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#33489 06-30-2004 09:45 PM
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 164
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Gold Member (100+ posts)

Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 164
Sweety,

I know exactly what you mean about sharing with your loved ones and care givers. I would usually be very upbeat and then all of the sudden this overwhelming sense of panic took over. I chose at that point to tell my husband that I was having a really rough time and thought I needed something to help me over the hump and went on Xanax for panic episodes and Ambien for night time relief when I couldn't get my mind to stop racing. He was totally supportive and actually felt like he was truly part of my care. He admitted to me even though he lives with me and sees me struggle everyday there is no way he could even begin to understand what or how I am dealing with everything.

I know you must be physically exhausted from dealing with this disease twice to say nothing of the emotional stress that compounds and complicates things. I agree with Ed, sometimes getting on top of your pain will go a long way in helping your physical and emotional well being. Being in constant pain really wears you down.

Here's a thought. When you're having a really horrible day, write down most of what's bothering you in a bullet point style and when someone you feel close enough to see something other than the brave face asks how you are, hand them the paper. That way they will realize how many issues you are dealing with and you won't feel as if you're whining and complaining (although you have every right to)

I hope that your symptoms subside very soon. Tell us where you are in treatment and what type of treatment you are receiving.

God Bless
Lynn


Stage 3, N0, M0 oral tongue cancer survivor, 85-90% of tongue removed, neck disection, left tonsil removed, chemo/radiation treatments, surgery 11/03, raditation ended 1/04, lung mets discovered 4/04,
#33490 07-14-2004 05:15 PM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 16
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Posts: 16
i have those same feelings but you have to stay positive and fight put your faith in god radiation therapy is a bitch when i had it last year there were days i swear i was going to die i felt dead inside it was horrible but i have to tell you it will get better once its over but i will tell you it is hard a person once told me if god brings you to it he will bring you threw it take care hang in there we are all pulling for you


30yr WM ,2003 dx oral squamous cell ca of tongue had lesion removed on lt side of tongue and 9 nodes 1 node pos. had 36 treat. rad therapy 2004 had lesion growing on lt base of tongue had partial glossectomy with skin flap taken from left arm
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