hi JAM,

i was in a similar situation with regards to 3 hrs from the hospital. we choose to get an room across the street from the radiation unit. that turned out to be a good choice for us because shortly after treatment started i was sleeping upwards to 16 to 20 hrs each day. i needed a bed!

besides the rad, i was receiving chemo. So i also needed to be at the drip center during 3 one-week periods. Those treatments were about 2 hrs each.

then there were lots of unexpected things, so i needed to see the doctors on lots of different days.

being away from home was not pleasent, so we made the stays near the hospital as short as possible... that is we left home on Monday mornings and returned home on friday afternoon. it was always a pleasure to return home... but we realized that during the week, we were better off closer to the hosiptal.

as always, each case needs to be assessed on its own merits. an room near the hospital worked for us.

you can check with the cancer support group at the hospital and they will recommend various housing options.

best wishes to you and John.
cu,
larryb

I usually drove myself to MDACC, but it was only 25 to 30 minutes. I would suggest asking the hospital or its social workers to recommend housing. Many hospitals can refer you to inexpensive suite hotels with shuttle service or even apartments subsidized by charities. I would have been absolutely miserable if I had to have driven so far each day during radiation. I think that it is a bad idea. Sooner or later, radiation makes a person feel bad...that's just the facts...not a question of how strong or weak you are.

Best of luck,
Danny G.

For the first 1/3 of the treatment, I drove myself to the hospital which only took 10 minutes. When my body became weaker, I took a taxi by myself. Then a few days later, I was so weak that I had to get my relatives to accompany me to the hospital. About one month after treatment began, I started to have fever and lost a lot of weight that the oncologist felt I could not stay at home traveling to and from hospital anymore. So I was hospitalised for treatment. That was the last 3 weeks of the treatment and my husband felt relieved that his wife was well taken care of because he knew I am that kind of person who is hesitant to ask for people's help. That could be very risky because something might happen when travelling even though the distance was so short. So my advice to patients in treatment is try to get others' help as much as possible whenever necessary. Sometimes we give and sometimes we take. That makes the world go on and on.

Karen

Hi,

Thought I would add my 2 cents.

I drove in Jan/Feb from Antioch IL (IL/WI) border to the University Of Chicago (far south side of Chicago almost IN) and back by myself every day.

Anyone who has ever spent any time here could tell ya that that is a monumental undertaking especially in winter (2-3 hours) with the rush hour traffic.

My doctors told me the same thing. "It will never work". "You will be too sick", " you will miss treatment(s)", etc.

I did it. No problem. Here's why.

I could not stand staying in the hospital; I wanted to be home period. If I was going to die or be sick it wasn

If I understand you correctly, we are talking a 3 hour 1 way drive or 6 hours a day for 6 weeks. This is a very bad idea even if he is not sick. Do try to find a place to stay. Definitely have plan ready in case the trip becomes too much for you or him. Is there someplace romantic that is not too expensive closer to the center. Maybe you could treat the first part of this as a vacation. Doing six hours every day is insanity. Neither of you will last. Perservance and bullheadedness is good to help you through this, but don't drain your what energy the two of you have to get through this by trying to drive this daily. What is the point? Try it for a few days and I think you will agree. I take a 4 hour drive to Saratago every year for vacation and still wish I had a magic carpet to get me there. I cannot imagine trying to do this daily for 6 weeks. Hope it works out for you but I would have a backup plan.

Take care,
Eileen

Hi Amy,
As you can see from the above posts, everyone has a different story. I would suggest that you support your husband's attempt to drive both ways each day. It doesn't sound like you'd be able to convince him otherwise at this point.

After a couple weeks of treatment, it should become very clear whether this is going to work or not. I would suggest checking with the hospital to see if they have an arrangement for out of town patients or recommend any hotels/motels that offer discounted rates for patients.

If there are such places, contact them now to see how much notice they would require to accommodate you and your husband and make a back up plan. My sense is that ultimately, it will depend on how severe the side effects are and as you can see, everyone reacts differently to the radiation treatments. I'm also curious why the treatments are four days a week. From what I've read on the OCF site, it seems like five days/week for 6-7 weeks is the norm. Best of luck for a successful treatment. - Sheldon

OK. I guess I can throw my penny in the ring as well.

We drove 40 minutes one way to Methodist hospital here in Houston. Traffic here is pretty messy most times but I was able to schedule him at lunch which the rad folks accomodated even though I am sure they would have rather not... (They were awesome people!) and that helped with the avoidence of the worst of the traffic. HOWEVER, and I say this because it happened so many times I can't count...

The Rad machines are not perfect pieces of equipment. Many times the computers went down and the machines were offline and not functional. Many, many times we were there for hours waiting to get him in. Our time slot was 12:45pm and very often we did not leave the hospital until 5,6, even 7pm a few times.

Having a 40 minute drive was not too bad but a 3 hour drive, for us, no way. I would have just put my foot down and drawn a line whether he liked it or not. He knows that because there were many other times I have had to do just that over the last several months. He hates it but he does it.

Anyway, I guess what I am saying is that since Harry had both chemo and rad and he was very sick because he did not handle either very well, that 40 minute drive for him was like 12 hours. He sometimes fell asleep, other times he was excessively anxious to the point of despair. When we would get home he would lie down and then keep telling me that he thought he was dying.

I have a Dodge grand caravan with the seats that fold into the floor. For all of his rad txs I put 2 mattress covers, blankets, a pillow and a bucket in the back of my car and most of the time he laid there while I drove him to and from.

My advice is that you take steps for a backup plan and have that in place so that should a day come when you just can't make it back home you will have a place to stay.

I was extremely tired from the driving and staying up all night taking care of him that there were a couple of times I thought I was going to have to pull off the road so I wouldn't fall asleep. Most of the time I had to swallow some vivarin or no-doze to stay awake. 6 weeks might not seem long on the face of things but when you are in the thick of it and once you become exhausted, then it will feel like forever.

I wish you the best with everything.

Cindy

Believe it or not, along with the good advice you have offered, I have laughed out loud while reading some of these posts Robert, you sound just like John! Do you have a wife, if so, can I talk to her ? Eileen,it is a total of 6 hrs. driving a day-Sheldon, the treatments are 5x a week, beginning the week after Memorial Day. John will do his 3rd treatment this Fri. 27th and 4 next week, then start 5 days a week. He drove himself this week[said he wanted me to be at Homeworks to oversee things} we'll see what happens next. Funny, one excuse he is using for driving himself is that he doesn't want me to get worn out. Course, he's waking me up before daylight getting ready to leave, I worry while he's on the road, so I might as well be in the car with him. Another excuse for not staying in Little Rock is not wanting to board our 3 dogs-read his "kids"- but, I outfoxed him there. I found a Residence Inn that allows pets- altho I don't know if they will take 3-[I need to go set the alarm for 5 a.m. tomorrow to be sure he's up] Since he isn't taking any chemo, my prayer is that this won't hit him as hard as it has some of you.Youall are such warm and compassionate people-and sometime REALLY FUNNY! Thank you, Amy

Amy,

The folks on this site really are the best. I can't comment on the radiation treatment John is currently undergoing, but I just wanted to wish you the best of luck. All of us are pulling for you and John, and hoping you get through this with no problems!

It sounds like you have done your research and are prepared in case the drive gets to be too much. Good for you! I am also married to a stubborn mule of a man (wouldn't trade him for the world), so I know what you are up against. But, his resolve will be one of the things that helps him get through this.

Best wishes to you Amy! Keep in touch.

Jennifer