| | Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 216 Gold Member (200+ posts) |  Gold Member (200+ posts)
Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 216 | Good for you kiddo! You ARE tougher than you think....being proactive is the first step. My husband and I have 7 kids between us...all between the ages of 26 and 36. Some are actively helping out, some are dealing with this thru phone calls and emails. It's a tough situation and you will find your way 
CG to H with SCC BOT T4N2cM0 dx 12/19/08, teeth removed pre-tx; Erbitux & RT-done 3/12/09, PEG 2/9/09-7/14/09; ND 6/16. Pet 6/12-no mets except lymph node in neck removed on 6/16. Chyle leak,2nd surg to repair. Dilate esophagus 4/15/10. Clear PET 12/17/10
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2008 Posts: 475 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | | Platinum Member (300+ posts)
Joined: Jun 2008 Posts: 475 | Hi Colleen,
I know how hard it is to see somone you love in that position. It is one of the most difficult things I had to deal with as well with my brother. It did take me a little bit to get used to all the caring procedures, but as Suzanne said, you need to continue to talk to her and make her feel like a person. She needs to see you because she needs to know you are ok too. She is worrying about her family just as much as you are worrying about her.
I know you will get over this, but hang in there.
Susan Lauria - OCF Director of Events - Always looking for volunteers to help spread the word about early detection! Contact me if you can help!
*Brother passed away from tongue cancer in 2006 at age 47, was co-caregiver, he was non-smoker/casual drinker
LETS MAKE ORAL CANCER HISTORY!
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | I don't want to sound harsh or blunt but stop thinking about you and start thinking about your Mom. She's the one that needs you and she needs you now.
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
| | | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 | Hi Sweetie- I think you are just scared and overwhelmed and understandably so. This is a lot to handle for anyone especially someone so young and carefree. My Mom was very sick at just your age and it was so hard. I wanted to be carefree and jus didn't want to have to deal with it even though I of course also didn't want my mom to be sick or go through what she was going through either.
Thinking of you and I'm here to support you during this difficult time! She will feel your love however much you are there for her.
Take Care and be strong.
KATE
Tongue Cancer T2 N0 M0 /
Total Glossectomy Due to Location of Tumor
Finished all treatments May 25 2007
Surviving!!!
| | | | | Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 113 Senior Member (100+ posts) | | Senior Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2008 Posts: 113 | David. Naturally I see your posts everyday. I admire one thing about you. You shoot straight from the hip. We never have to read between the lines. You just say whatever you have to say no matter what it is. By the way, I am complimenting you, seriously..........!!!!!!!!! Claudia
Husband 2/3 tongue removed March 2008. Free flap. . Stage IV. Radiation and 3 chemo's (cisplatin,taxol & erbitux). .Pet scan Aug 08 showed mets to lungs .Oct 08, recurrence. - In the arms of Jesus, July 15, 2009
| | | | | Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 | I'm pretty blunt in my life and I agree with David. I know what anxiety is like and it STINKS. I know you can't imagine yourself going there without a panic attack or something like it but YOU CAN. Once you do it, you will be so proud of yourself and then everytime it will be easier. I promise...this is true.
Suzanne
***********
T1 SCC on right side of tongue
Age 31...27 when diagnosed
4 partial glossectomies
No chemo or radiation
Biopsy on 2/2/10-Clear
Surgery needed again...no later than April 2011
Loving life and just became a mother on 11/25/10
It's not what we CAN'T do..it's what we CAN do:)
| | | | | Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 794 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 794 | Hi Colleen,
I hope this finds you feeling stronger. I appreciate your fears, and I think you are stronger than you have recognized-just being able to admit your fears is a huge step. I think once you start going you will feel more secure about spending time with your mom again. Please know that you are all in my thoughts.
Where are you in PA? I am in Bucks County.
Donna
Last edited by Donnarose; 03-16-2009 08:19 PM.
Donna
CG to Mom, dx 4/25/07 with tongue cancer,T3N0,tx began 7/6/07, 31 tx's of IMRT, 8 cycles of Erbitux. Brachytherapy, surgery, left neck dissection and temp trach placed all on 9/17/07, trach removed 10/17/07. ORN of jaw, late effect of radiation symptoms. **lost my beautiful mother on 5/5/11.
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 | Colleen: Just wondering about how and how you were making out. Were you feeling better about spending time with your mom? We all hope so, and I pray for your strength.
Donna
Donna,69, SCC L Tongue T2N1MO Stg IV 4/04 w/partial gloss;32 radtx; T2N2M0 Stg IV; R tongue-2nd partial gloss w/graft 10/07; 30 radtx/2 cispl 2/08. 3rd Oral Cancer surgery 1/22 - Stage 1. 2022 surgery eliminated swallowing and bottom left jaw. Now a “Tubie for Life”.no food envy - Thank God! Surviving isn't easy!!!! .Proudly Canadian - YES, UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE IS WONDERFUL! (Not perfect but definitely WONDERFUL)
| | | | | Joined: Mar 2009 Posts: 48 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | | OP Contributing Member (25+ posts)
Joined: Mar 2009 Posts: 48 | I am starting to feel a bit better. My mom and I exchanged text messages about what was going on inside of our heads. She told me not to beat myself up and that she understands what I am going through. It made me a little less tense. I am going over there tomorrow night. Thank you all!
26
Mom 48 diagnosed Sep 08 Stage IV SCC
full glossectomy, neck dissection traech and peg Nov 08
35 radiation treatments and 3 chemo
Mar 09 mets to lungs
Started Erbitux 3/09/09
06/26/09 mets to rib
Stopped Erbitux 6/26/09
Start erbitux/taxol 7/06/09
Started Hospice 7/24/09
Passed away 8/09/09
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 | Good for you Colleen. Hug her tight and cherish that moment. Enjoy your time together and we look forward to hearing how it went.
Donna
Donna,69, SCC L Tongue T2N1MO Stg IV 4/04 w/partial gloss;32 radtx; T2N2M0 Stg IV; R tongue-2nd partial gloss w/graft 10/07; 30 radtx/2 cispl 2/08. 3rd Oral Cancer surgery 1/22 - Stage 1. 2022 surgery eliminated swallowing and bottom left jaw. Now a “Tubie for Life”.no food envy - Thank God! Surviving isn't easy!!!! .Proudly Canadian - YES, UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE IS WONDERFUL! (Not perfect but definitely WONDERFUL)
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