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#46635 04-06-2006 12:52 AM
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He's made it to the last 2 weeks and now he wants to quit. I've tried saying everything I can think of, what to do? The onc tried encouraging him, the radiologists was no help, saying she can't make him. He told me mentally he has nothing left. One day it's the vomiting thats so bad the next day it's the pain. He's getting about 1,500 cal a day with his feeding tube, he's on 100mg patch. We're going now to get IV from oncology.

#46636 04-06-2006 01:35 AM
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Hi Deborah,

The last two weeks are the hardest but I think maybe the most important. I wanted to quit too, but hung in there and he must also. Would they give him some morphine? I had as much as I wanted and it really helped with the pain.

Handling the pain is the toughest. Tell him quitting is not the answer and we all must complete the regimine.

Good luck,

Steve Daib


SCC, base of tongue, 2 lymph nodes, stage 3/4. 35 X's IMRT radiation, chemo: Cisplatin x 2, 5FU x2, & Taxol x2. Hooray, after 3 years I'm in still in remission.
#46637 04-06-2006 03:20 AM
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Deborah,

My father has been saying the same thing but Monday he went to his ENT for the 6 week check and the ENT did a good job of explaining cancer cells in simple terms or maybe for once my father just decided to listen to him. Whatever the case it bought us at least another week of getting him to continue radiation. He told my father that cancer cells have four stages and radiation treats these cells at stage 3 if you skip a week or quit early these cells may have time to go to stage 4 and will not be killed by the radiation because they were able to have time to make it to stage 4. It might be worth a shot - I know it is hard but I also agree with Steve try different or more pain meds and as I keep telling my father - it won't last forever there is an end to the treatments and it will eventually get better.
Hang in there!


Caregiver to Father:Stage III unknown primary; modified left side neck dissection 2/2006; 8 wk trmts of Erbitux 3/2006 with-37 radition treatments; 11.2010; biopsy of base of tongue results questionable. 9.2013 tumor on left side of tongue; squamous cell cancer. 10.2.2013 Hemiglossectomy(1/2 tongue removed) with reconstruct tongue using left thigh tissue;surgery included IORT.
25 additional IMRT radiation trtmts & 5 wks/chemo. Carbo & Taxol combo.NPO;100% PEG depend;aspiration pneumonia 3/2014
#46638 04-06-2006 11:45 AM
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You might try reversing you psychological approach. What would Jesus/God want you to do? Guilt of abandonment of chidren. All good approaches....
Darrell


Stage 3, T3,N1,M0,SCC, Base of Tongue. No Surgery, Radiationx39, Chemo, Taxol & Carboplatin Weekly 8 Treatments 2004. Age 60. Recurrence 2/06, SCC, Chest & Neck (Sub clavean), Remission 8/06. Recurrence SCC 12/10/06 Chest.
#46639 04-06-2006 02:35 PM
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Hi Deborah. I don't know if your husband has any anti-anxiety or anti-depression medicine prescribed, but if not, I would highly recommend it. My husband had Ativan and Xanax at his disposal for anxiety, which he would take at night to help him sleep and sometimes during the day, particularly before radiation. He started taking Zoloft (50 mg. at bedtime) about halfway through treatment at the suggestion of our RO, and that really helped. The Zoloft doesn't take 2-3 weeks before it begins working, like some anti-depressants. I saw a difference in about 1 week. My husband's attitude definitely improved. I hope you can get him to reconsider. I wish you the best.

Michele


Michele, caregiver to husband, Jesse, SCC diagnosed 1/5/06 unknown primary, lf neck mass >6 cm. Chemo (Cisplatin 2x; Carboplatin & Taxol 2x) & XRT radiation 39X ending 4/4/06. Rad neck dissection 8.5 hrs 4/13/06. 30 HBO treatments Fall 2006.
#46640 04-06-2006 03:32 PM
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Deborah,
He has to make a choice whether he wants to live or not. My oncologist told me that, in his experience, patients who did not complete treatment had very poor survival rates.

Michele's advice is very solid - talk to your oncologist immediately about this. Forget the radiologist or the RO - this is an MO issue -he should managing all of the meds.

Your breaking the rules (again) Darrell - you have been told before that unless the original poster brings up the subject of religion, God or Jesus, then we can't (See Romans 13:1-7). You really think that guilt or shame is a good approach - thank God you're not in counseling.


Gary Allsebrook
***********************************
Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2
Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy)
________________________________________________________
"You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
#46641 04-06-2006 03:35 PM
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This is very hard stuff to deal with Deb. I've got my fingers crossed for both of you. Keep talking to him. Amy


CGtoJohn:SCC Flr of Mouth.Dx 3\05. Surg.4\05.T3NOMO.IMRTx30. Recur Dx 1\06.Surg 2\06. Chemo: 4 Cycles of Carbo\Taxol:on Erbitux for 7 mo. Lost our battle 2-23-07- But not the will to fight this disease

:
#46642 04-06-2006 08:01 PM
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Amy is correct. Sharing your feelings is perfectly ok.

The last couple of weeks in Tx and a few weeks post Tx is the worst. Five weeks total and he should be out of the woods. I was sick a lot too, just like him, but I have too much to live for and I was determined that I wouldn't let the treatment kill me. I didn't even have a PEG.

Let him know that we have been in his shoes and we are all pulling for him.


Gary Allsebrook
***********************************
Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2
Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy)
________________________________________________________
"You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
#46643 04-07-2006 01:20 PM
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Deborah
I hope for all of your sakes he has change of heart.
This is a terrible and tough time in his treatment , we are all pulling for you.

I live in Lawrenceville, would you like to talk?
678-377-7992
Marica


Caregiver to husband Pete, Dx 4/03 SCC Base of Tongue Stage IV. Chemo /Rad no surgery. Treatment finished 8/03. Doing great!
#46644 04-07-2006 01:40 PM
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thank you all so much for your support and your suggesstions. We made it thru the week, he took one day off, that amount of rest seemed to really help and the vomiting is more under control now. They started him on the liquid oxycodone in the tube every 4 hrs, so the pain is better. He said he felt he was spinning out of control, he's promised to continue to try. Our son is home from college this weekend and that seemed to lift his spirits and it certainly helps me physically to share the load a little. Marica thank you for reaching out, if you don't mind I will call this weekend, I'm just too tired tonight.

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