I'm a worrier by nature so this might be premature to post, but I'm worried sick about being a mom with cancer. (I have a spot on my tongue I'm worried about and an ENT appointment on Feb. 5.)

Right now, I just have worries about cancer but it's making me stressed out and short tempered with my kids. I have two boys, ages 4 and almost 7. If I do have cancer, how can I be the mom they need and support them? I think I'm so worried about this because my dad died of cancer at age 42 (I'm almost 36) so I know it can happen.

My apologies if I shouldn't have posted here since I already posted in the diagnosis thread. I'd just really love to hear advice from parents.

-Carrie

Hi - see my other response to you. Hugs! I hear you on the kids!

Carrie, your post is in the right place. You have enough going on. Dont sweat the small stuff like where to put a post.

Let your children be the motivation you need to get thru this. Stay busy with your family to keep your mind off the worrying. Its not cancer til the biopsy comes back saying its cancer.

Hi Carrie,
IF...if this is c then one thing I would suggest is letting the kids know that Mommy has an owie and might be a little sick and maybe even grumpy, but you will be ok in awhile and love them very much. Our kids were older; 13,11,and 9. We brought them to the center so they could see everything Dad would be going through. We made sure they understood that Dad might be sick for awhile but that it was actually to make him better. Your 4 year old won't understand that maybe, but your 7 year old might. It's just better to let them know it's ok that you're sick and that you will get better. It also offers great snuggle time when you're resting. The kids sat with Daddy and watched movies. Depending on tx, there might be a few times you'll need to not have them on your lap, but the docs will warn you.
But, let's just say you won't have to worry about any of it!!!
Kathy

Carrie

Again, let's hope it's not cancer. I think parents/patients find their children as a major motiviation & source of strength to get thru this. It's important as EricS quotes: To have a Why.
I agree with what the other posters before me said.
We do have mothers on OCF as you will see if you stick around
(although honestly, we all hope you do not, that you have zero reason to do so, that you do not have cancer, because we do not need one more member of our club)
Charm

Hi Carrie - It's good you found this place to come to and I'm glad you have the appointment with the ENT. It's always best to find out for sure what it is cuz it might just be nothing at all. Sometimes a "spot" is just a spot. Just waiting for news is really tough - it's best to keep busy -children can help to distract you from worrying and you have two awesome little boys to help you with that! Let us know how it goes with the ENT appointment.

Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts! I'll keep you posted.

Hi Carrie, love for your children will be your survival. My cousin had cancer when she was only 24 years old & she prayed to live long enough to live until her very young kids were old enough to bring them up & to remember her. Her kids are grown up now & she is enjoying her grand children. Over the years she had 3 different types of cancer & kept up due to her love for her kids. She is 50+ now & cancer free. My prayers go to you & all mothers with cancer, it may be just a nothing spot & not cancer. Bob

If it's any help I am a 30 year old mom to two little boys, ages 3 and 6. I was just diagnosed with polymorphous low level adenocarcenoma, which is rare but fortunately not aggressive and has a good outlook. It's possible that the surgery to remove the tumor is all the treatment I need. It is scary, my mind can't help but think what-if's sometimes. But the other replies are right, they give us a reason to fight! Keep you chin up, I will too, and I hope your outcome is that you don't have cancer!