....while we SWELTERED in the 70's today....lol...temps set a new record...


Thinking of you.....keep us posted!


Lois & Buzz in NC

Lois, if you keep with this warm sunshine talk, you are liable yo have a visitor. LOL. It's miserabe in the Ohio Valley. We had 2 days of snow, 7 inches the 1st day and 2 the next. Today is cool damp and foggy. Man am I jealous . Thinking of you and Buzz and wishing Barb was here to snuggle with me. Still hoping tho. Have a great day... Old Cold Jim

hi all ,, i hope you all are doing well concidering...i know you all are hoping for that fairy tale ending to a long story.. and yes jim has tried everything.. and like some of you said DONT SMOTHER HER.. well you know how that goes.. when your a person not used to the things he is offering me now then YES it is smothering...there has been alot said and done the last couple of months in this relationship that im sure hasnt been brought to any ones attn. but i guess some things are better left unsaid... as for jims cancer i really dont blame this brake up on that.. as you all know i was there for him and with him thru it.. and i also was told bye his kids there was no other one they would rather have for a step mother then me..but it seems when jim was going thru the worst they would call and and talk and all that but do you know how many times i seen or heard from them from the time he came home and the time i moved out? i need not say...i moved out from jims once before this and was gone 6 mo. but went back because he said things would change and get better.. well that lasted a year.. well maybe not that long but i had told him if things were ever to go bad again then i would leave and never look back... but what i dont get is why he has to blame it all on the cancer..im sure when you dont feel good you can be grouchy but not to an extent as this has turned to..when he had the surgery and all that i was very much in love with him and was hoping things would turn out for the good with his health and all of that and for us too but thats not the case. he expressed at different time that he didnt want to get married and not only to me did he say that.. it hurt ... and i dont feel i need to be where im not wanted.. but only for that house guest... so its better that i move on and wish him the best with his health ,, and i wish you all the best with yours also..oh and no im not saying im perfect in any way lord knows im not and im sure i have done wrong but i do think this is for the best

Barb--how brave of you to write!
You are a person in your own right and although we all hope for happy endings, sometimes the happy endings come different ways--splitting being one of them.
I don't think there's a person here, including Jim, who hasn't been amazed at your support of him through surgery etc.
And oh boy, do I, and others I won't mention by name , understand your upset about the apparent lack of concern by others who were 'there' in emergency times, but never seemed to stay the course.
Thank you Barb for thinking of the health of the rest of us, and as for you and Jim, as separate individuals who were once together, and know a lot about each other, only you 2 know what the future can/might hold, together or apart.

Cancer is CRAP, it does change us, but as I've said before to lady partners on this board, it's never an excuse for abuse of any description, in any form. Anything other than that can either be worked through, or lead to the realisation that the relationship wasn't right BEFORE cancer.
Bless you Barb,

Brenda

I am glad I came to this site tonight. I respect Barb and her feelings. I did get too read how it is for sure, because things were not too bad this morning when we talked. I had some hope then. As for my kids, Barb is right,they did come to the hospital for the surgery and to see me after. When I came home, they were just like Casper the friendly ghost.LOL. I have taken Barb to many Drs in cities not very near us for surgeries and office visits and would take her again where ever it was. I took her kids to an orthodontist that was 90 miles from home many times too.Some of these trips were before we even divorced our spouses. Have to tell you this. we were at Sam's club 0ne day and who do we see but my wife. LOL We went out the door and Barb asked me what I was going to do. I said we are going back in and then we went up to my wife and I introduced them. Heck, we even stayed at a motel 2 times when we were away from home
for one surgery she had, she told her husband I was sleeping on the floor the 1st time and the 2nd told him I was sleeping on the couch. Oh my we had a LOT of good times. He was dumb enough to believe her. LOL No wonder I love her so much.We had way more good than bad times in our 5 yrs. She has her faults like all of us. She is like a Pitbull when she gets angry and can talk on the phone for hours. Now that upset me. I guess if this is what she wants, I can't stop it, but will keep trying. It will be the hardest thing I ever was forced to do. I have never figured out what I did that was so wrong to make this happen, but I am man enough not to say it isn't all true. I gave her and her daughter anything they ask for or wanted and probaly still would. I like to make people happy and messed this relationship up from what she says. She sure wasn't an angel either, but to me it makes no differnce.. Any thanks fo letting me vent and I will love Barb forever for being there for me. Too bad she doesn't feel that way for my being there for her. OK,, I know all, i have said enough. LOL I hope she sits with me at the Church Christams dinner after I bought our tickets. GRRRRRRRR that would be upsetting, even for me if she didn't. nite all

Barb has never been just a houseguest in this house. We bought it for us as soon as we saw it.This is and was our home. Without Barb here, I'll have to sell it to get rid of having to be here without her. My main reason for not wanting to get married was the age difference, but this OC has not only changed my mind about marrying her but my whole outlook on life. My youngest son didn't want me to get married , but I told him that if Barb would say yes, we would get married in a minute. Really Dad? I said definetly for sure Ryan. He said I'm glad.I had to unload again all . I feel terrible after reading Barb's later all

Lois, I just have to give you some good news. It was 64 here today and at midnight it's still in the 60S.. see we get some nice weather at times. LOL

Lois and Buzz, I'm gald for yesterday , because when I got up at 7 this morning it was back to normal..38 and looking bad today.

This is for all the people that come here and read. I have no one to talk with and seeing as we are all in this together, I thought I could vent. I hope I didn't upset anyone by babbling on and on. I hope you all forgive me for being unthinking. This is for OC not Ann Landers fans. Sorry all. Jim

Babble on, Jim...whatever it takes to make you feel a little better...Temps near 80 today, but it's going to be cold and rainy by the weekend! I can't believe what those folks in Missouri are being subjected to! Makes me GLAD to live in the SOUTH!

Lois