Hello everyone my name is stacia. I'm here looking for some emotional support as I battle this thing out with my dad. I just got his insurance in place so we can go and do the biopsy. However we did go to the ER and 3 Dr's looked at it and were about 90% sure it was cancer. It's so bad already he has holes in his tongue. It covers the whole left bottom part of his tonge. He can't he eat it hurts him to much. I have gotten him some meal replacement shakes it's still burns him to eat it. This is so stressful and scary for me. He's only going to be 49 I'm not ready to have to go through this with him but I'm there for him not matter what. I been reading the information on this website and I must say it's not keeping me hopeful. I mean it's pretty extreme. If anyone has any adice and want I can do for him to keep him fed and comfortable I'd really appreciate it.

Welcome to OCF! Im very sorry you have a need for our group. We will help you with your father.

I know you see many scary things by reading of what some of us have been thru. Oral cancer is a terrible disease that can negatively impact someones life with the treatments, side and after effects. Most people take for granted the ability to eat a meal, for oral cancer survivors eating a meal might not be something they can do anymore.

First take a deep breath, try to focus on things one at a time without thinking too far ahead. Doctors can only suspect its cancer but it could be several other things. Only thru a biopsy will the doctor know for certain what is wrong with your father. This will take some time. Try your very best to stay busy so you are able to avoid worrying so much. When you find yourself unable to focus on anything but your father's health try to limit the amount of time you spend on that subject. Say give yourself 5 minutes then "change the channel", get up and go find something to do that is positive and will hold your attention. It could be at least a week (usually its longer) until he gets to see the doctor. Then they may not immediately do the biopsy but only a consult and schedule the biopsy for another date. After the biopsy is done it will take about a week before the final results come back. This is why I say try to stay busy, waiting is the worst and unfortunately its a big part of the diagnosis process.

Ask his doctor for a prescription for magic mouthwash. This is a mouth rinse he swishes around in his mouth for about 30 seconds then spits out. It will numb his mouth and give him some temporary relief so he can eat or drink. Keep giving him boost or ensure (store brand of nutritional drinks) or other soft foods, maybe yogurt or smoothies, soft ice cream. Dairy usually is easiest to tolerate as it neutralizes anything that would burn his sensitive mouth. He can also rinse his mouth several times a day with a mixture of one cup warm water, one tsp baking soda and 1 tsp salt (stir it up to mix the ingredients). Im pretty certain the salt will burn his mouth and be painful for your father. Cut back the salt to only a 1/4 tsp.

Ask his doctors for liquid pain medication if you think he wouldnt be able to swallow pain pills. Im sure he must be in pretty bad pain. Mouth pain is horrible!!! No patient should have to suffer like what Im sure your father is going thru right now. He probably will need some strong pain mads to help make the sore mouth tolerable. Pain meds also come with another side effect, constipation. Make sure he tells you if this happens so you can get something to take care of it.

Heres more info that can help you to understand more about oral cancer. Stick with us and we will help you both. Wishing you and your father all the very best.

OCF Main site --- Diagnosis

OCF Main --- Resources

Hi Stacia. My cancer grew in my tongue and by the time I noticed something happening on my tongue, it started to split open along the side. So I went to a clinic, had it looked at and the doctor sent me to an ENT a couple of days later, for a second opinion and biopsy. I knew just by the look on the faces of the doctors what it most likely was, so I was prepared for the bad news when the results came back.

I know the fear of the worst case scenario and just sheer terror all too well, but try not to worry too much. Easier said than done, but there's really not much you can do about it until the results come back and confirm what you're going to be dealing with. Who knows - it may end up not being cancer at all. But if it is, then you'll be able to gather a group of doctors who will fight with everything they've got to fix your father up as best as possible.