Every time I read about someone's recurrence, or some of the terrible side effects they are having, it affects me deeply. I mourn deeply the people that have been lost. Sometimes I too have to stay away for a little while... but as others have said, I also feel like this is the only place where people really DO understand the fears, the tears, and sometimes if we are lucky, the wonderful feeling of relief that a negative test or passing a milestone give us....while at the same time feeling sad for others not so lucky.