Loretta, I am so sorry you are facing what we all fear - a second fight with this awful disease.
That said, a neck dissection is much easier and faster to recover from than the radiation and chemo. I was in the hospital a bit longer because I also had surgery done in my mouth, but even at that, the day after I got home I was out pulling ivy that was overgrown. The swelling took a while to recede, and circular massage helped redirect the accumulated lymph. There was little or no pain associated with the neck part of what I had.
There has been much written in this forum about neck dissections, so if you go to the top of the page and use the search function, you will have a lot to read.
There is also a wealth of information in the main section. Check here:
http://www.oralcancerfoundation.org/facts/neck_dissections.htm Ask any questions you have, and there will undoubtedly be someone here to answer from experience.
I wish you and your husband the very best outcome possible.
