Been absent for a while, trying to come to terms with yet another loss in our family.
I want to write something, actually need to, and yet I am at such a loss for words....they feel so empty. I have lost members in my own family, you would think I would know what to say to Eddie and his sisters, yet everything sounds so inappropiate. My daughters are both having a difficult with his death, I am too.
Did you ever feel like you don't know what to do to help yourself?
Before I forget I wanted to thank everyone here for your kind words and for your suggestions, they were very much appreciated.
Love,
Donna
Donna,
I am so sorry to hear how painful the situation is for you. You are saying exactly what your heart feels and what you are saying to us is what you should say to Eddie, his sisters and your daughters. The things I am hearing you say is that you are at a loss for words, that everything you want to say feels so empty but you want them to know so bad how much you love them and how much you are struggling with it all. Tell them you wish there were words you could say that would make their pain go away but there just aren't. Life just doesn't make sense sometimes and no matter how hard we try we don't know why so many people have to suffer from this horrible disease. Acknowledge that it affects all those that love someone when cancer takes their life.
Maybe sit down and try to think of the good memories and some fun things about all the interrelationships of the family. Hugs to you and everyone. There is nothing easy when it comes to cancer.
Ed
Thanks Ed. I have shared exactly that with everyone, but still feels empty. We do have some nice memories, he was a gentle person, easy to talk to and you could feel how much he enjoyed spending time with all of us.
The night before he died Ed, his sisters and I all had a "slumber party" with Pop-pop. They were all so frightened to leave him and to stay at the same time...think us all being together made it a bit easier. I know in my heart his dad could feel us right there.
Thank you for your kind words, the support is always so helpful. I know at times none of us knows what to write to each other in times such as these.
Donna,
From the time you first posted about Ed's father it was obvious that he was a very dear person in your life. The term in-law does not seem to apply to your relationship with your husband's family. May you all be comforted by each other as you pass through these difficult days.
Malka