Hi G,

I was exactly where you are one year ago today. I was facing oral surgery, free flap graft and neck dissection. I did not fit into any of the groups either (no drinking, chewing, smoking or HPV), but I had bitten myself while eating and that is where the cancer developed over 3-4 years. It just never healed right and became SCC.

I read everything I could about my situation and what to expect. I also read about the things others had gone through (you will find your best resources here on this site) and it helped temper my own anxiety. Things could be worse. I thought I was going to get through with just surgery and no radiation or chemo, but my cancer was a bit more advanced than they thought (you can only really tell once they get in there and do frozen slides under a microscope), so I was staged at 3, no nodes or metastases and scheduled for radiation and chemo light (3-5 sessions). Needless to say, I wasn't thrilled at the prospect after having read and researched everything. I knew I probably needed a GI tube, so accepted when they suggested it. Placement of that was far more painful than any other part of the surgery, and it was a general pain in the butt dealing with it, but I am glad I got it and knew I would probably not have survived so well had I not gotten it.

Not sure how far along you are, but once you get all your scans done, get a second opinion - I didn't want to do that, but it confirmed everything my (fabulous) docs had planned for me.

If you are confused and scared - ask questions of anyone here. You will find kindness and answers, plenty who have been there and back and lived to tell the tale. Most of us are happy to share our experiences and hopefully provide helpful info.

I had thyroid issues (hereditary) prior to my diagnosis and after 8 weeks of radiation I am in watch and wait mode for however long it takes for changes to show up. Its part of the process. I know therefore I am prepared. Hopefully.

This will sound strange, but I have found many things to laugh at and be very thankful for though out this process. There have been hiccups for sure, but in many respects this experience hit my 're-set button' and enabled me to see my life and the world from a new perspective.

PS - after less than a year (surgery was in Feb) I can honestly say I feel better and am healthier than I was going into it. It has been a LONG process, and I still have some limitations (taste, truismus, nerve issues, can't yawn). Rads are tough but you will get better, and its better if you keep your nutrition up before, during and after (great resources here).

Thoughts and prayers your way

H