Hi Tammara, not sure if this helps or not. Last April we found out that my wife was terminal and as I pressed for a timeline was told typically a person with her diagnosis would have about a year and in her case hopefully longer with receiving treatment. Without treatment, would anticipate four to six months. She has been receiving chemo atleast every three weeks, gone through numerous chemo drugs but has just past the year mark and as I again pressed for where we are at, were told that six months of "good" health would be reasonable. My estimate is that she sleeps around fourteen hours a day and generally doesn't have a lot of energy but that still leaves us seven or eight hours a day of time together once I come home from work. Our schedule may be very strange where she will often sleep until one or two in the afternoon, catching a short nap while using the feeding pump and then staying up until one or two in the morning when her nightime feeding ends. I guess just trying to say that even if you do need to keep working, try to optomize the time you have together.

Don't know what type of support system you have but something that helped us immensely was that family, friends and coworkers held a garage sale, bake sale etc. that raised some money for us that allowed me to take some time off work. For us this was at the early part of diagnosis and treatment but think that if your friend knew your situation, would love to come up with ways to help. If that is not an option (or even if it is) try contacting the American Cancer Society to see if you can receive some help with the medical bills and try to come up with a way to take some time off unpaid while his health is still holding up.

So sorry that you are having to deal with this, will keep you, your husband and family in our prayers.

Tammara-I just read your post as I do not come here as often as I should. I also did not get a timeline-even when my husband was admitted to a Hospice facility. They truly cannot tell until the end is very close. I too wanted specifics but wasn't given any. if you have any time try to read "Final Gifts" by Maggie Callanan. I read this after my husband passed but wish I had known about it before. It helps you relax and pay attention to what the person is saying. I tried too hard to pay attention to the physical issues instead of the spiritual ones. Maybe that was all I could handle at the time. Please let me know if you need to talk to someone-I'm available and have been where you are. Peace and strength, Sue

I am sorry for you and your family Cookey is the best one to talk to about this. Your family is in our thoughts and prayers!! Semper-Fi Bob

I admire Hubert very much for his gumption and you for doing your best to help while you still have a job to do. You are both special people in the scheme of life as we know it with OC. I hope the cancer Society can help you out or have an idea who can. Got you both in my prayers.

Cookey:
Your posts here make me feel so much better. I know that you have been through this same thing, and have seen how devastating it can be first hand. I have taken Family Medical Leave from my job and am at home now full time with my husband, Hubert. It is unpaid leave, and we will struggle financially for the next couple of months, but it is nothing that I cannot handle. Hubert continues to be in pain regardless of the amount or type of pain meds they have him taking. His eye is swollen nearly shut. He cannot hear or see from the right side at all. He is sleepy all the time from the meds, and is still taking his tube feedings. We are though, enjoying our time together. I am happy that I can be the one to help care for him at this time. I don't know how much longer we will have, but for whatever it is, I will be thankful. Smiles... Tammara

Tammara, my thoughts are with you.
David

I'm so glad you're able to be at home with your husband - I'm sure you will never regret that decision. I know it has to be so hard for both of you but know that you will truly cherish your time together. Enjoy it. I will be keeping you and Hubert in my prayers. Take care.

Nancy T