trt,

Are you taking anything for depression?

You are right. I don't know how to get out of that. I have read many books and tried many things. My negative voice is very strong and I am very easily pushed into negative territory. The fatigue/constant illness and weakness make it harder. I don't handle illness very well even when it's minor. I don't deal with loss/grief very well. A lot of trouble accepting the loss of physical ability etc. I think I may be genetically predisposed as my parents are similar. My mother is pretty depressed.

[quote=suzanne98]TRT,

When I read your posts I notice they have an "unhappy" tone. I'm sure what I'm going to say is nothing you have not heard before but...our minds are very powerful. If you keep referring to yourself as "low energy" "exhausted" " such an effort to talk to people" all of these things will remain the same in your life.

In the past I always blew people who talked like I am now. However, I truly believe it now. If we tell ourselves we can do somethnig, regardless if it is mental or physical we can do it. Do you like to read? There are so many good books out there on the power of the mind.

I know you have tried therapists but we also have to look at ourselves at times like this. You should try to reach within and get your strength from that. Take baby steps..remember, one day at a time. I have told you my story so you know I have gone through some hard times. My aunt and I emailed all day sometimes just to get me through the work day. I will be that person for you. I know you can do it...I'm here for you. I wold love to see you get past this.

As always, let me know what I can do. [/quote]

I take Lexapro. Provigil for energy (without this I'd have even less energy). I think it helps a little.
I've tried others but usually they have some side effect that makes me worse like making me sleepy.

[quote=davidcpa]trt,

Are you taking anything for depression? [/quote]

This is very true but I can't seem to do it.
The home environment is toxic; I cannot seem to attract people who are positive due to lack of energy and social skills and they probably sense that I have nothing to offer them.


[quote=suzanne98]The most important thing I would like to respond to is....you have to surround yourself with people who make you feel good. You need positive peole around you who will help you're healing. Try to do that as much as possible. [/quote]

One of the problems is that I have no insurance so my choice of doctors is limited; I take what I can get and recently they've been tightening the financial assistance. My primary doc is a surgeon who is not very interested in issues apart from removing the tumor; she does refer me to other specialists which is useful but I do not have a primary doctor. I do see a psychiatrist and I am working on finding another therapist.

[quote=ChristineB]Being a cancer survivor can be difficult. Sometimes we tend to think way too much about the whole ordeal we have endured and it can become overwhelming. Seems that only cancer patients or their caregivers truly understand how awful cancer really is, especially oral cancer.

Happiness is contagious. Try to avoid the negative people and seek out the ones who are more positive and it will help you to feel better. Some days its easier than others to do this. I always try to keep away from the grouchy ones at work. It only leaves me feeling rotten when I talk with them and they start complaining and I tell them to cheer up, things could be worse. It gets irritating to me when I must tell someone who is perfectly healthy (in my eyes) that their latest sniffle will be ok.

A good doctor and therapist can help to make all the difference too. Have you discussed all of theses things you mentioned with your family doctor or someone who specializes more in that type of field? Sometimes it takes a few tries before you find the right fit with a specialist that you are comfortable with.

Hope you start to feel better soon. Its a new year, lets try to make it a good one [/quote]

Do you have a significant other? I know my trip was 1000 times better because I had my wife by my side.

Hi TRT,
I'm kind of a stranger hopping in here, I've just been reading through these posts. I had horrible, horrible problems with depression following my first round of Tx. It was worst when I was in the process of getting off the pain meds (like Fentanyl, oxycontin, etc). But it persisted long after and I still struggle with it on and off. I'm on both Wellbutrin and Prozac now. Sometimes I feel ashamed that I'm on these meds, like ashamed that I have this problem of depression. But my wife reminds me that it's a legitimate medical condition caused by imbalances in the body and it's nothing to be ashamed of. It's a good thing she reminds me because I really struggle, even when I go in to the doc and they ask me to update what meds I'm on.

I'm in the middle of my second recurrence now, with cancer in both lungs. They're telling me there's not a lot they can do except try to prolong things, although I seem to be responding a little bit to the chemo Tx. I'm actually finding myself less prone to being depressed since this recurrence started because I'm so focused on getting through it and figuring out what I can do (if anything) to survive and make it through this thing.

I just wanted to encourage you. As you've seen from all these posts, the depression is something most of us have run into or struggled with at some point post Tx, and there's a lot of us that still struggle with it. It all started for me in Feb 06 and it's still a struggle today. The advice about surrounding yourself with people who lift you up and who you enjoy being around is good, good advice.

I wish you the best. Don't forget you have a lot of people here who care about you and want to help support you.
-Steve

Steve I think there is something to be said and agreed upon with what you said concerning the reoccurance and being focused on the treatment. I think that is my situation as well. I was so busy just doing what had to be done that now I am trying to sort out how I feel and dealing with the fall out. This is defenately not a walk in the park. But life always still goes on and we keep putting one foot in front of the other...

I couldn't agree more. When we are faced with treatment and surviving everything else takes a back seat. I guess that's good but I sure did find that part to be easier. Once my tx was over and the reality set it the depression and anxiety were so hard. It's really nice we all have each other.

No, I am going thru a divorce which is stressing me big time. I think it would be much easier if I had support at home or a significant other. I am having a lot of trouble attracting women (or even trying) due to lack of energy, anxiety, poor social skills, not going out etc. If I do try something, the stress makes me sick.

[quote=davidcpa]Do you have a significant other? I know my trip was 1000 times better because I had my wife by my side. [/quote]