Hello everyone,

I was going to lurk awhile and see what kind of group this was but having read a number of threads already I can see being here will be good for me.

I am a 42 year old male originally from England but now a resident of upstate NY married to a wonderful American wife. We have two darling girls aged 2 years old and 10 weeks old respectively. I have never smoked and only used alcohol in moderation.

In May 2005, I went to my doctor about a lump on my neck, I was given antibiotics after it was established I had strep throat. 10 days later it had not gone away and I was refered to Otolaryngology. A CT scan and a fine needle aspiration later and the lump was thought to be a Branchial cleft cyst. Surgery was scheduled for June 10.

They opened me up and found metastatic squamous cell carcinoma. I had a total of 12 lymph nodes removed and 9 of them showed SCC.

I was in total shock and caught completely by surprise. This was not a possibility anyone had discussed with me. Unfortunately I am very aware of what Cancer is capable of. My Mother died at age 35 from a brain tumor and I was at my Father's bedside as he died from Lung cancer at age 62. (He was a heavy smoker all his life).

However, I am fortunate ? to work with two very supportive physicians at the Medical Examiner's Office. I very quickly was brought up to speed with what I might be facing and what exactly my pathology reports meant.

I went for a PET/CT scan and then I was back in the OR on July 8 My tonsils were removed and the Dr. had a good look around taking biopsies from suspicious areas. Rather luckily it turns out the wife of one of my ME's is a pathologist at the hospital and she took a personal interest in my case. Just as well because she sectioned the entire tonsils (apparently not a usual practise) found another or possibly the primary in my left tonsil. Everything else was apparently clear.

So after a week of the worst sore throat ever ( I have yet to have any radiation but I know it is coming, feeding tube and all) I am to return to work tomorrow.

And here is the reason for my post. My job is dealing with the dead, part of it is to take telephone reports of deaths in hospice programs. It is hard to remain totally upbeat when I record the negative effects of this disease every day. Especially when their date of birth is close to my own. If you survive this disease you are obviously never reported to our office. I love my job. ( it also covers medical benefits for my entire family so leaving is not currently an option). I need to hear some survivor stories to counterbalance the other stuff. I have already seen some inspiring stories in other threads so I know you are out there.

Looking forward to making a contribution to this site for a long time to come.

Paul

Paul,

Not having gone through what you have and will, I cannot give you specific answers.

I just want you to know that there will be many members writing to you soon and those of us lucky enough to had lesser treatment, are behind you too.

My prayers are with you for a speedy solution and easy treatment and I look forward to having you around for a long time to come.

Jerry

Hi Paul. Sorry to see you here my friend. I am beginning my 4th. week of radiation in the morning. Everyday I wake up I feel like a survivor. I see death as something that happens to everyone when their time is finished so cancer or no cancer I was born to die I recon so I am not as phased by it as maybe I should be. Maybe I just have rad brain. LOL

May God bless you and give you peace,
Barbara~

Hello Paul

Yes, you will find loving support here as you undergo your treatment. I am so sorry that such a young man has cancer however it is not necessarily a death sentence as I'm sure your colleagues have told you. Many here are long-term survivors of advanced cancer. I was quite shocked when my doc first mentioned the word 'cure'. Like you, I have cancer in my family and thought of it as terminal.

I found that the more info I had, the lesser my fear. This site has a wonderful library of information on various treatments etc as will as side effects. Talking about it helped me also.

Best wishes to you and your girls, love and light from Helen

Paul, early and aggressive treatment is a very good thing and tilts the odds very much in your favor. Everyone facing this has dark thoughts, but it is survivable, as you will see from the many people here. True, we have lost a few members, but many, many more are well and back to Real Life. Ask any question you have as you go along, and there will be multiple replies from those who have "been there, done that." I suspect it will be many decades before you are a statistic at your place of employment. Like many others here, I had stage 4 SCC treated with surgery, rad and chemo (and yes, a PEG) and today, more than three years later, have long been back to absolutely normal. You can have the same outcome. Let us help you on your journey.

Paul,
I am sorry for news. But as others have said, you can beat this! Go back and read the survivor stories, thats what I did when my friend Rod got sick.It really does help to see the positive. He was diagnosed with stage 4b.Left tonsil and 8 lymph nodes on the left and 1 on the right. Sounds pretty grim, huh?Well tom. July 12 is one year since treatment ended. He is doing very well! He did not have surgery just concurrent chemo & radiation. He did have the feeding tube but I think it saved his life. He is very small framed about 145 before tx, he was 114 at the end of treatment.Get the feeding tube if you don't have alot of extra cushion. His after tx issues, he is still dealing with are dry mouth(get something to protect your salivary glands!!!) and weight gain. He is up to 126 and holding. But he is working on that!You can do this!!! Like someone else here said, hit it hard! Its a long road and isn't fun but you can beat it! I wisH I could help you with your job issues but unfortunately I can't, maybe someone else on the boards can! Keep your chin up, we are all here for you!God bless! Maureen

Paul,
Welcome to the board. My husband's cancer was much like yours. He was 37 at diagnosis, found it from a lump in his neck. Had surgery thinking it was a cyst. Found it was SCC, pathologist and surgeon were friends of ours and they went on a hunch that it might be tonsil. Sure enough, very small primary tumor in middle of tonsil, not visible. Anyway, that was five years ago. He had seven weeks of radiation at MD Anderson, a rough time for awhile, but now things are great. So, hang in there. I know it is very scary and it will be hard for awhile as you go through treatment, but you'll make it through to the other side and find life so much more precious and beautiful.

Paul,

I'm so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. I know it will be an uphill battle for a while, but one well worth the fight to be here for your girls!

I am also 42 with two young girls, 7 years old and 7 months. Although my lymph nodes were negative, I can relate to the shock and depression you are feeling. I think you will find your children the best thing for you. I was and still am determined to be here to raise my girls and see them grow into happy and healthy young ladies. I want to see my grandchildren!! :-) I can't imagine dealing with death everyday and trying to remain positive, but coming home to their little smiling faces will be terrific medicine!

I haven't had to go through radiation therapy, but have seen a lot of posts on this site. Please ask these folks what to do to before, during and after treatments. They have been there and have some excellent advice.

Best wishes to you and your family!

Jennifer

Hey Paul, nice to hear from you. Sorry we had to meet this way and all of that.

I was 41 when mine was discovered. At the time my wife was pregnant with our 5th child. My kids ages are 11,8,6,5, and now 1 year.

The main thing is, get the right help and stay positive. The treatment totally sucks but it goes by fast. Takes about 6 months after to feel better.

Look deeply into this site to find out all you can. It really helps. Yes, in some cases it cant be fixed but you will be fine. Keep smiling, the next 4-6 months is gonna suck.

Bottom line, if you need anything or have any questions, drop me a line. Really. I am sure my wife can talk to yours (if she is going to caregive) regarding meals, what to expect, etc.

Good things and god bless.

Robert, Christine, Alison, Robby, Tommy, Billy, and Scott Hamilton

Hi Paul
My Husband is English ( Liverpool ) and I am from Scotland . We have lived in Georgia for 25 years and love it .
With your job I can imagine it must get a wee bit depressing but, you now need to hear of all of us who have fought the beast and won!
Right now start bulking up as much as possible , you are going to need that extra weight.
Get your wife to join us she is in for a rough go of it.
Start calling in all your markers ...you and the family are going to need lots of help . Forget the " British stiff upper lip". When friends ask what they can do , tell them to start website where someone can be in charge of co-ordinating help with meals, transportation, babysitting etc.
I don`t mean to sound mercenary but , I know what you have ahead of you.
You are a young fit guy ...you can beat this .
Take Care
Marica