The past year has been one that I would gladly leave behind. It's been a struggle, one that we're all familiar with..the surgery, healing and then radiation and healing all over again.

I had been thinking that I was finally going to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Despite some lingering problems that I felt were surmountable, I'm ready to go back to work. More importantly, I NEED to go back to work for some closure.

My entire career (thirty plus years) has revolved around managing what I believe is the worlds finest International airport. Yes, I recognize that is a grandiose claim,, but I am proud of our facility and my time there. Retirement was in the not too distant future; date and time to be decided by ME.

After I was diagnosed, it became a significant goal for me to regain my health to a point where I could do my job again, without compromise or accomodation. That would bring my journey full circle...health to cancer, and back to health again. Retirement would soon follow, but I would know that I was healthy enough to do my job again.

I lost that dream today. My Doctors firmly put an end to it...the disability I was left with ( severe drop foot due to the fibula removal) is too severe for me to ever return to work.

I am trying to keep perspective on this. I am cancer free, thank God. I am able to eat without a tube, and I can do most everything I did before cancer, except walk the way I used to. All told, a hugely successful journey, and outcome. One would think that early retirement would be icing on the cake...I wish it felt more like that.

I'm sure that I'm making more of this than it deserves. I'm afraid it's left me badly bummed out. This was not part of the plan!

Rant over
Wayne