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kfisher #178729 03-26-2014 05:14 PM
Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 34
kfisher Offline OP
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Joined: Mar 2014
Posts: 34
Anne-Marie, I took your advice and told my doctor that I was anxious about the surgery. His response was "Tough. You're a big girl, put on you're big girl panties and get over it." Haha. I was not expecting him to have quite that brazen of a bedside manner... Although it made me laugh and I appreciate his no BS attitude, I am hoping that the doctor I see on Friday says something a little bit different smile.

Thank you TheresaC. I appreciate that and hope you are doing well!


3/2014: 25, no risk factors (nonsmoker, rare drinker, HPV negative) SCC right lateral tongue, T1N0M0 - well-differentiated; surgery - removal of tumor, salivary gland + neck dissection
11/2017 - ovarian torsion
12/2018 - basal cell skin cancer



kfisher #178732 03-26-2014 05:44 PM
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 262
Gold Member (200+ posts)
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Posts: 262
[quote=kfisher]Anne-Marie, I took your advice and told my doctor that I was anxious about the surgery. His response was "Tough. You're a big girl, put on you're big girl panties and get over it." [/quote]

Big girl panties can also be used to gag jerks, Katherine. Just sayin'.........

Welcome to OCF. You're doing a great job taking care of yourself and doing everything you need to right now. I'm so glad you caught this early, you are going to be just fine!


53
T3N2aM0 HPV+
5/26/13 discovered painless superball-sized lymph node in neck
6/26/13 DX SCC R palatine tonsil
7/16/13 TORS tonsillectomy & selective ND, mets to 2 nodes
9/3/13 Cisplatin and rads begin, tolerated 1.5 of 3 planned chemo doses
10/16/13 Treatment ends
Dec 13 Ulcer appears at surgery site
Jan 17 Biopsy -- no cancer!
Feb 17 CT/PET Scan lights up tonsil bed & nasal cavity, docs say probably inflammation, don't panic, rescan when ulcer subsides
kfisher #178745 03-27-2014 02:36 AM
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,671
Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,671
That doctor was probably absent from class the day they discussed bedside manner. OR - he sees a strength in you that you did not realize you had. And if he made you laugh - that's good! Hope your Friday appointment goes just great.


Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)



kfisher #178747 03-27-2014 07:21 AM
Joined: Dec 2010
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"OCF Canuck"
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Actually, that's horrid. I am glad you found humor in it, but there are more tactful ways to say it. One thing about this disease - if you are timid, and anxious by nature, fighting it will be a true test of your stamina and mental endurance.

The reality is - he's not far off the mark, but there are things he can do as a physician that will make things easier. The treatment and the fear of just the word cancer are hard enough of a battle without him making it worse via a blase attitude. I think if it were me - I would definitely be seeking a different dr. I don't expect hand holding - and to me his skill as a dr. far outweighs a bedside manner - however, unless he does this all the time - (I mean specifically an ENT/Surgical oncologist at a renowned cancer institute considered to be at the top of his game) his bedside manner wouldn't be worth putting up with.

The one thing I do have to say... time is of the essence here, so a quick surgery date is best. Hugs and good luck tomorrow.




Cheryl : Irritation - 2004 BX: 6/2008 : Inflam. BX: 12/10, DX: 12/10 : SCC - LS tongue well dif. T2N1M0. 2/11 hemigloss + recon. : PND - 40 nodes - 39 clear. 3/11 - 5/11 IMRT 33 + cis x2, PEG 3/28/11 - 5/19/11 3 head, 2 chest scans - clear(fingers crossed) HPV-, No smoke, drink, or drugs, Vegan
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