Dear Diane,

It is so strange how the human outlook differs. My husband got the peg tube with no problem, but then absolutely REFUSED to use it. Love nor money could make him take the fluids. The day that radiation was over, he made the surgeon remove it. (In the long run, he lost 40 lbs.)

Then he got news after his first scans that he had a spot on his lung. He made me promise that I would not, under any circumstances, let them put the feeding tube back in. I reluctantly said ok.

After hearing that the lobectomy was benign, I ran into his room! I hugged him, so damn happy that this was not a met. He didn't even register what I said. And really hasn't to this day. I think it is more of a survival instinct. "Ok, I never knew I had cancer in the first place....how can you come in and convince me that it's over?"

Hold him tight and let him know that you are there. They are under so much stress at this time that I don't think they acknowledge much at all that is happening. They are dealing with so much emotionally. But, if my husband pulled through, I know yours will too.

It takes time, and I know that's a hard thing to hear right now. But, so true.

Love,
Mandi