she couldnt belive she forgot i went back to work monday (we worked at the same school for a while)

from what ive read here this seems to be something that you dont fully recover from after chemo. is that right?

Hi Emily. I'm so happy to read this update on your mom. I'm so glad the chemo is "working" and that she will be able to come home soon. I don't know if "chemo brain" is permanent but John finished his chemo a year and a half ago and he still has it. Thanks for the update. Hugs to you.

Great news Emily!!! Thanks for keeping us up to date.

I never heard that a patient doesnt ever fully recover from chemo. I know it wasnt easy but it was necessary part of the treatment. My after effects are from radiation.

EmilyE,

The hopeful news is that "chemo brain" is usually temporary. It is long term for only a very small percentage of chemo patients. Hope your mom is in with the majority. Do well.