| | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | OP  "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 | I feel so feeble for being in bits because of a "it's probably nothing" biopsy. But I feel that if I don't get the results soon I will explode into a million tiny pieces. No amount of tough self talk will help.
Realised last night that it's not just the biopsy but about three other major stresses which have dragged me down since Christmas and have stripped the tough skin off my coping skills. I got quite depressed after helping a son (successfully) through a potential relationship break-up. I have recently felt a lot of self pity (should feel sorry for HIM) about my older husband's memory and cognitive decline.
Other parts of my life have gone quite well but there've been some cataclysmic changes so I'm probably wobbling on the verge of depression.
Even if I get a good result, I think I'll be in a slump. I will get help!
One good thing I did was to ring the clinic and ask to talk to the registrar. All the doctors are on a week long course but the very kind receptionist said that she'll make sure the results will be faxed to the GP if they get there by Friday.
So I took some assertive action for myself - made me feel a wee bit better.
Just trying to clear the mental clutter here and there's nothing quite like writing it down.
1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF Canuck" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,357 Likes: 5 | Good for you to take the bull by the horn and make sure your results will be there soon.
Sounds like you do have alot going on in your life, and sometimes it isn't even the big ticket things that get you down (you have a few of those!), but even just the mundane every day irritants.
Hang in there....we understand......you are perfectly normal.. and... This too shall pass.
Hugs
Donna
Donna,69, SCC L Tongue T2N1MO Stg IV 4/04 w/partial gloss;32 radtx; T2N2M0 Stg IV; R tongue-2nd partial gloss w/graft 10/07; 30 radtx/2 cispl 2/08. 3rd Oral Cancer surgery 1/22 - Stage 1. 2022 surgery eliminated swallowing and bottom left jaw. Now a “Tubie for Life”.no food envy - Thank God! Surviving isn't easy!!!! .Proudly Canadian - YES, UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE IS WONDERFUL! (Not perfect but definitely WONDERFUL)
| | | | | Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 | I have a saying...when you get demoralized, Vaporize! And by vaporizing I mean using a medicinal herb that may or maynot be legal in your area and subject it to water vapor through a special contraption which allows you to inhale the released "medication". This will assists in your positive outlook, feeling of wellbeing, sense of humor and appetite.
Listen, dealing with this stuff is tough and every now and again everyone needs a little assistance with their outlook. If it takes chemical assistance then so be it. Personally I feel that reading, listening to music and surrounding myself with inspirational, upbeat people keep me sharp...but now and again I need a different kind of assistance and I'm not ashamed to admit it. It also helps me eat and sleep. By whatever means possible!
Keep your chin up!
Eric
Young Frack, SCC T4N2M0, Cisplatin,35+ rads,ND, RT Mandiblectomy w fibular free flap, facial paralysis, "He who has a "why" to live can bear with almost any "how"." -Nietzche "WARNING" PG-13 due to Sarcasm & WAY too much attitude, interact at your own risk.
| | | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | OP "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 | Sounds good and I'm all for people taking the steps they need to cope:) I think that something so natural is a good thing but I'm too old to start!
I feel better after having talked to a bloke at work whom I hardly know. The mind is such a weird, weird thing.
1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.
| | | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | | OP "OCF Down Under, Kiwi" "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts)
Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 644 Likes: 1 | "No evidence of recurrence". Phew.
1996, ovarian cancer surgery + cisplatin and taxol.
September, 2007, SCC of left lateral tongue. Excision.
October, 2009 recurrence in scar tissue, T1NOMO. Free flap surgery from left wrist - neck dissection. 63 year old New Zealander. No chemo, no RT.
February, 2014. New primary in left buccal mucosa. Marginal mandibulectomy, neck dissection, right arm free forearm flap. T1N0M0 but third occurrence and some areas of concern: RT started 8 April and finished 19 May.
| | | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 |
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
| | | | | Joined: May 2002 Posts: 2,152 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: May 2002 Posts: 2,152 | Great news! Go Celebrate!
Take care,
Eileen
----------------------
Aug 1997 unknown primary, Stage III
mets to 1 lymph node in neck; rt ND, 36 XRT rad
Aug 2001 tiny tumor on larynx, Stage I total laryngectomy; left ND
June 5, 2010 dx early stage breast cancer
June 9, 2011 SCC 1.5 cm hypo pharynx, 70% P-16 positive, no mets, Stage I
| | | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | | Administrator, Director of Patient Support Services Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)
Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 10,507 Likes: 7 | Congrats!!!! Im so happy that you are not facing a recurrence!!! Go out and celebrate!!!! 
ChristineSCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar both Stag I, age44 2x cispltn-35 IMRT end 9/27/07 -65 lbs in 2 mo, no caregvr Clear PET 1/08 4/4/08 recur L chk Stag I surg 4/16/08 clr marg 215 HBO dives 3/09 teeth out, trismus 7/2/09 recur, Stg IV 8/24/09 trach, ND, mandiblctmy 3wks medicly inducd coma 2 mo xtended hospital stay, ICU & burn unit PICC line IV antibx 8 mo 10/4/10, 2/14/11 reconst surg OC 3x in 3 years very happy to be alive | | | | | Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 1,301 "OCF Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | | "OCF Down Under" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts)
Joined: Aug 2007 Posts: 1,301 | Even though you already have my congratulations Maureen its kinda more official when posted here  Celebrating sounds like a great idea and I want pic's !! Love Gabriele
History Leukoplakia bx 8/2006 SCC floor mouth T3N0M0- Verrucous Carcinoma.
14 hour 0p SCC-Right ND/excision/marginal mandibulectomy 9/2006, 4 teeth removed, flap from wrist, trach-ng 6 days- no chemo/rad.
6 ops and debulking (flap/tongue join) + bx's 2006-2012.
bx Jan 2012 Hyperkeratosis-Epithelial Dysplasia
24cm GIST tumour removed 8/2013. Indefinite Oral Chemo.
1/31/16 passed away peacefully surrounded by family
| | | | | Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 122 Senior Member (100+ posts) | | Senior Member (100+ posts)
Joined: Apr 2003 Posts: 122 | The pain of not knowing was, for me almost unbearable. I'm dealing with a recurrance that will involve eventual removal of my larynx-but it's SO MUCH better to know what I'm dealing with. Congrats that you can go about your business of life without the "sword of Damocles" hanging ever so precipitously above.
Thank God and the folks here that are ready, willing,able to help in very real ways.
SCC right tonsil Dx 14 Feb 03
No surg till Apr 03
Lip resection Sep 05 "frankenface"
Recurr Apr 10
2/3 tongue removed Jun 10
SPEECH/SWALLOW/DROOL challenges FUN!
Dec 10 Tumor @ nodes/larynx/cart artery growing
Erbitux Mar 11 Hyoid bone regrows!?
recur Dec 12
begin taxo chemo
10yrs-still kickin!
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