Posted By: zeynepuygun mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-24-2010 09:44 PM
Hello everyone, i'm new to this forum and am here for my mother. She has larynx cancer. It's squomus cell which I know is the same with most oral cancers. I couldn't find a good larynx cancer forum, and i've been following the threads here, it seems very supportive and informative.

As you can imagine, I feel like I'm going through a never ending horror tunnel. It's been more than a year now since she's been diagnosed and I still wake up every morning wishing it was a bad trip. I pretend to be strong but I'm feeling very torn. It really breaks my heart and literally hurts my body to see her go through this.

My mother was diagnosed with stage 1 larynx cancer on December 2008. Since it was caught very early drs said there's a very high chance that RT alone should destroy the cancer. Sadly, not only it didn't cure her cancer, it had it spread to her lymph nodes which really really scares me.

They removed most of her larynx and did a neck dissection on September 2009 and couldn't do a second radiotherapy. She also had an extra capsular spread in 1 lymph node. Her first PET/CT (December 09) was clean and we burst into tears from instant relief. But in a week from today, she'll have her second checkup (a neck MRI) and I'm very stressed out. I'm scared because they only did a neck dissection and no treatments after.

My question is, how bad is this? Do you think there's a chance it won't come back? What happens if it comes back in the neck, will they just leave it to be? I usually hear that a RT needs to be done after ND but my mother didn't have that chance.

I'm the only one in my family who does some research. My mother isn't even aware of how dangerous her situation is which I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing. My dad refuses to look things up online. I'm an only child and I just feel quite lonely being the only one aware of how fatal her situation might be. I just don't think i can exist without her. So that's why i'm here, for some support.

Much love and strength to everyone who's going through this.

Thank you!
Posted By: Eileen Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-24-2010 10:39 PM
I had a total laryngectomy and a neck dissection in 2001 and no radiation because I had already had it in 1997 and thus far have not had a reoccurrence (fingers still crossed). If she has no symptoms, take a deep breath and wait for the results. Here's hoping for the best.

Take care,
Eileen
Posted By: davidcpa Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-24-2010 10:39 PM
First off try not to worry about the unknown.

Secondly there have been many who have rec'd radiation twice and some even to the same area radiated the first time so that still may be an option EVEN if it comes back.

Calm down and let's see what happens.
Posted By: zeynepuygun Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-24-2010 11:08 PM
thank you so much. I generally manage to avoid the worry except when we get so close to the check-up dates. Both of your profiles look very impressive, must feel so great to be long time survivors. Do you think she could have a second surgery option even if not radiotherapy? I get so confused.
Posted By: EzJim Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 12:24 PM
The 1st thing you have to do is settle down and quit worrying so much. I am sure your Mother knows what is going on with her body and just doesn't talk about it. Don't think Cancer until it is said to be Cancer and live your life as normaly as you can. Keep your nervousness away from your MOM as I am sure she can feel and see it in your words and that sure won't help her thru this. Your Mom has my prayers and I am sure the prayers of many others. Maybe she is one that doesn't like to talk about this until it is cured or confirmed. She is the one with the stress.
Posted By: davidcpa Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 01:57 PM
Again, don't worry about things until they are real.
Posted By: zeynepuygun Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 02:57 PM
[quote=Eileen]I had a total laryngectomy and a neck dissection in 2001 and no radiation because I had already had it in 1997 and thus far have not had a reoccurrence (fingers still crossed). If she has no symptoms, take a deep breath and wait for the results. Here's hoping for the best.

Take care,
Eileen [/quote]

Eileen, if you don't mind me asking, why did they do a total laryngectomy when your cancer was only stage 1? Just curious...my mother refused to get the procedure so they took 3/4 of her larynx even though she was stage 4. Of course, her margins are really close to the tumour. We'll see what happens.
Posted By: Eileen Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 06:25 PM
My tumor was in exactly the wrong spot, too close to the esophageal opening to get a clean margin. Had I not already had radiation, they would have used radiation. Back then, they did not do it twice. They had hoped to be able to remove it with a laser, but as I said, they would not have able to get a clean margin. I also was not a candidate for a partial because of the location. I would not have been able to eat or drink anything without asperating.

Take care,
Eileen
Posted By: zeynepuygun Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 08:59 PM
[quote=Eileen]My tumor was in exactly the wrong spot, too close to the esophageal opening to get a clean margin. Had I not already had radiation, they would have used radiation. Back then, they did not do it twice. They had hoped to be able to remove it with a laser, but as I said, they would not have able to get a clean margin. I also was not a candidate for a partial because of the location. I would not have been able to eat or drink anything without asperating.

Take care,
Eileen [/quote]

Oh i see...well, i honestly think it's for the best because now you have no fear. We tried to convince my mom, but it was all too sudden for her and she refused to get it. Now she can only whisper-speak. They did warn her about the asperating risk, she can't eat easily at all. Thank you Eileen. I hope my mom recovers just like you did. I'm so scared of losing her, terrified actually.
Posted By: Nancy T Re: mother's cancer- constant stress - 02-25-2010 09:09 PM
I will keep your mother in my prayers as well. My mother has mouth cancer and I know she has held in her worries - she almost never complains - she is amazing. The others are right - dont' worry until you have something to worry about. The best thing you can do for your Mom now is to try to keep life as normal and loving and enjoyable as possible. Take care and be strong - you will get through this.
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