Hello MandaRe, I too am sorry that you need to be here. That said , this site is a wonderful resource and place to come to for advice and support. Even words of comfort.
You must still be reeling from this diagnosis and suggested treatment.
I am glad to hear that you are seeking a second opinion. This will be important for you to know that you have sought out the best treatment options for you. I will be thinking of you tomorrow.
Should MSKCC suggest the same treatment option, a Total Glossectomy, we will be here for you. There are some of us who have been through this. Sometimes, in order to save a life, extreme treatment is the only option. Don't get too hung up on living without a tongue. There is still great life to be had. Great life.
Tammy

Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis
DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT.
PET 6/11 clear.
R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED
Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in.
March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!