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#35655 12-09-2007 03:05 AM
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EzJim Offline OP
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Anne, i got the PetScan Friday and they made me 2 CD to send to Columbus I will mail them Monday and wait for the results. LOL i am no faint heart and have tried everything to no avail,, I'll lewt you know how the scan comes out and have a great day.


Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
#35656 12-09-2007 05:09 AM
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Jim,

I woke up several times one night with no air. Doc ordered a sleep study and what was happening was my tongue was falling to back of my throat and cutting air off. I just got a CPAP machine that has a mask the goes over my nose and it forces air down my windpipe keeping my tongue from cutting the air off. Its the same machine that is prescribed for sleep apnea.

Billy


Dx Mar 07 with Base Of Tongue Stage IV. IMRT 35x with 3 doses Cysplatin ran concurrent. Tx ended May 31,07. Left and right node involved. Radical neck disection 7/18/07
#35657 12-09-2007 06:40 AM
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EzJim Offline OP
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Billy...thank you for the info. That was the furtherest thing from my mind as to what causes it.. Have great a Holiday with your family...Jim


Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
#35658 12-09-2007 07:18 AM
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FYI, Jim, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea about 4 years ago, so I use CPAP every night. I have to be careful to use the humidifier with it, though, or my mouth and throat get really dry, especially now that it is winter (well, not officially, I know, but I shoveled 5 inches of snow off the driveway this week, so it's winter!).

You might talk to your doctor about a referral to a sleep center for evaluation. Lots of fun, they put about 20 wires around your head and chest, a few straps, and tell you to sleep well!

Jeff


Jeff
SCC Right BOT Dx 3/28/2007
T2N2a M0G1,Stage IVa
Bilateral Neck Dissection 4/11/2007
39 x IMRT, 8 x Cisplatin Ended 7/11/07
Complete response to treatment so far!!
#35659 12-09-2007 08:10 AM
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Jim,
I agree with the ladies--
stay away from the shovel
let barb know how you feel--but don't suffocate her. you know her, know her space limits....you can find a way...


Donna
CG to Mom, dx 4/25/07 with tongue cancer,T3N0,tx began 7/6/07, 31 tx's of IMRT, 8 cycles of Erbitux. Brachytherapy, surgery, left neck dissection and temp trach placed all on 9/17/07, trach removed 10/17/07. ORN of jaw, late effect of radiation symptoms. **lost my beautiful mother on 5/5/11.
#35660 12-09-2007 07:02 PM
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Jim,

As long as you have put this topic out there, it seems like you miss Barb a ton. Here's a questions for you, do you miss Barb or do you miss the companionship of having that someone special in your life.

In the beginning, when you were both posting it seemed like you had an amazing love, concern and compassion for one another. And I think in one post you expressed reluctance to marry even though that is something she expressed a desire in.

Do you think this is all fall out from oral cancer. Or, do you love her and are your ready to propose? We're just a bunch of chicks here wanting to read about a movie type happy ending.

However, loneliness shouldn't be the driving factor in getting her back. Undying love...that would be a more appropriate reason.

I agree with Donna, don't suffocate Barb. Maybe the time apart will be good. Have you thought of starting over with dating and letting her get to know the new you.

I don't think you can go through this type of experience and not realize changes in your life...and, the changes, they are not all bad.

Stop shoveling your snow. Hire a service or ask a neighbor or relative.

Wishing you the best,


Margaret
----------
C/G: Husband, 48 (at time of dx)
Dx 5/18/07 SCC, BOT, lymph node involvement. T1N2BM0. (Stage 4a, G2/3)
Tx 6/18 - 8/3/07, IMRT x 33 Cisplatin x3 (stopped after 1st dose due to hearing issues). Weekly Erbitux started 6/27/07 completed 8/6/07.
#35661 12-10-2007 12:47 AM
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First - you say you've tried everything to no avail and so I am assuming this means proposing as well. If that is the case, then how about this non-original thought: "If you cannot be near the one you love, then love the one you are near". So, are they any others nearby?

Second - you can't make someone feel the way they don't want to or are unable to feel. That is too much responsbility to place on another person. You are responsible for your own happiness. If your happiness includes occasional time with your lady, then enjoy that for all it's worth without worrying about what more there could be. Love is like ice cream. . . . enjoy it now! Don't worry about whether you'll ever have another dish.


Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)



#35662 12-10-2007 02:39 AM
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EzJim Offline OP
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This is for all my friends,, I have proposed ,I have almost kissed her rear, given her space, shed tears with her, and things I said I would never do to keep someone. I believed that just walk away and find another. Here is a couple of examples of how things are going..Yesterday morning in church she came and sat with me. We talked about the church Christmas dinner , which is this Saturday. I asked her if I should pay for her and Her Daughter Samatha. I wrote the check and turned it in. Then I was told she might or might not sit with me at the dinner. Hmmmm, not a good thing to say. I asked her how, when someone pays for you to go somewhere, can you not possibly sit with them. This was at the evening service. I have tried everything that i can possibly think of to convince her that after 5 yrs, there has to be some feelings for each other. I even wrote an oathe as to how I would treat her . She has said things about me that noone should say about another person and keeps adding to them to try to convince others as to how bad a guy I am. I proved her wrong on most of it but there is noway she will appologize , say I'm sorry, or I was wrong. If she were a man her teeth would have relocated to back of her head. I even overlook that and forgave her. It seems she will say anything to make her feel she is justifying her leaving. As for the dating, I have invited her to go out for dinner or where ever she wanted. Why does she try to make me look bad to her friends and family? Self justification? My daughter, a critical care nurse and my 300 lb son that competes in the world's strongest man competition from time to time, wanted to come out here and strighten things out. I told them to forget it and not to even think about it. I don't want to cause Barb any embarassement in the town she was raised. That's it in a nutshell. As for other ladies, I have had no problem attracting them , but I am just not interested in anyone else. Thank you all for the advice and I wish I knew why I can still have feelings for her. Jim


Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
#35663 12-10-2007 02:44 AM
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EzJim Offline OP
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Just a post script,, When we 1st got together, I promised that I would always be her for her . I have never broken a promise . A promise to her daughter is what created this mess anyway. I had to break that promise to try and clear things up between us.


Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
#35664 12-10-2007 02:00 PM
Joined: Jun 2007
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EzJim Offline OP
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Jeff, I had to move 7 inches of that white stuff. I don't envy you for doing the same .Be careful with your health and take it easy. I'm hyper and have to be busy doing something. That something made me hurt big time. I had another PetScan Friday
and mailed the CDs they made me this morning..Dr Viada is worried about my lungs which encourages me a lot.. LOL


Since posting this. UPMC, Pittsburgh, Oct 2011 until Jan. I averaged about 2 to 3 surgeries a week there. w Can't have jaw made as bone is deteroriating steaily that is left in jaw. Mersa is to blame. Feeding tube . Had trach for 4mos. Got it out April.
--- Passed away 5/14/14, will be greatly missed by everyone here
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