#34245 08-25-2005 07:24 AM | Joined: Sep 2004 Posts: 153 Gold Member (100+ posts) | OP  Gold Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2004 Posts: 153 | Tomorrow marks one month since my brother's death. Sometimes it seems like years ago and sometimes it seems like a few days. Just as I thought I was doing better, the overwhelming sadness took hold once again. Sometimes I think it will never stop. I know, I know....He's no longer in pain; Everything happens for a reason; Time heals all wounds; but somedays all the rationalization in the world doesn't ease the pain. Well, I won't ramble on, we each have our own cross to bear. I will just continue dragging mine along. I just wanted to remember David's "anniversary" and let him know I still love him.
Sister of 32 year-old oral cancer victim. Our battle is over but the war rages on. My brother passed July 26, 2005. He was a smokeless tobacco user.
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#34246 08-25-2005 09:02 AM | Joined: Sep 2003 Posts: 1,244 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2003 Posts: 1,244 | Tonya
Time doesn't heal it just takes the rough edges off, but we learn to live and control our grief and later to enjoy the fact that we had those special people to share our lives
Sunshine...love and hugs
Helen
SCC Base of tongue, (TISN0M0) laser surgery, 10/01 and 05/03 no clear margins. Radial free flap graft to tonsil pillar, partial glossectomy, left neck dissection 08/04
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#34247 08-25-2005 01:25 PM | Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 528 "OCF Down Under" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | "OCF Down Under" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Dec 2003 Posts: 528 | Dear Tonya
David will always be with you in your heart. He is comforted and safe there.
Love from Helen
RHTonsil SCC Stage IV tx completed May 03
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#34248 08-25-2005 02:57 PM | Joined: Jun 2004 Posts: 72 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | | Supporting Member (50+ posts)
Joined: Jun 2004 Posts: 72 | Tonya: I always followed your posts since I too, am a sister of a brother with oral cancer. Helen said it perfectly: He will always be within in your heart. He is comforted and safe there.
Also, I want to say, you were a good advocate for him, helping him and his family get the very best treatment and information they could. Warm wishes & a hug, Candace
Sister of guy w/base of tongue cancer, Stage IV, Dx 4/03, finished Tx 9/03
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#34249 08-25-2005 03:59 PM | Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 1,627 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2003 Posts: 1,627 | Tonya,
Trust me, David knows you still do and always will love him. You spent all his life showing proving it.
Minnie
SCC Left Mandible. Jaw replaced with bone from leg. Neck disection, 37 radiation treatments. Recurrence 8-28-07, stage 2, tongue. One third of tongue removed 10-4-07. 5-23-08 chemo started for tumor behind swallowing passage, Our good friend and much loved OCF member Minnie has been lost to the disease (RIP 10-29-08). We will all miss her greatly.
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#34250 08-26-2005 07:40 AM | Joined: Sep 2004 Posts: 153 Gold Member (100+ posts) | | OP Gold Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2004 Posts: 153 | Thank you all. Today is a better day. Last night I was reminded of something my niece told me, "Uncle Boo is with Jesus and he doesn't hurt anymore." It reminded me just how grateful I am he is no longer feeling the intense pain he suffered the last 15 months. I would never wish him one more minute of suffering. He is at peace.
Candace, please keep me updated on your brother and know I send him, you and his entire support system my love and compassion.
Sister of 32 year-old oral cancer victim. Our battle is over but the war rages on. My brother passed July 26, 2005. He was a smokeless tobacco user.
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#34251 08-26-2005 04:33 PM | Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,676 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Apr 2005 Posts: 2,676 | Tonya, I hope you will continue to support OCF with your knowledge and compassion. It would be a fitting tribute to David. Amy
CGtoJohn:SCC Flr of Mouth.Dx 3\05. Surg.4\05.T3NOMO.IMRTx30. Recur Dx 1\06.Surg 2\06. Chemo: 4 Cycles of Carbo\Taxol:on Erbitux for 7 mo. Lost our battle 2-23-07- But not the will to fight this disease
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#34252 08-27-2005 03:13 AM | Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,163 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Jul 2003 Posts: 1,163 | Dear Tonya,
Take as much time to grieve as you need. There is no time table for this process.
Take comfort in knowing how much you loved and helped him. I don't think David would want you
to grieve too long. I'm sure he loved you as much as you loved him. He is in a better place than we are now.
Love Ya, Danny Boy
Daniel Bogan DX 7/16/03 Right tonsil,SCC T4NOMO. right side neck disection, IMRT Radiation x 33.
Recurrance in June 05 in right tonsil area. Now receiving palliative chemo (Erbitux) starting 3/9/06
Our good friend and loved member of the forum has passed away RIP Dannyboy 7-16-2006
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