Ingeborg, you brought back so many memories. Martin was irrate then impatient but as he got weaker through treatment he went very quiet, too quiet. it was even worse than him being angry. It took him ages before he accepted the tube. he was so thin but kept refusing it. He says now looking back he was trying to pretend all was fine. admitting he needed the tube was admitting failure towards the cancer, as absurd as it seems. He wishes the dietician had forced him to use it. Maybe you can ask a nurse to talk him into using the PEG and show him how to use it, or you can learn and feed him. I had when Martin was at his worse.
It's a tough job being a care giver but try and be strong, vent here and have some you time outside. If I am right it's summer in your part of the world? Is there anyone there to help you look after the kids while they are on their summer holiday?
Just keep strong.
Cecilia