Oral Cancer Community --

My mother was recently diagnosed with palate cancer (stage 3-4). The ENT specialist recommended
surgery (removal of hard and soft palate) and radiation.

My mother is trying to decide what action to take; ie, whether or not to pursue treatment. She is
primarily concerned with quality of life issues after treatment (prosthesis, swallowing, speech, etc.).

If anyone in this community would be willing to share their experiences with her, please contact me
at [email protected].

Thanks! Steve

I do not wish to sound callous here, but she has only one option. Have the surgery and the radiation and live. Forgo treatment, and life will be short and painful at the end. This quality of life issue is certainly important, but fear of the discomforts of the treatments and tolerating a removable appliance for the rest of her years is no reason to quit. Try to bring her soon to a positive perspective on her future. Every day untreated makes a positive outcome less likely. Obviously other issues are unmentioned that may affect her decision. If she is 95 and feels that she has lived a long and good life, palliative care to bring things to a close in a comfortable manner with family may be a viable choice. If she is a younger woman, then my personal opinion as an outsider, is that life is worth fighting for

Brian --

Thank you for your direct yet compassionate reply. My mother is looking for this type of personal information so she can make an informed decision. She is justifiably scared of the unknown, and hence the need to talk with someone that has gone through a similar experience. I will pass along your comments to her.

Again, if anyone in this community would be willing to allow her to call and discuss the treatments, please contact me either via this forum or via e-mail at [email protected] (she does not use e-mail/web).

Thanks! Steve

If your mom would like to personally talk with me on the phone, please contact me at [email protected] and we can coordinate a time. I will try to put her mind at rest regarding the process...not that it is easy, or painless, but that it is doable. That the life after treatments with family and friends is worthwhile, and is a life which has a wonderful taste that only those who have fought for it understand fully. In the last year I have "watched" two people die from choosing too late to move forward with treatment, selecting it only when the reality and fear of death, overcame the fear of the healing process. If I can help you convince her to not delay, to look to a positive and worthwhile future, I will try. This is the essence of our universal existence, the constant struggle of personal will over fear of the unknown. So many die from OC already, people who do not have a choice, that when there is the opportunity to survive, it must be grasped. I can't do this for everyone, but I do not wish to see another lost from fear instead of the disease. Please contact me if I can help.