Rosie ,
I am also highly impacted by your post. Being angry is very normal and whether we are caregivers or cancer victim it goes with the process.But the guilt has to go YOU WERE NOT ALONE in decision making. Heather was a part of this process and any doctor would have blown your input out the window if they thought it made a difference in saving Heather's life. I think and hope someday you will too that somewhere along the way they were grasping at straws.They knew the gravity of her situation and once you go experimental treatment It's a crap shoot or it wouldn't be experimental.At some point Heather would have told you That's enough whatever way she could.Where was your granddaughters father in all this? If he was out of the picture Sorry I asked. You are on hell of a mother for everything you did for Heather and I'm sure she's looking down at you now and wanting to give you a good swift boot for felling guilty. When you get that way try to feel her love for you. Anger is ok but the guilt has got to go. As far as a different hospital goes I don't think it would have mattered all oncology drs refer to other drs if they need recommendations . Please take care of yourself and every so often pat yourself on the back . You deserve it . You showed Heather more love in the time of her need than most people get in a lifetime.

Diane