I have been very strong up till about 5 hours ago. Mom has been in a lot of pain all day. We will be going to see a specialist tomorrow and I am going to stop by her RO's office and get seomthingmore for her pain. I am beside myself with fear, it just hit me about an hour ago....really hit me that I mimght lose my mom. I'm not ready for that. Earlier she was crying and said it would be easier if a bus hit her. She has no idea what is in store for her with the radiation. I've read some post where people have made it through fairly easy...then the others who have been through hell. If this is happening now, prior to tx, what is going to happen once it begins. Is it ok for me to say that i hate everyone that has been involved in this case, that her first appointment was 4/25 and nothing has been done yet?!? I am beside myself with anger and no where to turn. I know that the ro will help but this is taking to long.
it's unfair
thanks for letting me vent

Donna, take your medication, it helps. It is a mood changer...It works very fast. Get more painkillers for your MOM. Just ask and they will give you what is required. Think POSITIVE..get your game plan together..remember our many emails..read them..Dont think about the negative, this forum will help you get through it. Get the doctors to move faster. I can tell you from experience the waiting hurts. Read the many posts here. These people are here for you..just ask..Every once in awhile these negative issues arise. Keep Positive, you can beat this. As caregivers were all have been there. Turn every negative into a positive..I know you have the strength to get this through. Remind your MOM that she is strong also and she MUST get through it.
Take care, Carol Ann

Hey Carol,
I shared your post with her, she said to say thank you. Today was a much better day than yesterday. I'm tired and going to head to bed soon....I hope!
Thanks,
Donna

Donna

Think positive! I too have these radiation fears, but you must remember each person reacts differently.

Not to compare scars here but it was 60 days before I finally got treatment. (no insurance)

I once stated that I would get better treatment if I was a dog that got hit by a car.

The danger to your Mom was the surgery, and that is why they are forgoing it. The radiation won't be easy, but it will not give her a heart attack as they feared the surgery would.

Throw away ALL those negative thoughts!

Donna, food for thought. My husband received 35 radiation treatments and you would never know he received any until the last 2 weeks of radiation. He started to have redness on his throat then, more pain in his throat. The chemo the first time was a breeze. (he came home and worked on the farm) The second time he was ill for 3 days. Different individuals, different symptoms. Live ONE DAY AT A TIME!!! You can pull your MOM through this. We are here to help..
Experiences from individuals who have been through this will help you. Caregivers who have supported their loved ones, will help you...Think POSITIVE. Take care...Carol Ann.

Today is great! I was having a really strange two days....sorry about that. I know to be positive, I don't know what came over me....I guess fear and my defenses were down.
Thanks. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend! I'm going to see about just playing with my kids, the dog and Eddie. Love to all.

Hang in there Donna!!! You will have good days and maybe not so good days.. I should be more positive right..LOL..My husband is considering NOT having his 3rd chemo. He is so sick with his sore throat and now spitting us mucous. He told me today he would make up his own mind not me. He also said he would have to see results before he would consider the chemo. Very frustrating but it is his life. We will have to wait and see.
Take care and have a good weekend. Carol Ann.

Donna,

It was great talking to your mom today. She seems to be in a good place right now. I think that now that the decision to go ahead with the radiation rather than the surgery has made things better for her.

Seems like you are doing much better, too. It is great to see a post like your last one.

My offer to help out with driving is an open one and as things get closer, we can talk some more about it.

I'll give the dentist a call after you get me her number.

Jerry

Thanks Jerry. Your call to her really brightened her feelings about everything. I'm not presently at home, so I don't have the number on me, will get it to you by tomorrow. You'll like the dentaist, she is a piece of work! She looked at mom's partials and had this funny smirk on her face...funny how she could be laugh and it didn't offend, yet when the other doc did he was hurtful. I am in a good place, right now I feel like it's going to be ok. I like the doctors who are working with mom and I trust them. I just widh I didn't have this gut wrneching feeling that that ct/pet scans are going to devastate. They usually take a few days for results, don't they? I'm not able to go with mom on Tuesday, my sister is going, I could change things around if necessary. Hope you are having a nice weekend. Thanks for offering to drive-much appreciated.
Donna