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Delly #188824 03-21-2015 10:19 AM
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Delly Offline OP
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Hi Christine sorry didn't see reply he said he has to lie at a certain angle cos he starts coughing x I think he needs to be more upright x there I nurse that comes and changed his dressing on trach hole which as not yet healed which is a worry x he said he can't breathe through mouth everything still swollen inside x


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #188829 03-21-2015 02:15 PM
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 945
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Hi, Delly
Just wanted to wish you the best with caring for your dad. Please remember to take advantage of any help that is offered or available. You are a fabulous daughter - but you are human and it won't help if you wear yourself completely out helping your dad. I ended up with a really bab RA flare after my husband's treatment - don't be like me :-)
Maria


CG to husband - SCC Tonsil T1N2M0 HPV+ Never Smoker
First symptoms 7/2010, DX 12/2010
TX 40 IRMT (1.8 gy) + 10 Cetuximab
PET Scans 6/2011 + 3/2012 clear, 5 year physical exam clear; chest CT's clear of cancer. On thyroid pills. Life is good.
Delly #188831 03-21-2015 05:04 PM
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Posts: 71
Delly Offline OP
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Thankyou Maria I just want my dad to be ok x I no he's going to get depressed and I'm ready I just want to try help him back out of it x it's hard with my dad because he never had no hobbies or social life he just went to work came home drank brews ha and went back next day he really misses work and he wants to go back he's given himself a year ! I really really pray he gets enough speech to go back to taxi driving and I really hope he can drink a brew again :(( only time will tell xx it is very hard you think every second of the day about it and how you can make the healing time easier but it's so hard I asked if he wanted to go for a drive today but he doesn't so I can't force him just hope he keeps feeding himself and trying to help himself xx there doesn't seem to be much help yet I:/ in going to contact people Monday and see what I can do xxx


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #188836 03-22-2015 06:52 AM
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 945
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
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Posts: 945
That's tough, Delly - taxi driving is a very social profession, and I bet he does miss the interaction. How is he communicating now?
Maria


CG to husband - SCC Tonsil T1N2M0 HPV+ Never Smoker
First symptoms 7/2010, DX 12/2010
TX 40 IRMT (1.8 gy) + 10 Cetuximab
PET Scans 6/2011 + 3/2012 clear, 5 year physical exam clear; chest CT's clear of cancer. On thyroid pills. Life is good.
Delly #188843 03-23-2015 12:13 AM
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 71
Delly Offline OP
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He writes everything down and hums a few noises x I don't no how well he may eventually speak I'm hoping he has enough speech to go back to work as that's what he wants to do more than anything xx it's a creul creul life feel so bad for him but there nothing I can do except go visit every day and get him anything he needs xx


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #188875 03-25-2015 09:05 AM
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,260
Likes: 3
"OCF Canuck"
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Posts: 5,260
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Hopefully he is doing better daily. IT takes time but small improvements move you towards where you want to be.

hugs


Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
Delly #188890 03-26-2015 05:14 PM
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 945
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Posts: 945
Delly, as parent I can tell you that seeing a loving child everyday means the world. I know you would like to be able to do more - but please know that seeing you does mean a lot to him. Thinking of you both on my side of the pond.
Maria


CG to husband - SCC Tonsil T1N2M0 HPV+ Never Smoker
First symptoms 7/2010, DX 12/2010
TX 40 IRMT (1.8 gy) + 10 Cetuximab
PET Scans 6/2011 + 3/2012 clear, 5 year physical exam clear; chest CT's clear of cancer. On thyroid pills. Life is good.
Delly #188893 03-26-2015 10:48 PM
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 10
KJB Offline
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Posts: 10
Hi Delly,
I can totally relate to everything you are saying because I too was a scared daughter - i worried about whether my father could talk again, eat again, and be himself again. It is totally okay to be scared! It WILL get better - for you and him. Overtime, you will learn to accept it! This site is a great site - i read everything everyone said to my dad every single day - i kept reminding him that there are so many people going through this and they are okay, they are doing great and they are still fighting! Remember to be positive and keep cheering him on ( even if you dont feel so positive )
My father had an excellent speech therapist that helped him chew mild stuff like mashed bananas, half boiled eggs, and milkshakes post op. Within a few months, he was eating porridge, steamed fish, and thick avocado juices. I would recommend u to get a speech therapist ASAP.
I'm praying for you and a speedy recovery for your dad.


Father had oral cancer stage 4A. Diagnosed 17th May.
Partial glossectomy and graphing done from hand.
Radiation 30x. Chemo - cisplatin 6 rounds.
Finished chemo and radiation in Aug.
PET - Nov - recurrence and spread to liver and lungs
Chemo started - erbitrux and 5fu.
2 rounds done.
Passed away 12/23/2014 - i believe he is in a much better place now smile
Delly #188907 03-27-2015 05:38 PM
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 71
Delly Offline OP
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Hi everyone x dad is feeling a bit better his weight dropping a bit because he wasn't feeding enough they have now changed it to a higher calorie intake hopefully he will gain some weight before his radiation x my dad has had a massive improvement In the last few days he has actually swallowed a teaspoon of water quite a few times it doesn't sound much but it is a massive achievement as we wasn't sure if he could swallow again xx his face is healing nicely just needs to start opening his mouth a bit has no speech as he keeps his mouth closed because he says it's all to big thinks his tongue is to big I'm not sure if it is or if it's due to the swelling xx it's only 3 week post op and in my eyes he's doing amazing I've got him broadband netflicks and an iPad x just want him to try not to get to fed up staying in xx radiation starts 14 April and I no we going to have a few months of bring down and not feeling like it's going to end x my dads had radiation before on the same side so they have to try and not hit the same bits else it will cause a lot of damage so he's had a mask made to try protect these areas x he's doing amazing and I'm so proud xx Maria I fully understand this feeling I have 3 lovely children all girls and very understanding she 13,10amd 4 😀 and thankyou for your kind words xx kjb im do sorry to hear your dad passed away and after everything he went through frown how sad x dads not heard off the speech therapy yet I think everything waiting till after radiation when everything's calmed down x bet your dad was so very proud to have you as a daughter xx


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #188908 03-27-2015 06:25 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 644
Likes: 1
"OCF Down Under, Kiwi"
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
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Netflix and an iPad. Both are very medicinal. They've helped me get through the slow times.

Glad your father is recovering well from surgery. I well understand how a sip of water is significant. It's something we take for granted until we lose it.

You are giving your father great support which will make the next few months much more bearable.

Best wishes!


1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.
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