Greetings everyone.


Whining about myself is not something I usually do. I know that no one here can guarantee me that there is nothing wrong with me or something like that, but i just need to talk to someone about this because it really got me worried.

For the past 12 days I've been experiencing throat pain and some ear discomfort (pressure/fullness and sometimes very mild pain), accompanied by a deeper and hoarse voice. There are also some small and painless red bumps (soft to the touch) at the back of my tongue (on the side of my tongue) and a lump in my throat. Last year, I was diagnosed with leukoplakia (mouth floor, on the left side). I've been smoking since 23 (I'm now 28). About 9 months ago, I reduced tobacco consumption to 10 cigarettes per day (compared to 15-18 cigarettes before). Like I said, the troubles started 12 days ago. It's now the main exam period at the university (lasting from early June to early July), so tobacco consumption went back up to 15-18 cigarettes per day. Until two days ago that is. That is when I became so worked up, because I noticed that my leukoplakipa patch became whiter an rougher (not painful). The area around it is slightly red (with red veins visible), but that's how it's been for the past year and a half (the area around leukoplakia that is). It got me so worried that I reduced tobacco consumption to 3 cigarettes yesterday, 2 cigarettes today and finally stopping tomorrow. The specialist will be in on Wednesday and the checkup will probably not happen until sometime next week. In the meantime, I'm a bundle of nerves How can I keep my mind of it until then and focus on studying? I don't fear death, but I feel annoyed and guilty for not trying to do something about it.

A bit about me (you can skip this part if you like).
28 years old. Been having a poor lifestyle ever since I started studying. I'm also allergic to a bunch of things. At 22 I was diagnosed with hiatal hernia. From that point on, everything started going downhill. I became really depressed. Anxiety kicked in. Failed a lot of exams witch increased my depression and anxiety even more. Except for my family and my mare, there is no more joy in my life. Haven't paid too much attention to my health until 5 months ago when I started exercising and mountain hiking . We have a family business that puts a lot of pressure on me. Because of all those things I have a really stressful and unhappy life. Additional stress and worrying came when they told us that we have to complete our studies and diploma (the old uni program will be replaced with a new one) until September 2016. That means if I don't pass the remaining 5 exams and write a diploma, everything will become useless and I'd have to start from the beginning.


To anyone that reads this rant of mine: Thank you for you time.


P.S.: I apologize for my terrible English.