Gary,

I have the same "liquid food" memories as you -- I couldn't deal with Ensure, but lived on Carnation Instant Breakfast (other than strawberry)!

Barb,

The "silent screaming" thing also took me back years. There were times toward the end of radiation when I wanted to do a blood-curdling scream at the radiation center, but since I wasn't hearing them from anyone else there, I held it in. I also held it in at work, for obvious reasons. But when I got home, I had to let it out - it was part pain, part frustration. Every time I told my RO I couldn't take any more, he told me I could and I needed to.

I pray that you'll have the strength it takes to get through this last part of your treatment -- I know it's tough, but we're here for you.

Cathy