Sue,

The statistics on divorce in conjunction with cancer treatment are actually quite shocking...especially when it is the woman that has been diagnosed with cancer. A study done by a Dr. Chamberlain of the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance showed that a woman is 6 times more likely to become seperated or divorced then if a man were the patient.

Of course studies are studies and statistics don't make anyone feel better at all, but it shows trends in the differences between men and women when put in the caregiver's role...which in my opinion (and several others on these boards) is the hardest job on the planet.

It's not an excuse for an affair, however anyone going through emotional distress like that are more likely to reach out and try to take a break from reality for a while...does it make it right? No but it's a reason.

My wife and I have been together for 15 years, married for ten. Two years into our marriage I get a call from a friend informing me that my wife had had an affair and he felt I needed to know. I was crushed to say the least and it literally took years for me to heal emotionally and mentally from that blow...but I'm sure glad that my wife and I found a way to work through it. She is my best friend and after a time, I was able to understand her reasoning for doing what she did and was able to forgive her for it, as she's been able to forgive me of all the crap I've put her through emotionally over the years.

Personally, I believe that since we were able to make it through that time, we can handle anything that comes our way...even when I got sick. My wife is the best friend I've ever known, the closest person to me and my rock...so there is forgiveness and life after an affair if you are willing.

Keep your chin up,

Eric