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#119417 - 07/14/10 07:02 PM Friend Has Stage IV - How Can I Support Her?
friend0510 Offline
Member

Registered: 07/14/10
Posts: 1
Loc: PA
My best friend - we have been friends for almost 30 years is 40 years old and just had a relapse after 8 months. She had part of tongue (origination) and lymph nodes on one side removed. Eight months later, her other lymph swelled with pain and she just had it removed as well as tissue, muscle, nerves that were attacked. Very aggressive as the other lymph was clear less than a year ago.

She is in recovery for a month then moving to 6 weeks of radiation.

How can I do the right thing for her - she is across the country from me. How can I be sensitive and support her the right way?
_________________________
Friend-Stage IV Oral Cancer
Tongue/1 Lymph Node Removed 11/09
2nd Lymph Node, Muscle, Nerves, Tissue Removed 7/10

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#119421 - 07/14/10 07:29 PM Re: Friend Has Stage IV - How Can I Support Her? [Re: friend0510]
ChristineB Offline
Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts)

Registered: 06/23/07
Posts: 2835
Loc: PA
Thanks for joining OCF. You are a kind and caring person. Your friend is lucky to have found such a great lifelong pal. As a good friend, it would help her to have her join this site. Im sure she has experiences that could help others and we can help her thru the recurrance.

While going thru radiation there are many things that can be done to help someone. If she has children, arrange for them to go out so she has time to rest. Hire a babysitter to take them a couple hours a few days a week. Maybe hire a cleaner to come help her clean house or do laundry. Picking up prescriptions and groceries are ways to help as well. Its difficult to think of things to do since you arent local to her. Everyone needs to have support, lending an ear is very helpful. Sometime people run away from a cancer patient. Being there for her in this time of need is important so she doesnt feel isolated.

Have your friend contact the American Cancer Society. They can help with transportation for when she is going thru radiation. They also can help her pay for prescriptions.

Best wishes to your friend with her treatments.
_________________________
Christine

Stg 1 SCC 6/15/07 L chk & by L molar, age45
2x cispltn-35 rad end 9/27/07
4/4/08 recur L cheek
surg 4/16/08 clr marg
125 HBO, trismus
3/09 teeth out
7/2/09 its back..Stg 4
8/24/09 trach, ND, 10hr surg L jaw removd
slowly recovering

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