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#182705 06-23-2014 06:24 AM
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Aljaz Offline OP
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Greetings everyone.


Whining about myself is not something I usually do. I know that no one here can guarantee me that there is nothing wrong with me or something like that, but i just need to talk to someone about this because it really got me worried.

For the past 12 days I've been experiencing throat pain and some ear discomfort (pressure/fullness and sometimes very mild pain), accompanied by a deeper and hoarse voice. There are also some small and painless red bumps (soft to the touch) at the back of my tongue (on the side of my tongue) and a lump in my throat. Last year, I was diagnosed with leukoplakia (mouth floor, on the left side). I've been smoking since 23 (I'm now 28). About 9 months ago, I reduced tobacco consumption to 10 cigarettes per day (compared to 15-18 cigarettes before). Like I said, the troubles started 12 days ago. It's now the main exam period at the university (lasting from early June to early July), so tobacco consumption went back up to 15-18 cigarettes per day. Until two days ago that is. That is when I became so worked up, because I noticed that my leukoplakipa patch became whiter an rougher (not painful). The area around it is slightly red (with red veins visible), but that's how it's been for the past year and a half (the area around leukoplakia that is). It got me so worried that I reduced tobacco consumption to 3 cigarettes yesterday, 2 cigarettes today and finally stopping tomorrow. The specialist will be in on Wednesday and the checkup will probably not happen until sometime next week. In the meantime, I'm a bundle of nerves smile How can I keep my mind of it until then and focus on studying? I don't fear death, but I feel annoyed and guilty for not trying to do something about it.

A bit about me (you can skip this part if you like).
28 years old. Been having a poor lifestyle ever since I started studying. I'm also allergic to a bunch of things. At 22 I was diagnosed with hiatal hernia. From that point on, everything started going downhill. I became really depressed. Anxiety kicked in. Failed a lot of exams witch increased my depression and anxiety even more. Except for my family and my mare, there is no more joy in my life. Haven't paid too much attention to my health until 5 months ago when I started exercising and mountain hiking . We have a family business that puts a lot of pressure on me. Because of all those things I have a really stressful and unhappy life. Additional stress and worrying came when they told us that we have to complete our studies and diploma (the old uni program will be replaced with a new one) until September 2016. That means if I don't pass the remaining 5 exams and write a diploma, everything will become useless and I'd have to start from the beginning.


To anyone that reads this rant of mine: Thank you for you time.


P.S.: I apologize for my terrible English.

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I don't know what to say. You claim to understand the pitfalls of smoking yet you continue and ask total strangers what is going on with your health. You need to see a DOCTOR, not chasing a medical problem through forums on the Internet.

Your level of anxiety and depression at your age is going to manifest itself in health issues. Your behavioral choices are contributing yet you won't admit that.

Cutting back to 5 cigarettes a day is not your best plan, especially if your mind accepts it is bad but you don't do anything.

Find a good ENT and work on the mouth but find some one to help you work through the other things you are struggling with. One will rob you of joy, the other may rob you of life. Neither have a good outcome.


SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 5
Aljaz Offline OP
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Thank you for replying Uptown.

I'm aware of that. I stopped asking Dr.Google more than 2 years ago for various reasons.

Anxiety and depression is a big problem with me. I admit and am aware of it.

I cut back to 3 cigarettes yesterday. Today's plan is 2 cigarettes. Tomorrow no cigarettes. I want to quit, because enough is enough.

I'll get an appointment, like I mentioned. It's probably just a cold or an infection, but I want to be sure. I've tried numerous things already (yes, therapy too), but so far unsuccessful.

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You mentioned you have already been diagnosed with leukoplakia. By continuing to use tobacco in any form you are only asking for far bigger health problems. Im sorry to be blunt but nothing good ever came from smoking or using any type of tobacco. Do yourself a favor and quit now for good. To me it sounds like smoking is what is causing your problems but seek out an ENT who specializes in treating oral cancer patients. Get yourself a thorough exam.

I also suggest finding a therapist to speak with about all your other issues. Its nothing to be ashamed of, we all have stress in our lives but not everyone can handle it by themselves. You are young and at an age where you should be on the top of the world. Talking with a professional will help you to take the weight of the world off your shoulders.

Good luck!!!


Christine
SCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44
2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07
-65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr
Clear PET 1/08
4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I
surg 4/16/08 clr marg
215 HBO dives
3/09 teeth out, trismus
7/2/09 recur, Stg IV
8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy
3wks medicly inducd coma
2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit
PICC line IV antibx 8 mo
10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg
OC 3x in 3 years
very happy to be alive smile
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Don't put off tomorrow what you can do today..stop smoking and all uses of tobacco TODAY. Your life is at stake.


David

Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
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Hi there... okay so a plan of action is needed. You already know what you have to do so I am not going to continue to beat you over the head with it. Smoking is an addiction like any other and a very hard habit to kick. It's readily available, and nicotine makes you both, behaviorally and emotionally dependent, and is also physiologically addictive.

Beyond that you need to see an ENT. You have a wealth of symptoms do they mean oral cancer? NO. Could they? yes. However, the collection of symptoms really only muddy the water. Smokers oral cancer is often found in the mouth, or throat. HPV related oral cancer is often base of tongue (down your throat) or tonsil. Cancer often has a primary, and generally the tumor grows in size insitu and spreads out, and may then spread to the nodes (usually indicated by firm painless lumps visible or palpable on the outside of the neck. But for the amount of involvement you describe - throat, ear, tongue etc, it would be highly unlikely that it was cancer, more likely severe irritation, of infection caused by smoking or something else.

I'm not saying you don't have cancer but what you describe is very defuse. It's possible you have an area that might be a tumor, but most people who have it all over the area you describe would be on their way out by now. That said DO GO SEE AN ENT - someone who is an oral cancer specialist - not all ENTs are made the same.

Hugs and good luck.




Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
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Hi Aljaz,

I'm sending you a PM on a practicable way of dealing with anxiety which I have found very useful for many years.

Look for a flashing icon next to the menu item "My Stuff," and click on "mesages."

Bart


My intro: http://oralcancersupport.org/forums/ubbt...3644#Post163644

09/09 - Dx OC Stg IV
10/09 - Chemo/3 Cisplatin, 40 rad
11/09 - PET CLEAN
07/11 - Dx Stage IV C. (Liver)
06/12 - PET CLEAN
09/12 - PET Dist Met (Liver)
04/13 - PET CLEAN
06/13 - PET Dist Met (Liver + 1 lymph node)
10/13 - PET - Xeloda ineffective
11/13 - Liver packed w/ SIRI-Spheres
02/14 - PET - Siri-Spheres effective, 4cm tumor in lymph-node
03/15 - Begin 15 Rads
03/24 - Final Rad! Woot!
7/27/14 Bart passed away. RIP!
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Hi Again, Aljaz,

I apologize for the first PM, it doesn't deal with Anxiety very well, so I've sent you a second on that does just that.

Bart


My intro: http://oralcancersupport.org/forums/ubbt...3644#Post163644

09/09 - Dx OC Stg IV
10/09 - Chemo/3 Cisplatin, 40 rad
11/09 - PET CLEAN
07/11 - Dx Stage IV C. (Liver)
06/12 - PET CLEAN
09/12 - PET Dist Met (Liver)
04/13 - PET CLEAN
06/13 - PET Dist Met (Liver + 1 lymph node)
10/13 - PET - Xeloda ineffective
11/13 - Liver packed w/ SIRI-Spheres
02/14 - PET - Siri-Spheres effective, 4cm tumor in lymph-node
03/15 - Begin 15 Rads
03/24 - Final Rad! Woot!
7/27/14 Bart passed away. RIP!
Joined: Jun 2014
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Aljaz Offline OP
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Thank you all for all those wonderful replies. When I first posted here, I said that there is redness around leukoplakia (this was the state 2 days ago). Also forgot to mention the lump in my throat and that my breath doesn't smell. I had another look this afternoon. Everything is still there (ear discomfort, throat pain,�) but the redness around the leukoplakia patch seems to have faded a bit.


To ChristineB

Thank you. I know, I know frown Guilty on all accounts. I'm also an idiot. The problem is anxiety and depression. I've been trying to quit for a year. With all the pressure and stress, it was an never ending circle. This time, however, is a bit different. With all my worries, anger, annoyance and your positive, encouraging comments, this might just be the pillar I can lean on for support. Like I said in my previous post: tomorrow is the day that will be cigarette free. I've decided to take a day off from studying and keep myself physically busy to help steer my thoughts away from smoking. As for the ENT visit: I'm planning on calling him on Wednesday (that's when he's available). The first time I went for a checkup for leukoplakia last year, I also asked for an annual checkup. So, every 4 months I go to ENT and he has a look. My next checkup is in September, so I'll just call the man and ask for an appointment now.

I've been to two therapists. It went like this: Their only solution was pills. Ok, but I wish to talk about things. No, no need to talk about it, just start taking these pills. But I really, really want to talk things through. Well, it didn't get me anywhere. I'm not against pills, but perhaps a good advice and some guidance would solve a lot of problems.

To Davidcpa

A good advice. I've already set the day: tomorrow. I've been pulling the reins had today to keep it down to 2 cigarettes and it worked.

To CheryId

Thank you. Irritation and allergies did cross my mind. Hopefully its just that. There are only two outcomes of this: 1.) I quit smoking and I get clean away with it, 2.) I quit smoking (witch is still a wonderful thing) but I pay a high price for my foolishness. I truly hope that it will be the first outcome. Only the doctor will be able to answer that.

To Bart

Thank you. I will have a look at it. Good advice, help and comforting word are always welcome.

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So did you stop?

Any updates?


David

Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 5
Aljaz Offline OP
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Yes, I stopped smile 23.6.2014 at 2:35. That's when I smoked the last one smile

A lot of people are on vacation already, including doctors. So, no updates until the specialist comes back from the vacation. Thank you for asking.

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Fantastic!!!!!!


David

Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,260
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"OCF Canuck"
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Awesome.


Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
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Great news!


SCC Stage IV, BOT, T2N2bM0
Cisplatin/5FU x 3, 40 days radiation
Diagnosis 07/21/03 tx completed 10/08/03
Post Radiation Lower Motor Neuron Syndrome 3/08.
Cervical Spinal Stenosis 01/11
Cervical Myelitis 09/12
Thoracic Paraplegia 10/12
Dysautonomia 11/12
Hospice care 09/12-01/13.
COPD 01/14
Intermittent CHF 6/15
Feeding tube NPO 03/16
VFI 12/2016
ORN 12/2017
Cardiac Event 06/2018
Bilateral VFI 01/2021
Thoracotomy Bilobectomy 01/2022
Bilateral VFI 05/2022
Total Laryngectomy 01/2023
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,671
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Super good for you!!!!


Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)



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Aljaz Offline OP
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Thanks, you are all very kind. The war's not won yet, but we're getting there smile

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