Amber, welcome to the site. Sorry you had to find us, we will help you and your dad as much as possible. I had tonsil cancer as well which moved to my lymph nodes as well. That's how I first found the cancer, while shaving. My lymph node was only 3.1 cm, though, so your dad is a little ahead of me. My treatment plan was to have radiation with chemo first, then surgery after that in the hopes that rad/chemo would shrink the tumor enough to make the surgery much easier due to the reduced size of the tumor. This was after a tonsilectomy in which the primary cancer site was found by the pathologist who examined the tonsils after removal. This treatment plan worked well for me as after the radical neck dissection, I was found to be free of cancer, even the tumor in my lymph node. Cancer free is a good feeling, and your dad could get the same result.

During the treatments, I had the feeding tube, also known as a peg, inserted. I don't think rad should be administered without the peg. I lost 50 pounds, 25% of my body weight, even with a tube. It got so I couldn't swallow my own saliva due to the rad treatment, so a peg was absolutely essential for me.

I also was not interested in learning anything about the treatment for this disease. I felt I could get through anything I had to, but the anticipation of knowing what to expect would cause me to deal worse with what was coming as I would anticipate the worst. So I didn't even let my saintly wife tell me anything about the treatment and didn't start looking at this site until after the treatments ended. That was before surgery, but I had had other surgeries and knew what was coming, so I didn't worry about knowing what was coming.

As far as insurance and dental goes, my medical insurance paid for all of my dental that was needed for the treatments, including periodontal cleaning, two extractions, iodine trays for after treatment issues, and they have authorized over $11,000 for dental bridges which I will start on after Christmas. So talk with your insurance and they may help you out.

Will pray for your dad, you, your mom and the rest of your family. Tell dad that he can get through this. Its a major pain in the back, or lower, but just keep a good attitude and he can beat it.