Jim - you are one very special guy - and you've brought many smiles to the rest of us. I like what you said about coming out smiling "or pretending to be" because if you can pretend for long enough, you begin to feel it and believe it. One of my favorite books to read to my children when they were little, was "The Little Engine that Could" with the words: "I think I can, I think I can. . . " and pretty soon that little engine DID get over the mountain!
RandysSister - My son, did not like for people to say, "Well, it could be worst!" But he did enjoy company. As his big sister, maybe you could ask him to make a list of anything he might need or enjoy and let people who come to see him know. My son enjoyed playing video games with someone, and really appreciated it when one of his friends brought him a new video game. It helped to bring him up a notch from being depressed or thinking dark thoughts. One of the first times my son smiled was when I took him to see a funny movie. I think it reminded him of his own sense of humor.
Bloop - you really brought up something I hadn't thought of and so important about not eating in front of someone who couldn't! It's true, there are so many other things to do that are important when getting together with family or friends.