Hello folks, I hope all is well in OCF land. You Brits keep it up. I so enjoy reading your post. What I was wondering about is the mixed feelings that start when the anniversary dates start roling around. October 16th is the 1 year mark since my DX and although I am very grateful to be here to feel this way I still feel very sad. All I can really think about is the misery and the sickness from the chemo, the pain, disconforts and side effects of the radiation, the loss of taste, and the new life as I know it now. I am so very thankful I am able to sit here and express these feelings but this is/was a journey I would not wish on any person. I am so very grateful for this board and I thank you Brian for all you have done and will do. Is this abnormal and I need help or is this understandable and part of the healing process? I don't know. Thanks for letting me vent.

Hey Bill.Firstly congrats on your anniversary,and secondly,yes i think it is perfectly understandable.
Although i was only a caregiver i am approaching a barrage of "anniversaries".

One year since his last visit to the Dentist,one year since his last birthday,one year since our wonderful trip up into the Yorkshire moors,one year since the lump in his neck appeared and in a month it will be one year since he went to the doctor for the first time.
But mostly to me it makes me say "i cant believe that only one year ago he was apparently fit and well and we were living our lives"

I am sure that you to must be thinking about what life was like before that day just one short year ago.
Next year you will be celebrating the one year anniversary of the new normal and hopefully some of the horror of this year will have faded and it will be a truely joyeous day.

much love LIz