Anger may be part of the coping mechanisms with cancer. There are several stages in the process of coping with this reality. The first stage is Denial and Isolation, than Anger, followed by Depression, and finally there is Acceptance.

Some people get �stuck� at a certain stage such as Depression, or Anger. It is important to move on and get to the final stage of acceptance and hope. Dealing with the cancer emotionally is one of the most difficult problems that a head and neck cancer patient has to face. The challenges of life in the shadow of cancer make it hard to accept. The inability or difficulty to speak make it difficult to express emotions and can lead to isolation.

The social stigma associated with admitting a pshycological problem makes it difficult to reach and treat many individuals that need therapy. Surgical cure is not enough and there should be more emphasize about mental well being after surgery or medical treatment.

This is why professional help and understanding and help by family and friends are very important. Getting psychological counseling for the patient and his/her caregiver(s) is very important.

I Brook MD
Blog Site: http://dribrook.blogspot.com

I have yet to get mad or upset at anyone or anything except a couple of Drs that are know it alls. When it comes to intelligent, I classify them as being dumber in the head than a mule is in the ASS. Life goes on anyway.

Nice discussion Doc, albeit somewhat redundant of your most recent post. I'm skeptical of the specificity of the "Stages" theories (popularized in 1969 by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' Death and Dying). Her Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression & Acceptance have achieved mythic status without any real scientific support. It was refreshing to read the 2007 JAMA (Journal of American Medicine) article :An Empirical Examination of the Stage Theory of Grief which found that
[quote]Counter to stage theory, disbelief was not the initial, dominant grief indicator. Acceptance was the most frequently endorsed item and yearning was the dominant negative grief indicator from 1 to 24 months postloss.
[/quote] The full abstract is here: JAMA -stages of grief
I realize this is a hot button issue as evident from the study's Yale author's emphatic reply to criticisms:
[quote]In Reply: The stage theory of grief has captured the imaginations of clinicians and the public. Despite its recognized limitations (eg, that it will not predict exactly how every bereaved person will grieve), it remains taught in medical schools, posted on authoritative Web sites (eg, National Cancer Institute),1 and continues to guide thinking about bereavement for many clinicians, educators, and researchers. Although several reviews have concluded that this theory has no support, our study represents the first empirical test of the stage theory. We are aware of no previous study that used the necessary grief measures or the analytic strategy to explicitly test the stage theory of grief.[/quote]
If you want practical examples of Why are We Angry - you can take a look at the most viewed thread on the entire OCF web site : Don't you Just Hate It When... with almost 43 Thousand views (disclaimer:okay, I started that thread and continue to acclaim it so I'm biased).
Of course as EZJim noted, one of our major complaints are the same attitudes of the doctors that you so eloquently skewered in your e-book. Your discussion of how they disregarded you and treated you rings true for many of us.
Myself, I'm going with a much simpler paradigm: you need to fully mourn the life that you lost and then accept the life that you are really living now.
Charm

lol Charm, we so think alike...and read the same articles as I was going to point out the contention of the Kubler-Ross model. Apparently the good Dr here hasn't read George Bonanno, professor of clinical psychology at Columbia University. According to his book and other major studies supported by NIH, NIMH and the National Science Foundation over 20 years showed that the stages of grief didn't exist.

Now I have to say, I dislike medical professionals..sorry Doc, no offense, but most of them can't see past their medical degrees. All but a small minority actually look at their patients as anything more then the disease or condition they are treating.

But apparently I have anger issues and suffer from depression so what do I know

Hahaha Eric

Charm, sorry to burst your bubble. Your post 'Don't you Just Hate It' is the second most read post on OCF. The most read post on OCF has a little over 85,000 views. It was titled 'ChristineB', it was about my fight last year and the never ending hospital stay.

Having read thousands of posts over the last four years i conclude that all such research is crap.No two people react the same to a cancer diagnosis or a death sentance.Thats my conclusion.

Liz - I like your conclusion. And your candor. Very refreshing.

Christine

I couldn't be happier that OCF members viewed your thread the most. With all you do here, despite all you have endured, it's truly just that your eponymous thread is number one.
I will immediately cease and desist from claiming primary status. Of course I can't stop O.J. Simpson from joining the OCF forum and continuing his promotion of "We're number two" that he used to do for Avis.
Seriously, we all appreciate you very much
Charm

I agree with Cookey, reaction by individuals can vary greatly.

My anger did not last long and I basically blamed myself for not being more diligent leading up to my diagnosis. Which seems all too common with OC, sad but true. Maybe I should have seen a professional but it's not in my genes to do so and I like to believe sooner or later I come to my senses. I do like to reflect on different life matters and when I do that I like to do it my way. Anger has never really been an issue with me...I view it as a waste of time that hinders oneself including hurting those around us. Negativity breeds negativity and that can be dangerous.


Although, I do believe that research and documenting history of anything is extremely important.

The difficulties in expressing oneself through speaking make it very difficult to express oneself verbally and the buildup of emotions and frustrations is expressed as anger towards others. The tragedy is that often the people closer to the needy individual get the outbursts of anger.
This creates more tension and isolation.

This is why professional counseling for the person and his caretakers is very important.

I Brook MD
Blog Site: http://dribrook.blogspot.com

Hey Doc

Just wondering why you spelled Angry with an extra e in the subject line of your thread? The urban dictionary defines your spelling [angery) as: [quote]A sarcastic, condescending, or taunting use of the word angry used on someone who is angry over something trivial or insignificant. Typically used in jest in some sort of explosive statement.[/quote]
Of course it could be just a typo. That's why professional proofreading is also very important for published authors.
Charm

Very good Charm. I've been wanting to comment on that myself but you covered it perfectly!! I guess everyone could use some kind of professional help.