I wasn't the patient in my connection with OC - it was my brother, but he and his wife have 4 kids - 3 to 13 years, plus, (inexplicably) they've just bought a new puppy - so I'd hazard a guess that their sex life is a bit average at the moment anyway, notwithstanding OC.

As far as intimacy goes, can you move a single bed into the bedroom with your hubby, so at least you're in the same room. Are you in separate rooms because you move about at night and keep him awake, or because you need the separate bed? What about 2 single beds and ear plugs and those airline night patch thingies for him if he needs to sleep and you're tossing and turning? If it were me, I'd try to stay in the same room - too easy to become comfortable in your own private space.

Not sure about the safety aspect of sex for you, but I'd certainly ask your doctor. I also think even if intercourse isn't comfortable for you, surely at least some level of sexual activity would be OK?

Best of luck with it, Pepper. It's a very important issue in your emotional healing from all the trauma you've experienced with OC.