Gary,
I think you are right about the trigger....when I sat and thought about it, I have been dealing with so much anger. My brother was dx with AIDS in 11/94. I can barely remember what our entire family was like prior to that date. I know that we enjoyed freedom from fear, that much I do recall.
I am afraid for Eddie and his family tomorrow, they meet with the MO and so much of what that appt brings, decision wise, lies so heavily on my heart. Today apparently was a very bad day for his father--all day. I can't imagine why--they still have only given him vicodin!
I don't know what to say to Eddie to make him feel better...seems so strange after all this last year has brought to my family. We had hope, from what I understand about oat cell it's fast and unforgiving.
I've given Ed all the info I could think of for him to present to the MO and his family in regards to hospice and pain mgmt. I'm not going along with them all tomorrow, the room is too small not to mention, I'm still just an outlaw (not blood). Part of me is relieved to not be going, the other half is wishing I could.

As with everything in life it just takes time to accept and adjust I guess.

Thanks.


Donna
CG to Mom, dx 4/25/07 with tongue cancer,T3N0,tx began 7/6/07, 31 tx's of IMRT, 8 cycles of Erbitux. Brachytherapy, surgery, left neck dissection and temp trach placed all on 9/17/07, trach removed 10/17/07. ORN of jaw, late effect of radiation symptoms. **lost my beautiful mother on 5/5/11.