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Delly #190554 08-23-2015 04:10 AM
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 71
Delly Offline OP
"OCF across the pond"
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Hi all it's with an aching heart I'm telling you that my dad passed away yesterday :((( the lump under neck was cancer and had been getting worse and the tumour had a hole in it then two more lumps have developed over a week x dad hasn't been sleeping as he has been that worried and it was all playing on his mind and he became so scared he started seeing things frown it's been awful to watch his struggle but his mind just couldn't cope and he was so sleep deprived he just couldn't cope they had to sedate him but everhtime he woke up he was panicking and seeing things and so worried and scared so they had to sedate him x the doctor said they had to keep him sedated and if his air ways give in they couldn't ressusate because of the disease in his neck so they just kept him asleep till he took his last breathe at 1.15 yesterday :((( I'm absolutky heartbroken but I no he's at rest now ;( how awful to be that scared you can make your mind do things like that x I love him so much and I will miss him with all my heart xxxx


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #190555 08-23-2015 04:48 AM
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 10,507
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Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services
Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
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Im so very sorry for your loss, Delly! May the memories of happier, healthier of times help to ease your sorrow.

RIP


Christine
SCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44
2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07
-65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr
Clear PET 1/08
4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I
surg 4/16/08 clr marg
215 HBO dives
3/09 teeth out, trismus
7/2/09 recur, Stg IV
8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy
3wks medicly inducd coma
2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit
PICC line IV antibx 8 mo
10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg
OC 3x in 3 years
very happy to be alive smile
Delly #190556 08-23-2015 08:17 AM
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 945
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
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Posts: 945
Delly,
It is such a cruel thing that he had to pass so young, when he should have had many years with his family. You did all you could to help him, but no matter how hard we try, we are only human, and cannot give back health in all cases. What it is within our power to do is to give love and care and companionship: you faced your own fear and distress to do this. Not all people are capable of doing what you did.
It is my hope and belief that your father is in a better place, now, free from pain. As you mourn for him, remember this, and remember that he would want his dear daughter to move back into the light.
Blessed be,
Maria

Last edited by Maria; 08-23-2015 08:19 AM.

CG to husband - SCC Tonsil T1N2M0 HPV+ Never Smoker
First symptoms 7/2010, DX 12/2010
TX 40 IRMT (1.8 gy) + 10 Cetuximab
PET Scans 6/2011 + 3/2012 clear, 5 year physical exam clear; chest CT's clear of cancer. On thyroid pills. Life is good.
Delly #190557 08-23-2015 08:18 AM
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 91
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Posts: 91
I have been following your posts. I am sorry to hear about your Dad. You did an amazing job of taking care of him. I will be praying for you.
Denise


Biopsy tongue 3/24/15
Diagnosis SCC tongue/floor of mouth
Partial glossectomy, resection and right neck dissection done
4/22/15
T2aN0M0
05/01/2015-no further treatment indicated at this time,
monthly check ups for two years
Delly #190558 08-23-2015 08:51 AM
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 595
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
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Posts: 595
I am sorry for your loss, remember the good times and cherish his love and know that he was blessed to have you as a caregiver! Semper-Fi Bob



Bob age 57, non smoker,non drinker, ended treatment on 11 Nov 2007 and started back to work on 29 Nov 2007. Veterans Day 2012 the Battle was lowered, folded, Taps was played and the Flag buried as I am know a 5 year survivor. Semper-FI !!!
Delly #190562 08-23-2015 11:09 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 644
Likes: 1
"OCF Down Under, Kiwi"
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Posts: 644
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So sorry to hear that, Delly. Take care of yourself and try to remember better days with you dad. Much love to you both.


1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.
Delly #190564 08-23-2015 01:35 PM
Joined: Mar 2015
Posts: 71
Delly Offline OP
"OCF across the pond"
Supporting Member (50+ posts)
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Posts: 71
Thankyou everyone xxx I no the pain will heal and I no time will help x I will miss helping me dad and I love him with all my heart xx I told him when they sedated him how much I love him and that is was time to let go now and within 10 mins he was gone :(((( x I hope he heard me and i hope it brought him that not of help to let go ;((( xxxx thankyou for helping me with all your posts xxxx


Father 60 years old
Diagnoised oc jan 15
Peg fitted 27/2/15
Full tongue glossectomy reconstruc surge ,
Lymph nodes and glands out 5/3/15
Rt 14/5/2015

Delly #190565 08-23-2015 01:42 PM
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 79
"OCF across the pond"
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Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 79
Oh Delly , I am so sorry for your loss. Your father was so brave and so are you . I have followed your posts and think you have been amazing throughout . Im sure that you will feel very lost and wonder what life is all about at times . Your dad fought a brave battle with this truly awful disease and you stood at his side every step of the way . I'm with you when you say that your heart is broken , I'm watching my dad deteriorate each day , one minute I, wishing he would go peacefully in his sleep putting an end to his suffering and then selfishly I cannot imagine my life without him in it. ....... I hear you , do whatever you need to get through. Big hugs xxx
I'm at Christies Tuesday myself 3 month check up, whenever I go I wondered if I'd bump into you . Xxx


Di 47 none smoker / drinker

T4 SCC left tonsil
1 Cistplatin,30 RAD finished treatment on 4/12/2013
Trismus
First MRI scan appears clear
TX
NG tube 9 weeks
acute vommiting, syringe driver 9weeks
2 month checks
Delly #190570 08-24-2015 02:04 AM
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1,024
"OCF Kiwi Down Under"
Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
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Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)

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Posts: 1,024
Delly, I am so sorry to read this update. Your Dad fought very bravely and you were an outstanding Caregiver and support to him.
May he rest in peace. Look after yourself.
Tammy


Caregiver/advocate to Husband Kris age 59@ diagnosis
DX Dec '10 SCC BOT T4aN2bM0 HPV+ve.Cisplatin x3 35 IMRT.
PET 6/11 clear.
R) level 2-4 neck dissection 8/1/11 to remove residual node - necrotic with NED
Feb '12 Ca back.. 3/8/12 total glossectomy/laryngectomy/bilat neck dissection/partial pharyngectomy etc. clear margins. All nodes negative for disease. PEG in.
March 2017 - 5 years disease free. Woohoo!
Delly #190571 08-24-2015 02:40 AM
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 756
Likes: 1
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
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Posts: 756
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Delly,

I am very sorry to read about your father. I'm sure he knew how much you loved him and all that you did for him. He is now pain free. Cherish the happy memories. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


Susan

SCC R-Lateral tongue, T1N0M0
Age 47 at Dx, non-smoker, casual drinker, HPV-
Surgery: June 2005
RT: Feb-Apr 2006
HBOT: 45 in 2008; 30 in 2013; 30 in 2022 -> Total 105!
Recurrence/Surgeries: Jan & Apr 2010
Biopsy 2/2011: Moderate dysplasia
Surgery 4/2011: Mild dysplasia
Dental issues: 2013-2022 (ORN)
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