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#147080 - 03/13/12 08:41 AM Smooching Amphibians
Sandy177 Offline
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)

Registered: 01/17/11
Posts: 571
Loc: California
Alas, no fairytale ending.

It's been a year since we got word of the misdiagnosis. I didn't find an attorney. None would take on a doctor(s) in California. So, I took it on myself. I know...a person who represents himself in a court of law has a fool for a client. But, I had no choice. At least I've gotten the insurance companies to take notice. Perhaps I can negotiate a settlement. It's worth a try.

J has moved out and moved on. The kids are fine. Things are relatively peaceful. But, hellbent on justice, I'm still at it. It's tough being a pitbull. The lipstick only goes so far.

At least my mother's situation is resolved. That's a box full 'o drama that I have finally put on a shelf where I don't have to look at it or think about it too much. It feels good.

Now, it's time to finish mourning and move forward with my life.

So, after being married for the majority of three decades, I'm dating again. Yep. I did more than dip my toe into the dating pool. Mind you, this swimming hole is a treacherous place. The water is murky, the attire is much more revealing than before, and there are a multitude of reasons for the liberal usage of chlorine. And, there is no lifeguard on duty! But, I jumped in...feet first (I'm not stupid enough to go into it headlong when I can't see the bottom!) I joined an online dating site.

I'm having fun and have met some interesting people. But, ultimately, I would like to find someone special. It's looking pretty dismal, though. I guess I'll have to kiss a few more frogs...
_________________________
Ex-spouse MISDIAGNOSED with SCC-HN IVa 12/10. Tonsils out 1/11. 4 teeth out 2/11. TX Erbitux x2, IMRT x2 2/11. 2nd opinion-benign BCC-NOT CANCER 3/11. TX stopped 3/11. New doctors 4/11. ENT agrees with 2nd opinion 5/11. ENT scoped him-all clear 7/11. Ordered MRI anyway. MRI 8/22/11 Result-all clear.

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#147081 - 03/13/12 09:59 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Sandy177]
lam007 Offline
"OCF Down Under"
Supporting Member (50+ posts)

Registered: 12/01/11
Posts: 60
Loc: NSW Australia
You go, girl. Have a blast.
_________________________
CG to husband Stage IV SCC left tonsil 11/11. Mets to 7 nodes on left, 2 on right, no distant mets. PEG, 7 weeks radiation and weekly Cisplatin ended Feb 10, 2012. PET 04/12 areas consistent with inflammation, complete response in nodes. Recurrence 09/13 pulmonary lymphatics. Died 22 Oct following an allergic reaction to Erbitux.

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#147082 - 03/13/12 10:30 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: lam007]
Anne-Marie Offline
Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)

Registered: 11/03/06
Posts: 2503
Loc: TN
Good for you Sandy!! For someone as special as you are, it may take a little more research to find someone at your level, who deserves your talents and what you have to offer in a relationship. And then sometimes, it happens when you lease expect it! Have fun! You so-o-o-o-o deserve it!
_________________________
Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)




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#147084 - 03/13/12 03:20 PM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Anne-Marie]
Shelley K Offline
Platinum Member (300+ posts)

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 307
Loc: North Hills, CA
I'm happy to hear this Sandy and just have fun with it! As pretty and smart as you are, you will have no trouble!! But I agree, you may have to kiss more frogs to find your prince but I have no doubt that he is out there!!

Hugs,

Shelley
_________________________
Caregiver to husband Ron. Throat Cancer. Finished 35 radiation treatments on 11/21/04. 8/2/11 small lesion on lower gum, laser Procedure to remove. 3/6/12 Doc. removed another lesion on outside of his neck. Did a skin graft from his chest to replace the skin on his neck. Went to Heaven on 6/24/12.

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#147096 - 03/14/12 02:10 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Shelley K]
KP5 Offline
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 784
Loc: NY
LOL...Just remember what we have all learned regarding HPV.... Just kidding...sort of!!!
_________________________
Kathy wife/caregiver to:
Kevin age:53
Dx 7/15/11
HPV16+ SCC Stage IV BOT/R
Non smoker, casual drinker
7/27/11 Cistplatin, taxotere,5FU 2/3week sessions, followed by IMRT 125cgy x 60 (2x daily) w/Erbitux weekly. Last rad 10/26/11. Last Erbitux 10/27/11
PEG placed 9/1/11 Removed 11/8/11
Clear PET 10/2012

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#147139 - 03/15/12 02:35 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: KP5]
Sandy177 Offline
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)

Registered: 01/17/11
Posts: 571
Loc: California
Thank you for the kind words, ladies! I really appreciate the encouragement. It's a whole new game out there. I'm reminding myself that it's more important to find the right one than to find one right now.

Oh, for sure, HPV worries me. I used to think all I was going to get from kissing frogs was a wart. Times surely have changed. smile
_________________________
Ex-spouse MISDIAGNOSED with SCC-HN IVa 12/10. Tonsils out 1/11. 4 teeth out 2/11. TX Erbitux x2, IMRT x2 2/11. 2nd opinion-benign BCC-NOT CANCER 3/11. TX stopped 3/11. New doctors 4/11. ENT agrees with 2nd opinion 5/11. ENT scoped him-all clear 7/11. Ordered MRI anyway. MRI 8/22/11 Result-all clear.

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#147158 - 03/15/12 05:43 PM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Sandy177]
seattlepaul Offline
Contributing Member (25+ posts)

Registered: 02/14/12
Posts: 38
Loc: Washington
From a guy;
Perhaps if you thought of dating as Entertainment, what a collection of short humous (hopefully) stories you could write.
Perhaps start you out in a new career...
_________________________
69yo male, Steam Engineer, Me=4,SCC=0, loving wife, living life as it comes (no other option)
We are all born from Mother, but live and die alone.
Make the best of it, Mommie did all she could, daddy was just a guidance councelor, the rest is ALL up to you.
...and now, 3rd occurance: Surgery 5/1/12

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#147186 - 03/16/12 09:55 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: seattlepaul]
Anne-Marie Offline
Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)

Registered: 11/03/06
Posts: 2503
Loc: TN
Sandy - Stories (humorous or not) are a great idea! Your experiences could be very helpful to others out there, contemplating jumping into the pool. You might end up publishing your own "How-To" manual!! You could also start by making an outline of the "someone special" with the qualities you most admire and then let the universe take care of it for you (or see what the online dating site comes up with). It is so encouraging to see you taking charge and looking forward to a new wonderful life!!
_________________________
Anne-Marie
CG to son, Paul (age 33, non-smoker) SCC Stage 2, Surgery 9/21/06, 1/6 tongue Rt.side removed, +48 lymph nodes neck. IMRTx28 completed 12/19/06. CT scan 7/8/10 Cancer-free! ("spot" on lung from scar tissue related to Pneumonia.)




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#147387 - 03/21/12 07:29 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Anne-Marie]
Sandy177 Offline
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)

Registered: 01/17/11
Posts: 571
Loc: California
Thanks Paul and Anne-Marie! I love those suggestions!

Sandy
_________________________
Ex-spouse MISDIAGNOSED with SCC-HN IVa 12/10. Tonsils out 1/11. 4 teeth out 2/11. TX Erbitux x2, IMRT x2 2/11. 2nd opinion-benign BCC-NOT CANCER 3/11. TX stopped 3/11. New doctors 4/11. ENT agrees with 2nd opinion 5/11. ENT scoped him-all clear 7/11. Ordered MRI anyway. MRI 8/22/11 Result-all clear.

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#147423 - 03/23/12 06:55 AM Re: Smooching Amphibians [Re: Sandy177]
Sandy177 Offline
"Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)

Registered: 01/17/11
Posts: 571
Loc: California
Well, I'm the last person who would ever be qualified to write a how to manual. Oh, the universe delivers perfection and a little misunderstanding mucks everything up. I better just forget about all of it. I need to live my life and not leave any room for anyone to get in. It just isn't meant to be.


Edited by Sandy177 (03/23/12 07:26 AM)
_________________________
Ex-spouse MISDIAGNOSED with SCC-HN IVa 12/10. Tonsils out 1/11. 4 teeth out 2/11. TX Erbitux x2, IMRT x2 2/11. 2nd opinion-benign BCC-NOT CANCER 3/11. TX stopped 3/11. New doctors 4/11. ENT agrees with 2nd opinion 5/11. ENT scoped him-all clear 7/11. Ordered MRI anyway. MRI 8/22/11 Result-all clear.

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