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Stephany don't let the 'word HOSPICE' scare you, this is one to one care over what can be years, but with people who have walked this rocky road before you, people who know how to turn days into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years, they are on YOUR SIDE. they will be BY YOUR SIDE. Don't think you have to stare at a blank wall before you get hospice help, it's special and geared to everyone in the families who need this understanding,it's not all tears, it's about quaility not quanity of life and if I'm in that postion I would not hesitate to use their experence, let someone help you carry this load. may gods peace go with you...
Sunshine... love and hugs
Helen


SCC Base of tongue, (TISN0M0) laser surgery, 10/01 and 05/03 no clear margins. Radial free flap graft to tonsil pillar, partial glossectomy, left neck dissection 08/04
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Helen,

Thank you soooo very much for your kind words. Lots of love and hugs to you. We are exploring pain management right now and hope my mom gets some pain relief....Thank you for your advice about hospice...I am sure we will look into that as well when needed. THank you Helen and God Bless you so much. One thing I have learned in this experience is how kind people are, and my friends in here have shown me how good and kind and affectionate people are. Thank you for that!
God Bless
Stephany


Stephany.Daughter of mother who passed away 3/26/05 from Recurrent Gum Squamous Cell Carcinoma. She had 3 surgeries, and 6 weeks radiation, and then passed due to infection. I miss her very much. She was 65 years young when she passed. Love you Mom!
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Hello Everyone,

I just came back from my mom's doctor visit and he told us that my mom has less than a year to live. I am so devastated and just dont know how to deal with this. She cant eat or speak. She writes notes. THis is awful. He told us that this cancer does not spread and that she will pass on from something secondary, such as pneumonia. I just dont want to give up. He told us he cant be sure her cancer is back, but it looks that way because she has not gotten better and also because of the CT scan. Does anyone have any advice as to what I can do for my mom. She is starting pain management for her pain and nutrition in a couple of days. I just wish I could do more. I feel so awful. I am not a quitter and was wondering what I can do.
Thanks so much
Stephany


Stephany.Daughter of mother who passed away 3/26/05 from Recurrent Gum Squamous Cell Carcinoma. She had 3 surgeries, and 6 weeks radiation, and then passed due to infection. I miss her very much. She was 65 years young when she passed. Love you Mom!
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Hello Stephany,

Has your Mother had any kind of chemo treatment?
I had surgery and radiation the first go around.
I hah a reocurance in June of 05 and started chemo at that point. (Taxol & Carboplatin) The chemo is working for me. Hoping they can find some form of treatment that will help. As Gary mentiomed a second opinion wouldn't hurt. Hoping for the best.

Danny Boy


Daniel Bogan DX 7/16/03 Right tonsil,SCC T4NOMO. right side neck disection, IMRT Radiation x 33.

Recurrance in June 05 in right tonsil area. Now receiving palliative chemo (Erbitux) starting 3/9/06

Our good friend and loved member of the forum has passed away RIP Dannyboy 7-16-2006
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How can the doctor say this cancer does not spread? Please get a second opinion.


Was Primary caregiver to my mom who had stage IV, SCC, Supraglottic with Mets to 4 nodes. Diagnosed Feb 04, died unexpectedly from complications from treatment December 17, 2004.
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Thank you Daniel and Karen,

My mom is 65 and basically had just a surgery the first time and then surgery and radiation the second time. She never had chemo. Regarding the spreading, Imeant it does not mestastasize. It does not spread to organs. That is what the doc told us. That the cancer will just beat her down and she will die of something secondary. This is so hard to even type. I dont know if my mom would be up to a second opinion. She loves her doc and supposedly, he is suppose to be a good doctor here in LA. It is a good idea though. I will suggest it to my dad and my mom. Thanks so much
Stephany


Stephany.Daughter of mother who passed away 3/26/05 from Recurrent Gum Squamous Cell Carcinoma. She had 3 surgeries, and 6 weeks radiation, and then passed due to infection. I miss her very much. She was 65 years young when she passed. Love you Mom!
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Stephany,
Either this doctor did not graduate or someone did not hear correctly.

mad This cancer does in fact spread, it does in fact spread to organs, and I really think you need to get your mother to another cancer center NOW. Do not wait, call today!

PS, in a different post you asked me if I thought her draining wound was thrush, the answer is no. It sounds to me to be a fistula. Fistulas happen when bad stuff wants to get out of the body. Cancer can cause a fistula as can infections or other fluids that need a way out.

I don't like that her doctor isn't explaining things well. It may be that he is right; that her cancer is not curable, but she should be able to have chemo to slow it down. GET THAT SECOND OPINION.

I am sorry that this is happening to you and your family.


Mark, 21 Year survivor, SCC right tonsil, 3 nodes positive, one with extra-capsular spread. I never asked what stage (would have scared me anyway) Right side tonsillectomy, radical neck dissection right side, maximum radiation to both sides, no chemo, no PEG, age 40 when diagnosed.
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After just going through this with my mom, and losing the fight. I just do not understand how doctors can say there is no more they can do, when in fact they do not even know if the cancer has returned. Something can be done and something should be done! Please stephany i know how hard this is. I was my mother main caregiver and she fought like hell to beat this, she too had a doctor who she had for over 10 years. Were we at a major cancer center i believe i would still have my mom. Try to have her get a second oponion, You do not want to have to live with the what ifs. Sorry i'm ramblim.


Was Primary caregiver to my mom who had stage IV, SCC, Supraglottic with Mets to 4 nodes. Diagnosed Feb 04, died unexpectedly from complications from treatment December 17, 2004.
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 134
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Karen and Mark,

Thank you so much for your messages. After reading them, I called my dad and sister and everyone is in agreement that we should get a second opinion. Thanks so much. Regarding the not spreading issue, the doctor is highly respected in LA and he did say that. He stated it stays localized and does not spread to organs. That is what he said. Karen, what happened with your mom? I agree that we should do everything we can and I appreciate your advice. It means so much to me. Thanks again
Love
Stephany


Stephany.Daughter of mother who passed away 3/26/05 from Recurrent Gum Squamous Cell Carcinoma. She had 3 surgeries, and 6 weeks radiation, and then passed due to infection. I miss her very much. She was 65 years young when she passed. Love you Mom!
Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 134
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Ken,

I cant believe all you went through. Thank you for the advice. The doctor told us yesterday that to do HBO treatments would be like throwing gasoline on a fire. He suspects her cancer is back but cant confirm without a biopsy, and she cant do that. Ken, I wish she could do the treatments but he strongly suspects her cancer is back. We are not giving up and getting a second opinion. Glad to hear you are doing better.
God Bless you
Stephany


Stephany.Daughter of mother who passed away 3/26/05 from Recurrent Gum Squamous Cell Carcinoma. She had 3 surgeries, and 6 weeks radiation, and then passed due to infection. I miss her very much. She was 65 years young when she passed. Love you Mom!
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