#75978 06-20-2008 04:29 PM | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP  Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 5,260 | I can sit and read posts for a couple of hours. My problem is I am too sensitive and get teary eyed with some post. Anyone else experience this?? I"m not ashamed to show my emotions but I have no fears either.
Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
| | | | | Joined: May 2008 Posts: 219 Platinum Member (200+ posts) | | Platinum Member (200+ posts)
Joined: May 2008 Posts: 219 | That just shows that you are a very kind, caring and strong person. Your family must be very proud of you. Angel
SCC left tonsil, tonsillectomy with additional tissue removed 06/10/08, a few teeth on top left side removed 09/05/08,recurrence before treatment started at BOT and tonsil area, 35 IMRT treatments began 10/15/08, and Cisplatin IV (began10/16/08) weekly for duration of radiation.
| | | | | Joined: Dec 2007 Posts: 57 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | | Supporting Member (50+ posts)
Joined: Dec 2007 Posts: 57 | I thought I was the only softie. It's life and it's sometimes painful. It is the hearts and souls of people reaching out for some sort of comfort. Not everyone around us knows what it is to go through this pain. This place lets you realize that you are not alone. It is a place where I feel better even though I cry when I read. You are caring and you are understanding of the pain.
Noemi
Brother diagnosed SCC August 2005, radiation and chemo- 2 rounds, total glossectomy Sept. 2007, passed away May 21, 2008
"Everyday is beautiful" he stated on a cold and foggy Chicago winter day.
| | | | | Joined: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,019 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Feb 2005 Posts: 2,019 | Jim, There are many times I get teary-eyed reading something here. This disease is just heartbreaking sometimes.
SCC(T2N0M0) part.glossectomy & neck dissect 2/9/05 & 2/25/05.33 IMRT(66 Gy),2 Cisplatin ended 06/03/05.Stage I breast cancer treated 2/05-11/05.Surgery to remove esophageal stricture 07/06, still having dilatations to keep esophagus open.Dysphagia. "When you're going through hell, keep going"
| | | | | Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,219 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,219 | Jim,
You can bet that you're not the only "guy" here that gets teary eyed. Sometimes I get so down, that I have to stay away for a couple of days. Every day there are new people.
5505 members and I'm 2154. That's some increase in just over 3 years.
And don't worry about your signature...we all know what you've been through and we admire and love you and pray that you stay cancer free from now on. Keep that "good humor" flowing.
Jerry
Jerry
Retired Dentist, 59 years old at diagnosis. SCC of the left lateral border of the tongue (Stage I). Partial glossectomy and 30 nodes removed, 4/6/05. Nodes all clear. No chemo no radiation 18 year survivor.
"Whatever doesn't kill me, makes me stronger"
| | | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | Hi Jim
joined the redeyed brigade then lol.
sometimes i read the board behind my newspaper so mum cant see me blubbing.I have been here for 16 months and my number is in the 3,000's .The newbies just keep on coming.
liz
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007
Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
| | | | | Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Nov 2002 Posts: 3,552 | Sometimes it's so overwhelming that I just have to take a break from it from time to time. I get my head wrapped around other things so I can keep my sanity. It's creepy that over 5,000 people have joined the forum since I did. Everytime that someone dies here or has a recurrence, impacts me deeply. I have professional counseling training and you still never get used to it. One of the hardest things was the first OCF meeting in Las Vegas. It was great putting faces to the names but the dark side was many of those are no longer with us. It made it very difficult and very personal. I met their wives and kids - it was heart wrenching. Danny boy said it well when he called it "a bastard of a disease"...
Gary Allsebrook
***********************************
Dx 11/22/02, SCC, 6 x 3 cm Polypoid tumor, rt tonsil, Stage III/IVA, T3N0M0 G1/2
Tx 1/28/03 - 3/19/03, Cisplatin ct x2, IMRT, bilateral, with boost, x35(69.96Gy)
________________________________________________________
"You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" (James 4:14 NIV)
| | | | | Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 706 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 706 | My husband has found me crying at the computer several times. He thinks I'm torturing myself but I think it's more like validating my feelings and fears. Sometimes when I try to talk to people about what I'm going thru-they say "be positive". At least on this board people aren't afraid to tell me the truth of what they are going thru also. The losses are devastating though. I had just started getting advice from Brenda when she passed. That really brought home the severity of this devil. The doctors had been telling me that everything was going to be fine. One even asked why I looked so sad after my husband's surgery went on for 12 hours. This place and the people here made me feel ok about being sad. We will all lose someone we know-this is not the bed of roses some paint it to be. That said I'm in tears again.
Sue
Last edited by suemarie; 06-21-2008 05:55 AM.
cg to husband, 48 Stage 1V head and neck SCC. First surgery 9/07. Radiation and several rounds of chemo followed. Mets to chest and lungs. "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain." Went home to God on February 22, 2009.
| | | | | Joined: Aug 2006 Posts: 199 Senior Member (100+ posts) | | Senior Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2006 Posts: 199 | Every time I read about someone's recurrence, or some of the terrible side effects they are having, it affects me deeply. I mourn deeply the people that have been lost. Sometimes I too have to stay away for a little while... but as others have said, I also feel like this is the only place where people really DO understand the fears, the tears, and sometimes if we are lucky, the wonderful feeling of relief that a negative test or passing a milestone give us....while at the same time feeling sad for others not so lucky.
Ginny M. SCC of Left lateral tongue Dx 04/06,Surgery MDACC 05/11/06: Partial glossectomy with selective neck dissection. T1N0M0 - no radiation. Phase III clinical trial ("EPOC" trial)04/07 thru 04/08 because tests showed a 65% chance of recurrence. 10 Year Survivor!
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | There have been many times that a post has swelled me up but the worst time I've had so far is dealing with someone face to face that passed away from this crap. I can't imagine what some of you have gone through watching your loved one succumb to this disease.
For some reason I also think that I'm more sensitive now than I've ever been. I can get swelled up watching movies now and that never happened before. I wonder what has been changed mentally in me or perhaps a lot of us that was caused by ourselves being so close to death?
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
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