I'm a 56 year old male. Last night, my wife was diagnosed with cancer of the gum area of her mouth. We are waiting for her primary care doc to call this morning. We have no idea what to expect. It's a sad and scary time.

Welcome to OCF. Im sorry you have to go thru this. Luckily you have found the best site for information and support to help you thru this. Treatments arent easy but they can be done successfully.

Please take a minute to update your profile with any current info you have to help us to get to know you better. This makes it easier to answer your questions. One important thing to remember about oral cancer is that everybody here is different. Their cancers are in different places in their mouths, different treatments and reactions.

You will very soon have a whirlwind of appointments. It will seem like you are always running to the doctors. Make sure you have your wife seen at a comprehensive cancer center. This way all the doctors are on the same page and they discuss the casse together. Its more beneficial to the patient.

How was your wife diagnosed? Was a biopsy done? If so, who did it?

To prepare for this, please tell your wife dont worry about gaining weight. Eat like crazy everything now, have no regrets!!! Once she begins treatments her mouth with change and eating will become a chore.

Best of luck with everything.

Hi Christine,

Thanks for the reply. She had an irritation in her lower gums,that looked like an infection. They tried antibiotics, then an oral surgeon did a biopsy. He called last night with the news.We are near Boston,Ma hospitals and she has a fantastic doctor so I'm confident she'll get the best care. She has a positive attitude.

Caperman,

It never hurts to get another opinion or two with this cancer. Check out this:

http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/resources/cancer_centers.htm

Hi David,

Thanks for the input. We will know more on Monday. It's inspiring to see your situation and positive outlook.

Sorry you needed to come here but, welcome. As to what to expect, depending on stage of cancer and whether it's spread, it could be anything from surgical removal (best case) to that plus radiation/chemo to, if it's spread to the nodes, all of the above plus neck surgery. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. As Christine said, if rad/chemo are in the offing, have her eat everything she ever wanted. Even though I've been battling high blood pressure for years, my doc still said I should eat burgers and fries and all that stuff. Beat of luck to your DW. With lots of support from her family, she'll beat this thing.

Hi Deejer47,

Thanks for the info. I'm feeling much better reading the posts. It's comforting to know that you and others survived this ordeal and are helping others.Wife and I had a good long talk today. We'll get through this.

Caperman.. welcomr to out home away from home.Sorry you had to come but its the best place in the world when needed and seeking advice. Some of us have been thru hell like maybe fighting a couple to 3 wars. Some have had it easier and some just never know. Anything you need to know after your wife starts treatment will get answered. We have alot of knowledgeable people all are nice even when they sound out of touch, There is usually a reason for that and it's called OC, Again, welcome with us.

Thanks EZ Jim,

Comforting words help in this emotional time.

Hi, Welcome to OCF and sorry to here about your wife!! The Boston area has one of the best CCC anywhere (Dana Faber). Make sure that she is treated at a CCC if at all possible. I was treated at Norris Cotton CC here in Nortern New England and am now 18 months post TX and doing fine. This fight will not be easy at any level but can be won. Listen to your treatment team and ask all and sny questions that you both have. One idea is to write douwn all questions and take plenty of notes when speaking to the team of Doctors you are assigned. Well good luck and GOD speed to both of you!!! Semper-Fi Bob

Hi Caperman,

As scary as your wife's diagnosis is, I'm glad it was so straightforward. I also had what looked like an irritation on my lower gum and had a lot of detours before I got to a definitive diagnosis.

After all was said & done, I was lucky - surgery was all I needed. My ent removed 5 teeth and a chunk of my jaw. It took place June 17, 2008. So far so good. (I see my ent this month.)

You've come to the right place for answers and support.
When you find out what your wife's doctor is planning, you'll be able ask the right questions. In the meantime, hang in there.

Good luck!

Marlene

Hi Bob,
Thanks for the post. Posts like yours help us get though the emotional impact of the diagnosis. We'll find out more this week, and Dana Farber is on our radar. I'll take plenty of notes, as per your suggestion. After examining the OCF site, I see how good information is critical to the curing process.

Hi Marlene,

Thanks for the post.Your situation sounds similar to my wife's. Once we get into the true diagnosis, I'll let you know about her situation and treatment. Stories like yours, although involving surgery, provide a positive angle to our situation.

Hi all,

Wife will have surgery for squamus cell tumor in lower gum. Doc says we found it in time. They say 7-10 days in the hospital with some bone removal. Surgical site will be filled with bone from leg.
She will have radiation after bone heals. God willing she'll be OK

Thanks again to the posters who helped me, her husband, get through the first three days after diagnosis. It was a very trying time for both of us

Sounds like your wifes treatment is all planned out. That should be a relief for both of you. Its not easy to believe but it really will be ok. The unknown is always something most people fear.

If your wife is able to, at this point have her eat all her favorite meals now. It will be a while after her treatments before she will be able to eat properly.

Have the doctors discussed chemo? How about a feeding tube? Is she being treated at a cancer center?

Most likely she will also have chemo along with the radiation. She will need you as her Caregiver as none of us that underwent any of this Tx could have done it without our Caregiver. It is an important job and I can see that you will be a great one.

Each of us can respond differently to the same surgery and Tx but it is usually a tough period, although relatively short in duration in the grand scheme of things. The radiation will cause her to loose her taste and (therefore) loose weight so we always tell others that they should eat all their favorite foods without regard to health concerns now before Tx begins. She will recover from all of this but it may take a year or 2 so take advantage of this once in a lifetime opportunity to eat without guilt.

Hope all goes well in the comming months ahead. She will be more depent on you during her treatment and recovery. If times get tough and you need to vent use this forum and you can also PM me as I am just up the road in Vermont. Best of luck.. Semper-Fi Bob

Yes it might take the 2 years. I have 2 yrs in less than 2 months and i am in no way ready for real food .. Damn corn season is coming up again quick too, GRRRRRRRRRRRRR That is one thing besides a big rare steak that I miss. But I am alive and mouthy so tht's what really counts.

I am glad that Drs think they found this stuff in time. I know it is scary. I am just now beginning my journey as well. Have not been told if I will need rads or chemo at this point. My ENT has decided to do a PET scan first. Like your wife, I was told mine was juat a sore and given antibiotics first. Since it was not getting better my ENT decided to just remove whatever it was. I will praying for you and your wife. I know how scary this all must be for you all.

Hi Caperman,

I'm happy to hear they think they found it in time, that is wonderful. I suggest telling your wife about this site. As a patient, it helped me more than I can express in words. When treatment begins sometimes you really need to talk to people who have gone through it. My husband is my best friend and I could not have done it without him but I needed the people here to.

I hope you continue to post and let us know how she is doing.

Hi Christine,

We met with two surgeons at Mass General Hospital. The plan is to MRI her this week, with surgery the following week.They will remove the cancerous gum area and replace it with a leg bone fragment. She has been under intensive doctor supervision over another, unrelated med problem so the diagnosis was quick. Follow up radiation only at this point.
She's handling it well, considering the situation. Everyone has been supportive. Thanks

Hi davidcpa,

I'm feeding her plenty of high cal food, and she is enjoying her caloric freedom. I'm in it for the long haul--I've been with her for thirty three years.Doc's mentioned radiation only at this point but it's all subject to change

Hi Bob,

Thanks for the support. I went through a series of emotions after her diagnosis that involved the worst thought imaginable. With the support of posts like yours we'll beat this bad thing

Hi EzJim,

Interesting point about the ability to eat food. I didn't ask about the food after surgery but I'm sure we'll find out soon about this.

Hi walknlite,

Your situation sounds very similar to hers. The docs seem optimistic, especially with the early diagnosis. She's still somewhat timid about talking or blogging about the situation but after the surgery I'll ask her to sign in and meet all you wonderful people who have provided so much comfort during this trying time. God bless.

Hi Suzanne98,

Thanks for the comments. I agree that this site provides an amazing amount of support. A week ago today I was going through some tough times and this site really helped me, and her out.I'm sure she will introduce herself to all of you who took the time to post.