Today is another day that I will never forget.

Dad had a CT scan last week and was scheduled for a PET scan today following his appointment with the H&N surgeon. The CT scan results were in but the doctor was running late so the PET scan has been rescheduled for Monday.

The CT scan showed two new tumors in his neck. There is another new tumor growing at the surgical site which is in the roof of the mouth. This tumor is extending up into his eye socket. His eye is now completely swollen shut. There are calcifications on the brain. The tumors on his neck drain and have a foul odor. He is vomiting daily and it's hard to get his nutrition in. He wears a fentanyl patch and takes percoset every 2 hours. He sleeps most of the day as he is too weak to do much of anything else.

There is no hope for a cure. Surgery is not an option. They are discussing more chemo and radiation. They say they will continue to fight the cancer until he say's that he has had enough. Unless the chemo and radiation will ease his pain he will not go through it.

So that's where we are. My only prayer is that they can keep him comfortable.

Thanks for listening.

Joy

Joy i am so sorry to hear your news.I hope you can try and keep dad as comfortable as possible,and of course pain free.If you need to talk ,my e-mail is in my profile.

love liz

Joy, my heart goes out to your father and to you. What a long, hard road he has traveled. Please let him know that I have not posted often, but I have followed his journey, and I will keep him in my prayers. .....you too!

XO--COlleen

Joy:

Im so sorry to hear your father is doing poorly. It sounds like both of you are going thru a terrible time. Maybe the doc could increase your fathers patch so he wouldnt need the percoset. It may make him more comfortable. Can he keep anything down, even anti nasuea meds?

Does your father have a peg tube to help with nutrition? That might also make him feels a little better to stay hydrated.

I wish you the best with everything you are dealing with right now. I will keep both of you in my prayers.

Christine

Joy,

Your father is great man who has won a battle already and ready to take on another.
Best of luck , your in my prayers.

Joy,

As you know, I will be praying for comfort and peace for your dad while I'm away.

I will be in touch when I'm back.

Jerry

Joy, I'm so sorry. You and you Dad are in my thoughts and prayers. Have you had any contact with hospice yet? They are often the experts at keeping someone comfortable in such an awful situation.

Nelie

Thank you all.

Hospice has not been mentioned yet. He is currently in pain management. He sees the RO Monday. I'm sure we will know more then.

It's all so much to take in right now. I'm thinking of what he needs from a medical standpoint and I'm racking my brain trying to make sure that I know everything I need to say to him and let him know. And I keep thinking..is there anything else that I need for him to tell me?? I'm sure in the last 19 months I've tried to say everything that I need to and ask everything I need to, but I'm so afraid that I've left something off and that it will come to me when it's too late and I wont be able to ask or tell him something. And that's when the reality hits me.

I hate this.

Joy

I am so very sorry that you and your family are facing such difficult times and decisions. Your Dad knows how much you love him. If you never had another conversation, he would know that. As far as medical questions, hopefully he will be able to participate in the decision making process.

We hate "this" with you.

Donna

Dad went to the RO Monday and they have decided that radiation will help shrink the tumors and provide some relief. Today he had the simulation and radiation is scheduled to start August 11th. He will have 15 treatments at the most.

He's very weak and continues to get weaker every day. In two weeks it may be impossible to get him out of the house and to the hospital for radiation an hour away.

We should have the results of his PET scan soon. Just waiting on the doctor to call with an appointment time.

Other than that I don't know much. Thank you all for your PM's and words of support. They really help.

Hugs,

Joy

Hey Joy

just keep the faith girl.he might just surprise you about how strong he can be if there is a chance of some relief from his symptoms.

love and hugs liz

Joy:

Its encouraging to hear your dad has a treatment plan. Your family is in my prayers.

Wish him the best. I wish I could offer more.

After many hugs and tears yesterday we made the decision to not to put Dad through the radiation treatments.

We will be getting him into the hospice program where he will be kept comfortable until the end.

The cancer is still spreading in the neck and now one of the tumors is starting to extend upwards behind his ear.

To do radiation on him, we feel, would just put him through more pain, even though the radiation should help the pain - but then again, the drugs that hospice gives him should take care of that. We just thought that the end result is all the same, it just the means you take to get there.

His name is Jim, please keep him in your prayers.

Hugs,

Joy

Joy

What a difficult time this must be for your family right now. Your poor father has been thru so much already. The decision must have been so hard to make. I will pray for you and your family and of course for Jim.

Thoughts and prayers and hugs sent your way Joy and to all of your family.

Deb

Joy:
Thoughts, love, and lots & lots of prayers to your Father, you, and your Family.
Warm Regards,
Steve

Dad is still with us but continues to decline. Hospice will pay a visit tomorrow. Mom is now full of questions for her.

My mom is one amazing woman. She will be 76 years old this October. She only stands about 4'10" tall. I see so much love between her and my dad right now. She is an RN but hasn't been in nursing for years, so she knows from a medical standpoint how to care for dad, but she handles him with such love and tenderness. It's so beautiful, but so sad at the same time.

I know the end is near but I'm ready for dad to finally be at rest. I'd rather miss him for the rest of my life than to see him suffer like this.

Thanks for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers.

Joy

Dear Joy, I assure you of my prayers for your dad and you and your mom. What a difficult time in your lives! I know from reading your loving posts and from our early correspondence what a very special, faith-filled family you are.

Please know that all of your OCF family are holding your family in our thoughts.

XO--Colleen

Joy, I am so sorry this is where your Dad's battle has wound up and I'm sure the decision to not put him through more treatment was a hard one for everyone involved. I hope hospie helps make your Dad's passing an easy one and that you have time left to share with each other everything that needs to be shared. Your mom is blessed to have you to help her through this time.

I just lost my father last fall and I know how hard that can be, no mtter how much warning you have. You are all in my thoughts.

Nelie

Joy,
Your father is very fortunate to have such a loving family taking care of him at this difficult time. My prayers are with you at this time.
Malka

Dad has now been removed from all medication except for the hospice meds. He is no longer able to get out of bed and has a catheter. They will be delivering oxygen for him tomorrow. They have said that he has 2 - 3 weeks or less.

Colleen - I still have the first correspondence I sent you out here. You were a tremendous help after dad's surgery explaining how to clean the surgical area and other tips for dealing with the unique problem that you both shared. Thank you so much.

Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. I know they are what is getting our family through this.

Hugs,

Joy

Joy,

Must say you and your family are a very strong , my dad has just become cancer free 3 months back , and even smallest swelling scares the hell out of me ....
your family will be in my prayer.

Joy,
I am praying for you and your family.

Paula